04-07-2015, 12:00 AM
Oculus wrote:Yes, billy, it is stupid to underrate the ability to let go of ones thoughts and structure and dissolve into an outside event. I think I am re-saying what you just meant...sensation of having your senses become part of something else...
No Oculus, you are not re-saying what I just meant.
I pay attention to the WORLD to distinguish and emphasize my separation. I draw power from that.
Seeing an outside phenomenon, is not to "become part of something else." Oppositely, I relish the objective of being APART, especially from the world in WHOLE.
A more extreme sensation of falling out of world and into my heart, can induce a rush of adrenalin initially. As the outside world disappears, I am DRAWN to shutting down my SELF. This can prompt serotonin, oxytocin, endorphins, neurotransmitters, etc.
I intend a sensational climax in love of my isolation!
Ultimately I want to be a part of existence, but not as a person. I don't want that. My worthlessness that way is a given. I recreate myself as an object, and gobble up the putrid SENSE of my own existence. I peel clean indentity, or at least the sense of deserving one.
I pleasure in thick, rich, sensuality of SELF rejection. The pure aliveness is rapture.
A profitable result of this 'self negation exercise' is the cultivated soil for easier detachment and peaceful SELF.
No Oculus, you are not re-saying what I just meant.
I pay attention to the WORLD to distinguish and emphasize my separation. I draw power from that.
Seeing an outside phenomenon, is not to "become part of something else." Oppositely, I relish the objective of being APART, especially from the world in WHOLE.
A more extreme sensation of falling out of world and into my heart, can induce a rush of adrenalin initially. As the outside world disappears, I am DRAWN to shutting down my SELF. This can prompt serotonin, oxytocin, endorphins, neurotransmitters, etc.
I intend a sensational climax in love of my isolation!
Ultimately I want to be a part of existence, but not as a person. I don't want that. My worthlessness that way is a given. I recreate myself as an object, and gobble up the putrid SENSE of my own existence. I peel clean indentity, or at least the sense of deserving one.
I pleasure in thick, rich, sensuality of SELF rejection. The pure aliveness is rapture.
A profitable result of this 'self negation exercise' is the cultivated soil for easier detachment and peaceful SELF.