Thinking

[funnyguy]

Life is a lot more than I think it is. I have shifted through dark parts of my mind and gone to amazing and beautiful heights. I have given power to fear, desperation and stupidity and been in awful positions of awareness also to my love, hope and faith and flew high in my own perception... The last couple of days I feel bad. My confidence is crushed and I feel I'm losing my will to go on. I'm not going through a difficult time I'm simply making a fly into something huge and I realize this yet I keep going in that direction. I know it is a choice and a few energetic actions away to cut what makes me feel bad but does that make it go away or do I just bottle it up? Does shifting my perception actually make the world the way I intend it or is it all in my mind? I cling to hope and believe in things I haven't achieved very abstract and strange things I no longer know if they're possible or not... Have the books taught me a lesson or did damage to me? I was damaged before them for sure and I've been feeling better after what I learned in them but is it the right way? I no longer know what I want or how to achieve what I want even if I do. All you people are amazing and beautiful and have your own unique way of perceiving and acting and I appreciate this forum immensely. I've been having a hard time communicating with people and expressing myself this is a place I do it openly and I appreciate anyone who reads this. I'm in no need for replies I just wanted to share a bit about how stupid I am. Funny thing is I can still laugh at myself.. I think I might be crazy for real. 

I know one thing for sure it is that love is amazing.