08-22-2014, 12:00 AM
quantumshaman and others: I respectfully ask your permission to let me use this thread-- promise I won't move over into other ones. Serloco, thanks for use of your awareness.
I'll mention again about foreign installations or flyers in whatever form (real or symbolic or irrelevant). Serloco hinted that at some point if I understood correctly, that these can be welcomed back. If not, I am saying that. But that is a long way off for most. Detachment as I know it is a freeing of shackles, and once they're off--they're off.
I never understood why people buy into self-help books to gain better conditions. This misses the point. I made up my mind a long time ago that what it is, as is, has to be good. I took this all the way. I said good can become bad, but the worst cannot be come 'worser.' A decade ago I got my first real test. I stupidly messed with a prostitute one day carelessly. I went and did all the tests, but I felt a need to punish my stupidity--and despair came knocking at my door. I EASILY could have detached, but made a momentus decision> I wanted to go to hell and pay. The only thing I had was the outside idea, a MAYBE TRUST this will work itself out. OH JESUS did I ever pay--I had little experience other than a break-up with a girl following my 'college zen' when it comes to a truly depressive state. The deeper I went, the deeper I went. Forlorn was a kind word at one point. Then 3:00 AM I get a call from my wife's sister that her brother committed suicide. Only one of my wife's sisters is a bit crazy and represented herself as another sister. They sound identical, and the sister really was in hysterics, but the call was a hoax. However, in the moments after I simply decided my despair was over, and the Castaneda phrase 'in the blink of an eye' comes to mind--that quick it was over completely.
So I continued to go to dark places when the timing was right--- SO THAT IS HOW SHAME GOT IN PLAY> who the f in their right mind would EVER go THERE? I have such a grin on my face, OMG I never expected the payoff to be so RICH. AND the sexy part is just a side bonus. I think I could attract any woman on the planet. That's not true maybe, but I FEEL that way-- and it sure can't hurt where those things are concerned. Know what I mean?
I really did try for self-hatred at the same time. I just do not have any. Please somebody---show some self-confidence and try the shame practice. (Thank me if you do) If you need help and ask for an email I'll help.
So serloco, while I might like buying my wife that Jaguar she has always wanted, my interest with you is that next place. There are'nt many (if any persons) that have things easier than myself, and I do ask myself some WHYS. WHY am a finding an agent for my book---WTF do I care? WHY do I suddenly find myself posting here? WHY do I mess with some lunatic (laughing) whose name letters end in loco?
By the way serloco, I expect you to say you won't take more ENERGY from me, than I get back.
I'll mention again about foreign installations or flyers in whatever form (real or symbolic or irrelevant). Serloco hinted that at some point if I understood correctly, that these can be welcomed back. If not, I am saying that. But that is a long way off for most. Detachment as I know it is a freeing of shackles, and once they're off--they're off.
I never understood why people buy into self-help books to gain better conditions. This misses the point. I made up my mind a long time ago that what it is, as is, has to be good. I took this all the way. I said good can become bad, but the worst cannot be come 'worser.' A decade ago I got my first real test. I stupidly messed with a prostitute one day carelessly. I went and did all the tests, but I felt a need to punish my stupidity--and despair came knocking at my door. I EASILY could have detached, but made a momentus decision> I wanted to go to hell and pay. The only thing I had was the outside idea, a MAYBE TRUST this will work itself out. OH JESUS did I ever pay--I had little experience other than a break-up with a girl following my 'college zen' when it comes to a truly depressive state. The deeper I went, the deeper I went. Forlorn was a kind word at one point. Then 3:00 AM I get a call from my wife's sister that her brother committed suicide. Only one of my wife's sisters is a bit crazy and represented herself as another sister. They sound identical, and the sister really was in hysterics, but the call was a hoax. However, in the moments after I simply decided my despair was over, and the Castaneda phrase 'in the blink of an eye' comes to mind--that quick it was over completely.
So I continued to go to dark places when the timing was right--- SO THAT IS HOW SHAME GOT IN PLAY> who the f in their right mind would EVER go THERE? I have such a grin on my face, OMG I never expected the payoff to be so RICH. AND the sexy part is just a side bonus. I think I could attract any woman on the planet. That's not true maybe, but I FEEL that way-- and it sure can't hurt where those things are concerned. Know what I mean?
I really did try for self-hatred at the same time. I just do not have any. Please somebody---show some self-confidence and try the shame practice. (Thank me if you do) If you need help and ask for an email I'll help.
So serloco, while I might like buying my wife that Jaguar she has always wanted, my interest with you is that next place. There are'nt many (if any persons) that have things easier than myself, and I do ask myself some WHYS. WHY am a finding an agent for my book---WTF do I care? WHY do I suddenly find myself posting here? WHY do I mess with some lunatic (laughing) whose name letters end in loco?
By the way serloco, I expect you to say you won't take more ENERGY from me, than I get back.