01-09-2015, 12:07 AM
serloco wrote: I am Silvio Manual.. I am the will. Perhaps I will disappear soon, I feel I will again.. It is a refelction you know.. When I found my way into the nagual for the first time I learned so many things, including how to make the forget me, even when they all knew everything about me.. It was like flipping through and into two dimensions. Really it was many dimensions that were fluid and constantly shifting.. I lost everyone then.. Fell far away into an IOB world.. can't get home anymore... It looks like home, but all the variables have changed.. I see IOBS.. even my parents move to my will and awareness. The books speak to me often about me, I remember casting all my feats of power into them,. they teach me too.. I am crazy now.. ***, I hate it when I loose my sanity these days.. I like it now... I can escape.. So important is escape.. I will not try to go home tho... I wil go further into the nagual this time.. I need my insanity.. It is gold and my allies love it.. Even my rage they love.. They can be all mushy ad gushy for me, loving, but when I get upset they run and hide
I posted in context and not exactly flipping--I am not changeable so much as using the direct and indirect. I told what I wanted you to SEE, then wanted it dropped because that was what is needed--a clean slate. (Just like the sand artist). Still, I'm not proficient whatsoever to be sure. You could make me run and hide too, but you WILL not do that.
You are not lost or crazy the way I SEE it. Trust me, I know you are the energy you speak of and I should shake in my boots. I WON'T! I am as commited to my sense of meaninglessness and worthlessness as deep as you are 'lost.' Lost? NOT-- You are isolated! So what? I like to look at your aloneness--it makes sense. You can look at mine--and IT can make sense too.
What standard do you want? Are you a sorcerer who has tied 'self' to conventional thinking. Oh please, don't tell me you don't have self. OF COURSE YOU DON'T. Any good dream or good recapitulation can get that through to a novice like me. Yeah, I understand no one thinks like that. These aren't words for me. I get it-- so fucking have some fun 'teaching' me or whatever the eff you do sending nagual gestures that I cannnot begin to understand, or don't. But don't ever even feign self-pity with me. Put it on another thread.
I like the power you have because it plays against me so perfectly--you have made parts of my life a beautiful symphony. I wish later on you would help me with the Dayton Flyer basketball team. Dayton is a small college that went to the final elite 8 for the national NCAA championship. I have done some things with intent there. Teams carry 13 scholarship players. This season Dayton has lost players to ineligibility, discipline and injuries and are with 6 scholarship kids and one walk-on with any ability. They are winning while entirely decimated and may actually be ranked nationally (top 25) by next week. The fact is, the chance of them qualifying for the NCAA tournament this year is realistically impossible. They are the shortest team in basketball both in height and number of players. They are going to get tired. When the time comes SEE what you can do to help me.
I like Not-doing a lot-- and I mean the lazy comfort of doing absolutely nothing. THAT's not you. BUT you can then SEE whatever eternity I could never endure and know to rest yourself at least within me. I don't mean to understand you, I know you don't want me to, or to care. I will be billy.
I posted in context and not exactly flipping--I am not changeable so much as using the direct and indirect. I told what I wanted you to SEE, then wanted it dropped because that was what is needed--a clean slate. (Just like the sand artist). Still, I'm not proficient whatsoever to be sure. You could make me run and hide too, but you WILL not do that.
You are not lost or crazy the way I SEE it. Trust me, I know you are the energy you speak of and I should shake in my boots. I WON'T! I am as commited to my sense of meaninglessness and worthlessness as deep as you are 'lost.' Lost? NOT-- You are isolated! So what? I like to look at your aloneness--it makes sense. You can look at mine--and IT can make sense too.
What standard do you want? Are you a sorcerer who has tied 'self' to conventional thinking. Oh please, don't tell me you don't have self. OF COURSE YOU DON'T. Any good dream or good recapitulation can get that through to a novice like me. Yeah, I understand no one thinks like that. These aren't words for me. I get it-- so fucking have some fun 'teaching' me or whatever the eff you do sending nagual gestures that I cannnot begin to understand, or don't. But don't ever even feign self-pity with me. Put it on another thread.
I like the power you have because it plays against me so perfectly--you have made parts of my life a beautiful symphony. I wish later on you would help me with the Dayton Flyer basketball team. Dayton is a small college that went to the final elite 8 for the national NCAA championship. I have done some things with intent there. Teams carry 13 scholarship players. This season Dayton has lost players to ineligibility, discipline and injuries and are with 6 scholarship kids and one walk-on with any ability. They are winning while entirely decimated and may actually be ranked nationally (top 25) by next week. The fact is, the chance of them qualifying for the NCAA tournament this year is realistically impossible. They are the shortest team in basketball both in height and number of players. They are going to get tired. When the time comes SEE what you can do to help me.
I like Not-doing a lot-- and I mean the lazy comfort of doing absolutely nothing. THAT's not you. BUT you can then SEE whatever eternity I could never endure and know to rest yourself at least within me. I don't mean to understand you, I know you don't want me to, or to care. I will be billy.