12-14-2008, 12:00 AM
I didn't come to this path with purpose, I stumbled upon it. Questions have arisen in me lately. Wondering to myself, whether I really am on it or not.
Having not read all of the Castaneda books, I may not be aware of the sorceric feats that some may be trying to achieve. My introduction to all of this was
with a group of people who appeared dedicated and committed to becoming better human beings. I wanted to be a better human being.
It has taken me many many years to get the part about self responsibility and I still may not get it in the moment, but only upon reflection later. It is
through these teachings that I learned that there are many ways to look at something, not just the way that I thought it looked upon first glance.
In some ways, my real learning began after I left the group that I was involved with. Filled with skepticism and a real willingness to disbelieve, I came
across these message boards. That was about 5 years ago now. Oh man...I've had my hat handed to me a few times over these years...got to 'feel' my
self important world enough to have it explode into a million pieces. Ouch!
Alongside this skepticism, has been the part of me who has had experiences that defy scientific explanation...at least thus far. I admit that I have not made a
true dedicated sustained effort on this path, but in spite of myself, I'm still learning. In some ways, I think I started on this path before I ever knew
anything about it....years before, I had started shedding layers of myself and here I am now, still shedding. I don't know..it feels like this shedding
must take place before I can really begin.
Now what? Where does one really begin?
Having not read all of the Castaneda books, I may not be aware of the sorceric feats that some may be trying to achieve. My introduction to all of this was
with a group of people who appeared dedicated and committed to becoming better human beings. I wanted to be a better human being.
It has taken me many many years to get the part about self responsibility and I still may not get it in the moment, but only upon reflection later. It is
through these teachings that I learned that there are many ways to look at something, not just the way that I thought it looked upon first glance.
In some ways, my real learning began after I left the group that I was involved with. Filled with skepticism and a real willingness to disbelieve, I came
across these message boards. That was about 5 years ago now. Oh man...I've had my hat handed to me a few times over these years...got to 'feel' my
self important world enough to have it explode into a million pieces. Ouch!
Alongside this skepticism, has been the part of me who has had experiences that defy scientific explanation...at least thus far. I admit that I have not made a
true dedicated sustained effort on this path, but in spite of myself, I'm still learning. In some ways, I think I started on this path before I ever knew
anything about it....years before, I had started shedding layers of myself and here I am now, still shedding. I don't know..it feels like this shedding
must take place before I can really begin.
Now what? Where does one really begin?