09-03-2012, 12:00 AM
It's funny you mention this XOXO, though. How he? she? manifests himself to dreamers. Brought to mind a dream I'd forgotten about last night. I'm with my wife in our bedroom at night....and she's giving me the bedroom eyes. Of course, I'm game.....always am, pretty much. We start going at it and, right in the heat of the moment, I look down and she transforms, right in front of my face, into a young girl. I jumped up, shocked...appalled...ashamed....now clearly lucid...and the dream went dark as I withdrew. Maybe that was XOXO? If so...he's another one of those assholes you allude to, seems to me. Another mine in the minefield.
And the lesson? Has nothing to do with "don't *** kids" as you so eruditely put forth here. That was never my intent, so what happened there wasn't my responsibility. But my shame...accepting it when it wasn't mine...being emotionally affected by being tricked like that....that was my responsibility. Again, detachment is the key. As mentioned, XOXO's just another mine in the minefield...and that was my appointment in dealing with it, then and there, regardless whether I intended it or not. I accept that. Live and learn. I see the edge of the field is a long way away. Sitting imobilized in fear won't do me any good. Gotta keep moving forward, slowly....carefully. I'm gonna misstep and get burned sometimes....sometimes due to my recklessness or indulgence...sometimes due to inexperience...sometimes just because getting burned is the lesson to learn. So be it. No shame.
I agree, forebearance is important...crucial even. But sticking your head in the sand isn't the same thing.
And the lesson? Has nothing to do with "don't *** kids" as you so eruditely put forth here. That was never my intent, so what happened there wasn't my responsibility. But my shame...accepting it when it wasn't mine...being emotionally affected by being tricked like that....that was my responsibility. Again, detachment is the key. As mentioned, XOXO's just another mine in the minefield...and that was my appointment in dealing with it, then and there, regardless whether I intended it or not. I accept that. Live and learn. I see the edge of the field is a long way away. Sitting imobilized in fear won't do me any good. Gotta keep moving forward, slowly....carefully. I'm gonna misstep and get burned sometimes....sometimes due to my recklessness or indulgence...sometimes due to inexperience...sometimes just because getting burned is the lesson to learn. So be it. No shame.
I agree, forebearance is important...crucial even. But sticking your head in the sand isn't the same thing.