03-24-2011, 12:02 AM
alien wrote:
Sedna wrote:
Touchay. If you notice, I said it is what "I" would do. It wasn't about "you" at all.
Oh, and ps...the 4 Agreements IS new age...Ms pot calling the kettle black. So much for authors having a clue what they are writing about. :-P
You asked for examples of real life stalking. I gave you one. You then proceeded to dismiss everything I had told you about STALKING and tried to turn it into a case for "authenticity", when that wasn't and isn't the issue. You assume that I haven't already tried the sweetness-and-light tactics you then proceed to outline in your response, and say something to the effect that I don't "get it" with regard to what you're talking about. Simply put: I "get it". I merely don't care. Suggest you look into detachment.
You make assumptions that my spouse and I are in disagreement, when the reality is that my spouse is also an impeccable warrior who handles the mother in much the same way as I do - a warrior/stalker/sorcerer who has clearly *seen* that attempting to have meaningful interactions with manipulative tyrants is about as useful as hanging tits on a bull. The seer sees things as they are - not as we might want them to be. Life is short, and there is no time to waste on playing footsies with phantoms. If that's what YOU want to do, then more power to you. I'm sure you're well-liked and always happy. Is that your end game?
You make the comment "You see, cringing everytime you visit this person that is not freedom." This is stated as a fact, and is actually a form of NLP, which you pretended earlier not to understand. Clever, but ultimately transparent. First, I don't cringe and never have. But then, you know nothing about me, so it's easy enough to make assumptions and then present them as facts. I spent the first 15 years of my relationship with my MIL trying to find some sort of common ground, and the bottom line is that a petty tyrant will not ALLOW common ground. By nature, they MUST always have the upper hand. That's what makes them a tyrant. Durh. So, I've spent the LAST 15+ years with total awareness of that, and my relationship with the MIL is better than ever BECAUSE I gave up caring. What that REALLY means is that I am now absolutely FREE to BE authentic and not give a rat's ass one way or the other. I think the problem here is that you have a different definition of "authentic". Being authentic doesn't mean having to speak MY truth all the time. I can quite authentically not care, can quite authentically smile and nod and allow the MIL to have the last word because as a seer and a warrior I wholly know that none of it is going to matter in a million years, or even 20 years. I am free to be detached. My self-importance does not demand that I waste any more time trying to get this woman to like me, when she has made it abundantly clear that she is playing the role of the MIL, which DEMANDS that she not like her offspring's choice of life partner. That is what the role demands, and failure to acknowledge that would be nothing less than foolhardy. She plays her part well and has no desire to get beyond the script, so who am I to rewrite her movie?
As for your jab about The 4 Agreements, I absolutely agree. Pure new age yada. What does THAT have to do with anything? I don't glean my life experience from books but from life. One problem w/ a lot of Toltec forums is that people like to talk about what they've read and what they believe, but when it comes to what they have LIVED... nothing but crickets.
You are obviously reacting to something, I think I will just let you work that out for yourself. Fwiw, if what you were doing with your MIL is stalking, in your mind, then what that other person did was stalking too which would be you saying that Gonzo was right...not that you care, just saying is all. I think that this is what you are reacting to, fwiw.
Sedna wrote:
Touchay. If you notice, I said it is what "I" would do. It wasn't about "you" at all.
Oh, and ps...the 4 Agreements IS new age...Ms pot calling the kettle black. So much for authors having a clue what they are writing about. :-P
You asked for examples of real life stalking. I gave you one. You then proceeded to dismiss everything I had told you about STALKING and tried to turn it into a case for "authenticity", when that wasn't and isn't the issue. You assume that I haven't already tried the sweetness-and-light tactics you then proceed to outline in your response, and say something to the effect that I don't "get it" with regard to what you're talking about. Simply put: I "get it". I merely don't care. Suggest you look into detachment.
You make assumptions that my spouse and I are in disagreement, when the reality is that my spouse is also an impeccable warrior who handles the mother in much the same way as I do - a warrior/stalker/sorcerer who has clearly *seen* that attempting to have meaningful interactions with manipulative tyrants is about as useful as hanging tits on a bull. The seer sees things as they are - not as we might want them to be. Life is short, and there is no time to waste on playing footsies with phantoms. If that's what YOU want to do, then more power to you. I'm sure you're well-liked and always happy. Is that your end game?
You make the comment "You see, cringing everytime you visit this person that is not freedom." This is stated as a fact, and is actually a form of NLP, which you pretended earlier not to understand. Clever, but ultimately transparent. First, I don't cringe and never have. But then, you know nothing about me, so it's easy enough to make assumptions and then present them as facts. I spent the first 15 years of my relationship with my MIL trying to find some sort of common ground, and the bottom line is that a petty tyrant will not ALLOW common ground. By nature, they MUST always have the upper hand. That's what makes them a tyrant. Durh. So, I've spent the LAST 15+ years with total awareness of that, and my relationship with the MIL is better than ever BECAUSE I gave up caring. What that REALLY means is that I am now absolutely FREE to BE authentic and not give a rat's ass one way or the other. I think the problem here is that you have a different definition of "authentic". Being authentic doesn't mean having to speak MY truth all the time. I can quite authentically not care, can quite authentically smile and nod and allow the MIL to have the last word because as a seer and a warrior I wholly know that none of it is going to matter in a million years, or even 20 years. I am free to be detached. My self-importance does not demand that I waste any more time trying to get this woman to like me, when she has made it abundantly clear that she is playing the role of the MIL, which DEMANDS that she not like her offspring's choice of life partner. That is what the role demands, and failure to acknowledge that would be nothing less than foolhardy. She plays her part well and has no desire to get beyond the script, so who am I to rewrite her movie?
As for your jab about The 4 Agreements, I absolutely agree. Pure new age yada. What does THAT have to do with anything? I don't glean my life experience from books but from life. One problem w/ a lot of Toltec forums is that people like to talk about what they've read and what they believe, but when it comes to what they have LIVED... nothing but crickets.
You are obviously reacting to something, I think I will just let you work that out for yourself. Fwiw, if what you were doing with your MIL is stalking, in your mind, then what that other person did was stalking too which would be you saying that Gonzo was right...not that you care, just saying is all. I think that this is what you are reacting to, fwiw.