06-07-2010, 12:00 AM
Yes, its about avoiding it all together. Its one of those easier said than done things, lol, since we learn it, learn how to perpetuate it so we feel quite "close" to it. But still, it's not who we are.
Then the question arises on how to deal with it. My experience is that no one should ever feel bad or ashamed for having a self-important moment. Because that very shame is the opening for the SI in the first place. I think its better we laugh at ourselves in a loving way and know we are not petty, ever. And then we have to feel that same way about other people, that they are not petty. We can just say its the FI and its foreign to us and we intend to be rid of it, but if we get caught...okay, just laugh and know there's a next time and next time to fight again. To me this is the most effective way.
Then the question arises on how to deal with it. My experience is that no one should ever feel bad or ashamed for having a self-important moment. Because that very shame is the opening for the SI in the first place. I think its better we laugh at ourselves in a loving way and know we are not petty, ever. And then we have to feel that same way about other people, that they are not petty. We can just say its the FI and its foreign to us and we intend to be rid of it, but if we get caught...okay, just laugh and know there's a next time and next time to fight again. To me this is the most effective way.