07-24-2005, 12:00 AM
ReRavel:
Well Carlitos, you seem to think that the best you can do is divulge the essence of your life to show us all what has brought you to your current point.
Crow:
Well, there's value in that, to readers, and to me too. I've never tried to imply that this is the best I can do. I think I do my best in other areas, probably, and still do feel that writing on the Internet is a sort of 'pastime'.
ReRavel:
So where are you going?
Crow:
I'm going to die. Well, that's the short answer, isn't it!
ReRavel:
Thats what really matters.
Crow:
To who, you?
ReRavel:
Are you improving as a person by using all that has happened to you to your ultimate advantage or are you using your past as an excuse for not making more of your miserable life?
Crow:
Perhaps you'd offer an example of what you mean by 'improving as a person'.
Perhaps I am 'improving as a person', but I'm not one to judge, being that if I were to try, it couldn't be accomplished without my bein' partial to myself, huh.
I'm letting others just 'be' much more today than ever before, and spending more and more time alone on my own. It may be that doing my best work is done this way. I can get deeply involved in my woodworking or gardening or music without any interaction with other people. And in the case of the woodworking, at least, there's a tangible outcome in the pieces I create, which shall surely have life of their own, and shall be cherished by unknown people perhaps long after I am gone.
ReRavel:
Do you plan to continue on as you have been in a rotting circle of some imaginary nagual leader of mankind?
Crow:
Not really, no. It isn't a 'plan' of mine, more it was an avenue I felt worthy of exploration, and it hasn't been without interesting 'results'. One of which is the insistence of some others to maintain that being nagual is what I'm about, even after I've said I've let that idea go after giving it a 'workout'.
ReRavel:
Thats the thing with you and your history of being some sort of don Juan nagual when all you are isIll leave that for you to answer.
Crow:
Surely what I am doesn't really matter to you. Does it, really? If so, why, how come?
ReRavel:
Honestly look in the mirror of your self-reflection and answer the core question: Are you an example of the problems or the solutions for humanity. If you know in your heart that you are part of the problems then you are living a wasted rot of a life.
Crow:
Well, everyone is a 'part of the problem', if one cares to look at it that way. In the sense that food I consume could feed someone else, for instance. There's evidently a serious problem of overcrowding and overconsumption of what the earth is capable of producing. So I'm surely a part of that problem.
And I've had my part in producing more people, two more, who may likely produce more before I'm gone. So yes, I'm a part of the problem.
As to 'solutions'... Well, in light of the above, you might think I'd advocate suicide, huh. Well, I don't. Not that I'd think it ethical either, to prevent it.
I recently lost a dear friend to suicide, and I'm still rather 'cut up' over that.
I enjoy a simple life. I advocate living such a life. But it isn't a social 'norm' and is therefore complicated, isn't it.
ReRavel:
Hey, you are still alive. That is reason to celebrate for in realms like these it is relatively easy to improve.
Crow:
Some felt the internal combustion engine was a real 'improvement'. Some feel that nuclear power is a real 'improvement'. Leaving these things... would constitute a calamity today, if an entire society were to let them go, or were forced to for economic reasons, say.
Yet I am convinced that to 'improve' we must leave these things. Perhaps there may be 'modifications' that can be made, within the existing framework, but it is this very framework which spells 'death' to society as we've come to know it.
ReRavel:
Once you are dead you can count on being pinned to the point where you were basically at when you died.
Crow:
That is in no way any concern of mine.
ReRavel:
A question of balance between what your life was like for good or evil.
Crow:
I think love is good. I think integration and interaction amongst our fellows is good. Sharing understanding, and ideas and resources is good.
ReRavel:
Are you treating yourself as a sacred being or as disposable item destined for the universal trash dump.
Crow:
I don't know. It sounds like you think you do though...
ReRavel:
From seeing the content of your posts over the years, lie as you may, the answer is self-evident. Your mind deserves better than the trash you are used to habitually thinking and writing and you know it!
Crow:
You're sharing an exchange here with me now. What's 'trashy' about it?
ReRavel:
A mime, eh?
Crow:
I painted my face white for many years on a daily basis and went amongst my fellows in that 'disguise', yes. I've no regrets about that at all!
ReRavel:
One of them there wimps. Hate mimes. Put them all in an imaginary box then throw the box off a cliff.
Crow:
'Hate' is not a good thing. Why do you s'pose a 'mime' is a 'wimp'? I faced a magical life in what I found to be a most appropriately 'magical' way. What sort of life would you have dreamed for me? Or better, what sort of person are you, what have you done with your life, and now, what do you do?
ReRavel:
If you treat yourself as a sacred being and life as a sacred gift you will take full responsibility for the life you have created.
Crow:
I have a responsibility *to* my life, not 'for' it. This life has created me, I have not created it.
ReRavel:
Are you living a wasted life?
Crow:
Could my life have been wasted on me? Is that what you're asking? If so, it smacks of resentment. What would *you* do with my life, or would have done, had you been 'me'?
ReRavel:
Could you do better to prepare for eternity?
Crow:
It's here now. What sort of 'preparation' do you s'pose one can make for something so total and instantaneous?
ReRavel:
We all are and can in one way or another so the question is: Are you using everything that has happened to you to your ultimate advantage or are you slowly rotting away as one of the problems of humanity.
Crow:
I need clarification here in order to even begin to try to answer that question. How might I be 'one of the problems of humanity'?
ReRavel:
As long as you continue to improve as a person you have something to be proud of.
Crow:
Pride comes before a fall, huh. 'All is vanity.'
ReRavel:
If your sons see you next year and they both are surprised by how much stronger and vibrant you have become that will be an improvement indeed! If instead you are slowly rotting awaywell that would be so humanly typical, Mr Great Supposed Nagual Leader.
Crow:
Someone here has a hang-up about 'leadership' and it isn't me...
Well Carlitos, you seem to think that the best you can do is divulge the essence of your life to show us all what has brought you to your current point.
Crow:
Well, there's value in that, to readers, and to me too. I've never tried to imply that this is the best I can do. I think I do my best in other areas, probably, and still do feel that writing on the Internet is a sort of 'pastime'.
ReRavel:
So where are you going?
Crow:
I'm going to die. Well, that's the short answer, isn't it!
ReRavel:
Thats what really matters.
Crow:
To who, you?
ReRavel:
Are you improving as a person by using all that has happened to you to your ultimate advantage or are you using your past as an excuse for not making more of your miserable life?
Crow:
Perhaps you'd offer an example of what you mean by 'improving as a person'.
Perhaps I am 'improving as a person', but I'm not one to judge, being that if I were to try, it couldn't be accomplished without my bein' partial to myself, huh.
I'm letting others just 'be' much more today than ever before, and spending more and more time alone on my own. It may be that doing my best work is done this way. I can get deeply involved in my woodworking or gardening or music without any interaction with other people. And in the case of the woodworking, at least, there's a tangible outcome in the pieces I create, which shall surely have life of their own, and shall be cherished by unknown people perhaps long after I am gone.
ReRavel:
Do you plan to continue on as you have been in a rotting circle of some imaginary nagual leader of mankind?
Crow:
Not really, no. It isn't a 'plan' of mine, more it was an avenue I felt worthy of exploration, and it hasn't been without interesting 'results'. One of which is the insistence of some others to maintain that being nagual is what I'm about, even after I've said I've let that idea go after giving it a 'workout'.
ReRavel:
Thats the thing with you and your history of being some sort of don Juan nagual when all you are isIll leave that for you to answer.
Crow:
Surely what I am doesn't really matter to you. Does it, really? If so, why, how come?
ReRavel:
Honestly look in the mirror of your self-reflection and answer the core question: Are you an example of the problems or the solutions for humanity. If you know in your heart that you are part of the problems then you are living a wasted rot of a life.
Crow:
Well, everyone is a 'part of the problem', if one cares to look at it that way. In the sense that food I consume could feed someone else, for instance. There's evidently a serious problem of overcrowding and overconsumption of what the earth is capable of producing. So I'm surely a part of that problem.
And I've had my part in producing more people, two more, who may likely produce more before I'm gone. So yes, I'm a part of the problem.
As to 'solutions'... Well, in light of the above, you might think I'd advocate suicide, huh. Well, I don't. Not that I'd think it ethical either, to prevent it.
I recently lost a dear friend to suicide, and I'm still rather 'cut up' over that.
I enjoy a simple life. I advocate living such a life. But it isn't a social 'norm' and is therefore complicated, isn't it.
ReRavel:
Hey, you are still alive. That is reason to celebrate for in realms like these it is relatively easy to improve.
Crow:
Some felt the internal combustion engine was a real 'improvement'. Some feel that nuclear power is a real 'improvement'. Leaving these things... would constitute a calamity today, if an entire society were to let them go, or were forced to for economic reasons, say.
Yet I am convinced that to 'improve' we must leave these things. Perhaps there may be 'modifications' that can be made, within the existing framework, but it is this very framework which spells 'death' to society as we've come to know it.
ReRavel:
Once you are dead you can count on being pinned to the point where you were basically at when you died.
Crow:
That is in no way any concern of mine.
ReRavel:
A question of balance between what your life was like for good or evil.
Crow:
I think love is good. I think integration and interaction amongst our fellows is good. Sharing understanding, and ideas and resources is good.
ReRavel:
Are you treating yourself as a sacred being or as disposable item destined for the universal trash dump.
Crow:
I don't know. It sounds like you think you do though...
ReRavel:
From seeing the content of your posts over the years, lie as you may, the answer is self-evident. Your mind deserves better than the trash you are used to habitually thinking and writing and you know it!
Crow:
You're sharing an exchange here with me now. What's 'trashy' about it?
ReRavel:
A mime, eh?
Crow:
I painted my face white for many years on a daily basis and went amongst my fellows in that 'disguise', yes. I've no regrets about that at all!
ReRavel:
One of them there wimps. Hate mimes. Put them all in an imaginary box then throw the box off a cliff.
Crow:
'Hate' is not a good thing. Why do you s'pose a 'mime' is a 'wimp'? I faced a magical life in what I found to be a most appropriately 'magical' way. What sort of life would you have dreamed for me? Or better, what sort of person are you, what have you done with your life, and now, what do you do?
ReRavel:
If you treat yourself as a sacred being and life as a sacred gift you will take full responsibility for the life you have created.
Crow:
I have a responsibility *to* my life, not 'for' it. This life has created me, I have not created it.
ReRavel:
Are you living a wasted life?
Crow:
Could my life have been wasted on me? Is that what you're asking? If so, it smacks of resentment. What would *you* do with my life, or would have done, had you been 'me'?
ReRavel:
Could you do better to prepare for eternity?
Crow:
It's here now. What sort of 'preparation' do you s'pose one can make for something so total and instantaneous?
ReRavel:
We all are and can in one way or another so the question is: Are you using everything that has happened to you to your ultimate advantage or are you slowly rotting away as one of the problems of humanity.
Crow:
I need clarification here in order to even begin to try to answer that question. How might I be 'one of the problems of humanity'?
ReRavel:
As long as you continue to improve as a person you have something to be proud of.
Crow:
Pride comes before a fall, huh. 'All is vanity.'
ReRavel:
If your sons see you next year and they both are surprised by how much stronger and vibrant you have become that will be an improvement indeed! If instead you are slowly rotting awaywell that would be so humanly typical, Mr Great Supposed Nagual Leader.
Crow:
Someone here has a hang-up about 'leadership' and it isn't me...