01-09-2018, 12:00 AM
watergaze wrote:
I hear you when you say your bends have brought you here. I think to my past illness sometimes and how I should be grateful for having it because it brought me to shamanism and whatnot. But why carry it with me past that point? Why not let go of the bends that made me ill? What is the point of dragging them with me just cause it might be scary to change?
But, given your bends do not affect you in ways that make you ill and such... it might be different for you.
Funny when you say you are so critical of people. I see you conversing with and trying out things from all sorts of people and often you are more attracted to the troublemaker kind (like here at the site I mean where I can see you)
. But, well, let's face it those people are often more fun... for a while at least...
Oh yes, I do believe it is important what place your actions come from. I do wish that good intentions made more of a difference and not pave the way to hell, as they say
. So, for me it is the goal to come from a place of good that is not soo greatly linked to those good intentions that lead to hell. There is a place of still good intentions but one that is like more impersonal. Still... 'tis a work in progress. Hope no one ends in hell. Fingers crossed 
Start fixing one bend and all the other bends begin to line up, eh? I view it as we're all working on something to enhance ourselves, in some way, constantly. Yet, I find I'm pretty happy with my place in life. So the things I'm working on aren't necessarily self-improvement focused, but more project focused. Example, I might care more about working out if I'm traveling to a primitive location where I'm expected to endure more labor intensive activities. On the other hand, if I'm working at a desk most of my day, I would enhance mental acuity. I do these things because they're beneficial to an objective, but I don't do them to fix a bend. If there's a purpose to fixing a bend, I'll fix a bend. If there's no purpose, then I let the bend sit because it's not doing any harm. You sound like you want to fix a bend because that makes the most sense for you and it makes you feel good. Those are also good reasons to fix a bend
The people you see me engaging at the site, lol. Sorcery is a very special situation and there are some special circumstances regarding the people I choose to engage that are outside of what I'm comfortable talking about openly. Let's just say, appearances are often deceiving and what you're seeing has a lot history and backstory involved in it that makes it particularly exciting for me to engage. So while you see above the surface, know there are lots of tangled roots underground that I'm also engaging. Let's just say, it's complicated.
With regard to Hell, I'm very fond of dark places. That's one of my bends. I'm too familiar with the uglier sides of people. So when you say you hope no one goes there--I live there. Not physically, but I spend most of my awake time focusing on the darker places of humanity. Not in some morbid obsession (I think), but it's like chefs. Chefs think about food often because they work with them often. I have the pleasure of working with not very nice people often. That sort of mentality, energy, and overall awareness rubs off. Imagine how different the mindset of a kindergarten teacher and a homicide detective would be. Engaging any reality on a regular basis shifts the AP and it's really difficult to shift out of that for someone who has been committed to doing whatever it is they do. Those who are very efficient at what they do have likely built up a lot of experience and sometimes, having a lot of experience with bad people leads to serious bends in the personality. The kindergarten teacher would be excited to share, interact, and engage people on a normal basis (generally speaking). The homicide detective would isolate himself in his work and be reasonably mistrustful of people.
Sometimes the bends exist because of what we love. If I form a bend as a result of helping people escape dark places, I'm more than okay with that. Psychologists are deeply aware of the darkness the psyche can possess. Too much of that immersion and it can become a struggle to wash out all the inhumane deeds people commit against one another. Some of it is really horrible to even be aware of its existence. So, maybe I should change what I love to do to straighten out my bends.... but that would mean leaving people alone in their darkness and I'm not okay with that yet. Anyway, yes, I agree people probably should work on any bends they want to work on. I've just chosen to keep some bends as it's sort of a requirement of loving people. I would rather love people and risk having bends than not loving them and being bend free. I'm weird, I know. Tho I think many of us make similar sacrifices for those we care for.
I hear you when you say your bends have brought you here. I think to my past illness sometimes and how I should be grateful for having it because it brought me to shamanism and whatnot. But why carry it with me past that point? Why not let go of the bends that made me ill? What is the point of dragging them with me just cause it might be scary to change?
But, given your bends do not affect you in ways that make you ill and such... it might be different for you.
Funny when you say you are so critical of people. I see you conversing with and trying out things from all sorts of people and often you are more attracted to the troublemaker kind (like here at the site I mean where I can see you)
. But, well, let's face it those people are often more fun... for a while at least...Oh yes, I do believe it is important what place your actions come from. I do wish that good intentions made more of a difference and not pave the way to hell, as they say
. So, for me it is the goal to come from a place of good that is not soo greatly linked to those good intentions that lead to hell. There is a place of still good intentions but one that is like more impersonal. Still... 'tis a work in progress. Hope no one ends in hell. Fingers crossed Start fixing one bend and all the other bends begin to line up, eh? I view it as we're all working on something to enhance ourselves, in some way, constantly. Yet, I find I'm pretty happy with my place in life. So the things I'm working on aren't necessarily self-improvement focused, but more project focused. Example, I might care more about working out if I'm traveling to a primitive location where I'm expected to endure more labor intensive activities. On the other hand, if I'm working at a desk most of my day, I would enhance mental acuity. I do these things because they're beneficial to an objective, but I don't do them to fix a bend. If there's a purpose to fixing a bend, I'll fix a bend. If there's no purpose, then I let the bend sit because it's not doing any harm. You sound like you want to fix a bend because that makes the most sense for you and it makes you feel good. Those are also good reasons to fix a bend
The people you see me engaging at the site, lol. Sorcery is a very special situation and there are some special circumstances regarding the people I choose to engage that are outside of what I'm comfortable talking about openly. Let's just say, appearances are often deceiving and what you're seeing has a lot history and backstory involved in it that makes it particularly exciting for me to engage. So while you see above the surface, know there are lots of tangled roots underground that I'm also engaging. Let's just say, it's complicated.
With regard to Hell, I'm very fond of dark places. That's one of my bends. I'm too familiar with the uglier sides of people. So when you say you hope no one goes there--I live there. Not physically, but I spend most of my awake time focusing on the darker places of humanity. Not in some morbid obsession (I think), but it's like chefs. Chefs think about food often because they work with them often. I have the pleasure of working with not very nice people often. That sort of mentality, energy, and overall awareness rubs off. Imagine how different the mindset of a kindergarten teacher and a homicide detective would be. Engaging any reality on a regular basis shifts the AP and it's really difficult to shift out of that for someone who has been committed to doing whatever it is they do. Those who are very efficient at what they do have likely built up a lot of experience and sometimes, having a lot of experience with bad people leads to serious bends in the personality. The kindergarten teacher would be excited to share, interact, and engage people on a normal basis (generally speaking). The homicide detective would isolate himself in his work and be reasonably mistrustful of people.
Sometimes the bends exist because of what we love. If I form a bend as a result of helping people escape dark places, I'm more than okay with that. Psychologists are deeply aware of the darkness the psyche can possess. Too much of that immersion and it can become a struggle to wash out all the inhumane deeds people commit against one another. Some of it is really horrible to even be aware of its existence. So, maybe I should change what I love to do to straighten out my bends.... but that would mean leaving people alone in their darkness and I'm not okay with that yet. Anyway, yes, I agree people probably should work on any bends they want to work on. I've just chosen to keep some bends as it's sort of a requirement of loving people. I would rather love people and risk having bends than not loving them and being bend free. I'm weird, I know. Tho I think many of us make similar sacrifices for those we care for.