04-01-2012, 12:00 AM
Ran across this in an old file on my hard drive - something I scribbled down a few years back as a result of a round robin discussion about the double. Was encouraged by Spirit to post it, so... apologies for the length and unedited nature of it, but... sometimes raw is better. Heh.
_________________
March 26, 2007
(Comments & notes to myself, culled from a chat room conversation)
I think one reason so many of us are drawn to the Toltec path is because we do know - from the intuitive level of silent knowing - that there is a "way" to retain our awareness and inhabit the totality of ourselves after our physical bodies run out of juice. I am acutely aware of things I believe, and yet I would have to honestly say that my understanding/experience of the double goes well beyond just a belief system. I cannot say that I know the entire process of what happens to us after we "die", but the gnosis which comes directly from the double creates a "synapse" of energy/awareness which is not unlike having one "self" here in this world, and the other "self" already in the nagual - which is probably why THE EAGLE'S GIFT resonated with me on such a profound level. For myself, it's not just something I "believe", it's who I am.
Granted, that is purely subjective. 100%. Maybe it will seem like only a "belief", but I can say with certainty that what I have experienced of the double comes from an aspect of myself that is nowhere near the same as my belief, for example, that the sun will rise tomorrow. The awareness is experienced in a different way, and in an entirely different "part" of the energy body.
While my "directions" may be off (can't really remember), people who make a living reading body language say that when a person is telling the truth, they may tend to look up and to the right - they are accessing the actual memory banks of the physical brain, calling down the hard drive, so to speak. OTOH, when the person is creating a fiction, they will look up and to the left, accessing the creative brain/mind. My experience of both TRWTL and gnosis come from whatever aspect of the self has Knowledge - the hard drive of experience. My belief that the sun will rise tomorrow, or that the car will start up so I can drive to work... come from the creative/belief aspect.
Again, wholly acknowledged as 100% subjective... but that's okay by me because I know and trust who I am. So... *heh* I know what I believe, I believe what I choose, and I know what I simply and silently know.
***
In my experience, the double CAN remain entirely "within" the existing humanform, or it can essentially bi-locate anywhere/anywhen in the manifestation of the multi-verse. As an aside, this is how I see so-called "past lives" - not other bodies or other times we have inhabited, but other positions of our own assemblage point, experienced & recorded by the double. At times (such as Dreaming or intense journeys with power plants) one may actually shift the "human" (mortal") awareness into the AP of the double - and there is a sudden influx of awareness/experience/knowledge to which we do not have access in ordinary awareness.
What I've determined (and others are free to disagree) is that the whole purpose of this "double" - which is comprised of energy and awareness, but which MAY become manifest if there is sufficient reason (as Genaro's double often did), is that it creates an energetic "mirror" of sorts which MAY serve as a point of reference and/or a point of perception for our awareness following the death of the physical form.
Again, difficult concept that does not yield easily to a few words. What it boils down to for me is that the mortal self is like the egg in which awareness gestates (and grows, through experience & nurturing), and the double is the infinite and eternal configuration which is not limited by humanform concerns into which our awareness "hatches". The double is the super-position of the assemblage point - i.e., once the double is sufficiently dreamed by the warrior, it is everywhere and nowhere, and all that would be required for it to manifest would be intent and focus.
Because the double is ubiquitous, it has access to the all - knowledge, awareness, information - and it may serve as guide/mentor to the human self in the manner that don Juan referred to as "the double is now dreaming you." The sufficiently developed double becomes the teacher/benefactor, though this may even occur at a level where the mortal/earthly warrior isn't really aware of it until some time later, if ever. I've long felt that DJM was Carlos's double, but by the time CC figured it out, there was simply no way he could have explained it to "the world at large" through his books. He gave some hints, I felt, but that's another story for another time.
***
For me, activating the nagual was a naturally-occurring process beginning when I was a little girl. I suspect it's that way for most of us, but we either lose touch with it when we get caught up in "real life" somewhere in our teen years, or... ? I also think that's why a lot of people go through the shamanic awakening process - often without having any real idea what's happening to them. The nagual provides many windows of opportunity throughout our lifetime. It's whether we choose to open the window or run from it that determines how we experience life (and perhaps how we experience infinity as well... who's to say?)
***
Perhaps part of learning HOW to assemble otherworlds involves moving the AP into that "space" while we are still alive - the practice & maneuvering which goes beyond mere intellectual understanding. Through the use of certain power plants or other manipulations of awareness (the sundance comes to mind, as well as the NDE), the mind is able to see into other "spaces" and learns how to navigate what is there and to create what it most desires (or in other cases, what it most fears). Ideally, I think these experiences are incredible Dreaming tools - by shifting the AP away from the tonal, we are forced to use the creative/godforce aspects of our mind to create otherworlds.
I've always felt that IF the stories of Jesus are in any way "true", he was a shaman who figured it out and actually put it into practice - but the world has been screwed up ever since because people insist on believing something of such magnitude could be done FOR them. *gotta laugh* Also agreed that it IS in the doing that our mind/body/spirit learns the HOW. Intellectual grokking may be part of our assimilation of knowledge in the tonal, but it is no substitute for experience.
I've watched a lot of older people (and some younger ones) go through the conundrum of fear with regard to what comes after death, my mother being the most recent. As far as that "clinging to beliefs", I have wondered at times if this is one way in which the person is trying to "assemble otherworlds", to put it in Toltec terms - and there is no way we can know to what extent they are successful or not. Re the NDE, for example, if these people really do see a long line of dead relatives waiting for them "in the light", my guess (and it's just a guess) is that the person herself has assembled her MEMORY of those loved ones and that this is some form of attempt to people her "otherworld" with familiar faces, warmth, and unconditional love. I mean - who's to say WE aren't all living in a purely manufactured "reality" right now - the Matrix comes to mind.
Point being... I do think some of the comfort beliefs elders cling to may be purely "instinctual" on some level - an attempt to create/manifest something for themselves beyond the physical shell which they perceive is near death. Since it seems to be an almost universal issue (in all cultures across the board), it may be a purely human instinct as opposed to something resulting from our humanform belief systems.
No way to know. So we live impeccably (do our best) and create as we go.
_________________
March 26, 2007
(Comments & notes to myself, culled from a chat room conversation)
I think one reason so many of us are drawn to the Toltec path is because we do know - from the intuitive level of silent knowing - that there is a "way" to retain our awareness and inhabit the totality of ourselves after our physical bodies run out of juice. I am acutely aware of things I believe, and yet I would have to honestly say that my understanding/experience of the double goes well beyond just a belief system. I cannot say that I know the entire process of what happens to us after we "die", but the gnosis which comes directly from the double creates a "synapse" of energy/awareness which is not unlike having one "self" here in this world, and the other "self" already in the nagual - which is probably why THE EAGLE'S GIFT resonated with me on such a profound level. For myself, it's not just something I "believe", it's who I am.
Granted, that is purely subjective. 100%. Maybe it will seem like only a "belief", but I can say with certainty that what I have experienced of the double comes from an aspect of myself that is nowhere near the same as my belief, for example, that the sun will rise tomorrow. The awareness is experienced in a different way, and in an entirely different "part" of the energy body.
While my "directions" may be off (can't really remember), people who make a living reading body language say that when a person is telling the truth, they may tend to look up and to the right - they are accessing the actual memory banks of the physical brain, calling down the hard drive, so to speak. OTOH, when the person is creating a fiction, they will look up and to the left, accessing the creative brain/mind. My experience of both TRWTL and gnosis come from whatever aspect of the self has Knowledge - the hard drive of experience. My belief that the sun will rise tomorrow, or that the car will start up so I can drive to work... come from the creative/belief aspect.
Again, wholly acknowledged as 100% subjective... but that's okay by me because I know and trust who I am. So... *heh* I know what I believe, I believe what I choose, and I know what I simply and silently know.
***
In my experience, the double CAN remain entirely "within" the existing humanform, or it can essentially bi-locate anywhere/anywhen in the manifestation of the multi-verse. As an aside, this is how I see so-called "past lives" - not other bodies or other times we have inhabited, but other positions of our own assemblage point, experienced & recorded by the double. At times (such as Dreaming or intense journeys with power plants) one may actually shift the "human" (mortal") awareness into the AP of the double - and there is a sudden influx of awareness/experience/knowledge to which we do not have access in ordinary awareness.
What I've determined (and others are free to disagree) is that the whole purpose of this "double" - which is comprised of energy and awareness, but which MAY become manifest if there is sufficient reason (as Genaro's double often did), is that it creates an energetic "mirror" of sorts which MAY serve as a point of reference and/or a point of perception for our awareness following the death of the physical form.
Again, difficult concept that does not yield easily to a few words. What it boils down to for me is that the mortal self is like the egg in which awareness gestates (and grows, through experience & nurturing), and the double is the infinite and eternal configuration which is not limited by humanform concerns into which our awareness "hatches". The double is the super-position of the assemblage point - i.e., once the double is sufficiently dreamed by the warrior, it is everywhere and nowhere, and all that would be required for it to manifest would be intent and focus.
Because the double is ubiquitous, it has access to the all - knowledge, awareness, information - and it may serve as guide/mentor to the human self in the manner that don Juan referred to as "the double is now dreaming you." The sufficiently developed double becomes the teacher/benefactor, though this may even occur at a level where the mortal/earthly warrior isn't really aware of it until some time later, if ever. I've long felt that DJM was Carlos's double, but by the time CC figured it out, there was simply no way he could have explained it to "the world at large" through his books. He gave some hints, I felt, but that's another story for another time.
***
For me, activating the nagual was a naturally-occurring process beginning when I was a little girl. I suspect it's that way for most of us, but we either lose touch with it when we get caught up in "real life" somewhere in our teen years, or... ? I also think that's why a lot of people go through the shamanic awakening process - often without having any real idea what's happening to them. The nagual provides many windows of opportunity throughout our lifetime. It's whether we choose to open the window or run from it that determines how we experience life (and perhaps how we experience infinity as well... who's to say?)
***
Perhaps part of learning HOW to assemble otherworlds involves moving the AP into that "space" while we are still alive - the practice & maneuvering which goes beyond mere intellectual understanding. Through the use of certain power plants or other manipulations of awareness (the sundance comes to mind, as well as the NDE), the mind is able to see into other "spaces" and learns how to navigate what is there and to create what it most desires (or in other cases, what it most fears). Ideally, I think these experiences are incredible Dreaming tools - by shifting the AP away from the tonal, we are forced to use the creative/godforce aspects of our mind to create otherworlds.
I've always felt that IF the stories of Jesus are in any way "true", he was a shaman who figured it out and actually put it into practice - but the world has been screwed up ever since because people insist on believing something of such magnitude could be done FOR them. *gotta laugh* Also agreed that it IS in the doing that our mind/body/spirit learns the HOW. Intellectual grokking may be part of our assimilation of knowledge in the tonal, but it is no substitute for experience.
I've watched a lot of older people (and some younger ones) go through the conundrum of fear with regard to what comes after death, my mother being the most recent. As far as that "clinging to beliefs", I have wondered at times if this is one way in which the person is trying to "assemble otherworlds", to put it in Toltec terms - and there is no way we can know to what extent they are successful or not. Re the NDE, for example, if these people really do see a long line of dead relatives waiting for them "in the light", my guess (and it's just a guess) is that the person herself has assembled her MEMORY of those loved ones and that this is some form of attempt to people her "otherworld" with familiar faces, warmth, and unconditional love. I mean - who's to say WE aren't all living in a purely manufactured "reality" right now - the Matrix comes to mind.
Point being... I do think some of the comfort beliefs elders cling to may be purely "instinctual" on some level - an attempt to create/manifest something for themselves beyond the physical shell which they perceive is near death. Since it seems to be an almost universal issue (in all cultures across the board), it may be a purely human instinct as opposed to something resulting from our humanform belief systems.
No way to know. So we live impeccably (do our best) and create as we go.