Seeing the Foreign Installation

[Bob May]

"Now when he was in Jerusalem at the passover, in the feast day, many believed in his name, when they saw the miracles which he did.


But Jesus did not commit himself unto them, because he knew all men, And needed not that any should testify of man: for he knew what was in man."




I have always thought that these verses refer to the ability to see what mankind harbors behind the flesh. Just beneath the physical and psychic parts of
ourselves. "..he knew all men.." and "..he knew what was in man."




We all have this ability to one extent or another, really, but do not wish to admit it to ourselves.




As a young boy, having grown up with a father who was an alcoholic, I noticed at some point in time that my father was different at times. Not just a mood or
different behavior, but a different person. A certain animal-like glaze would cover the sheen of his eyes and he would act like someone else. Sometimes I refer
to that glaze as "no one's home." It was as if I had two fathers and I would only have to look in his eyes as he came up the driveway to know
which one came home that evening.


But my terminology is not quite correct.


I also saw his eyes after he died. For some reason unknown to me, or perhaps for my benefit, the hospital staff failed to close his eyes before calling my
family to view his body. That was indeed the look of "no one's home." There is no mistaking the look of death. There is no need to take a pulse.


It is something completely different in appearance than life.


But the glazed look that I related to his drinking I have seen many times in many different people. Other alcoholics, videos of shaman while practicing their
magic and practitioners of voodoo while in their trances. This glaze in the eyes has always told me that indeed someone or something IS home, but that they are
not the rightful tenants.




Seeing is a feeling and it is written in peoples faces. We have all experienced this faculty to one degree or another.


We can ignore it, run from it as I think most people do. Or we can pay closer attention to it, and in so doing, encourage this faculty to grow.

[Blue totem]

Yes, sometimes the eyes can be a scary site. You see light, love, darkness, hate, in the eyes. The eyes are truly a way to ones spirit. You where talking about
voodoo in your post. Yes it can be a scary site, the adepts go into trances where they drool. And it looks like their eyes are covered with a thin
yellowish-grayish membrane. And in the center of the eyes, a thick fleshy iris, with no life.




I knew a person that literally had sparks of hatred coming out of her eyes, yes a woman. She sometimes had a ray of dark anger come out. I could see a dark,
stupid energy inside her. It was a rancid, fowl energy. She was a rancid and fowl spirit. I think she had been in prison. Her eyes made quite an impression on
me. I didn`t know females could be like that.




Sometimes I could see ''****'' in her eyes. Like if the energy of her lower bowls came out in her eyes. I had never seen that before. It was a
scary site.

[Hawkeye Crow]

Bob May , you have focused on the very thing that led me to what I am about in the present. Again, I restate what I said when LW asked me about FI. Cataneda
called it a foreign mind. I expand on this , with help from what I read , as false ideas or beliefs which come from many sourcses, which , from Carlos , start
with the baby and the parents.




My Mother was the beginning source of my own false ideas ,and that was reinforced by the 'collective' society or mind. Several things opened me up .
Those TV ads about child abuse were a start. I thought , HEY! that's me. And , where I had been accepting blame for my supposed failures,as other people
accused , I began to realize that I was caught in something that I did not choose. My Father , of course , supported my Mother , and never reconciled with me
before his death. Something in me knew that Mother was dangerous. I left in 1969 , and never saw her again , although she tried to recapture me using various
legal means.




In 1990 , I met and lived with a woman which I stayed with for 12 years. I became a part of her extended family. A very Abusive family , as it turned out. She
was exactly like your description of your Father. I thought it was alcoholism but it was much worse , a she was also a prescription drug user and doctor
shopper. One difference was that when really high , she only saw those she hated. I took many blows as someone other than who I was. Her two sons and I
thought it was schizophrenia and may be it was.




When all this ended , I began to explore what had led me into such a mess. First, I was an enabler. Secondly , I had acted from the Law of Attraction, using
the negative , to draw someone into my life that was a lesson in total negativity , and , from Castaneda , self-pity and indulgence. I began to realize the
action and re-action that had led me to this place. I began to see the depth of my self-hatred. It was there all along.




There is so much I could say about this to the point of exhaustion. It has been behind most serious posts I have ever put on these sites. I went into various
religious teachings , most Christian oriented. I will not deny that I learned useful things, although I am not about those things , now.




A woman friend gave me a book which has been as informative to me as anything I can recall , although it was primarily meant for Women with abusive partners.
It described the , shall we call it black magic , that those with no Personal Power , the author used those words , will use to maintain control over others.
The idea is that a person can not reason these things out. That love , forgiveness , intellect , what have you , has no effect whatsoever. Some suggestions
were given for how to at least put a stop to the abuse. Of course , we all know that it can increase to violent levels. Then , the only solution is to leave
or perhaps die.




Does it bother you as much as it bothers me when someone you knows talks about "I could kill...." Oh yeah , they say it's just an expression. I
don't buy it.




The book was (as it is out of print-I got a used copy from www.powells.com) ,
"The Verbally Abusive Relationship " , by Patricia Evans , a counselor in San Francisco , California. She can be found at www.verbalabuse.com Get it if you can and spread it around.




I close with the mention that some on this forum, no sense naming names , were engaged in verbal abuse disguised as spiritual progress. I do not deny that I
played along for awhile , as my insult reflex was grabbed for awhile. That goes for Sustained Reaction as well. If some want to accuse (isn't Satan
called the accuser?) and blame, my choice , as I said to them , is to go elsewhere.




Control is not a choice. Being available to Spirit or mystery or infinity or whatever , is. You cannot petition the Lord with prayer-Jim Morrison

[Hawkeye Crow]

To add some context, I want to admit that I am the Naive sort. Ever read that tale about how Juan Matus was chosen by the Nagual? How he was shot for dead by
the strawboss? Well, I have to make an effort to know that this world is 20 times worse than that , and the behavior of humans can be truly perverted and
ugly. Some call it reptilian , but I don't like to blame animals for the schemes of human beings. It took me 50 years to admit that the universe is
predatory; that people are NOT basically good. Original sin? That doesn't get to the heart of things!




Take care , be careful , use your impeccability.

[Hawkeye Crow]

There is a minority in the USA that has suspicions about Vaccinations , experimentation on soldiers and others. There are some doubts about the sources of the
911 Twin Towers attack. Or even the JFK , RFK, MLK assinations. I am leaning in the direction of these 'tin hat conspircy nuts' with every day that
passes. It is posibble that some of these things were responsible for the behavior of our relatives. What do you think , Bob May and anyone else? Nuclear
bomb tests in the 1950's? What do we not know? Are there sources of FI that we do not know , imposed by FORCE?

[Bob May]

"It is posibble that some of these things were responsible for the behavior of our relatives. What do you think , Bob May and anyone else? "




The nasty behavior of our relatives and us and mankind as a whole stems from the carnal mind (the mind that puts more stock in appearances than reality) and
demonic influence.


It is the nature of this plane we are in. We don't belong here.


We are all victims of the same enemies and the only chance we have is to recognise it and fight it.


Human beings are capable of the greatest heights and lowest lows.


My intent was not to start a pity party, but to point out that we all have a capability to "see" at a very low level. Why not use it to foster our
growth instead of our feeling victimized.


I used my father as an example of my first glimses of something other than the material awareness.


Truth is I loved my father and told him so near the end and also told him I was sorry that I was not a better son. His reply was "You have nothing to be
sorry for." There were two sides to him and one was merely too weak to fight the forces working against him. That is all. He was not a good man and not an
evil man. He was just a man.




Better in my opinion to use whatever level of "seeing" that we can use to accentuate the positive. Look for the good in people.


If we look we will see it. Look in the eyes of a child and wonder at the innocence and lack of gui;le staring back at us.


Have compassion on those too weak to fight the forces allied against mankind. Use the stories of those who have lost the battle to strengthen your resolve and
help you to avoid the same mistakes.




Attune yourself to higher things and you will reap higher things. It is all vibration and harmonics.


Too much talk about fliers. It is a necessary knowledge but we should not dwell in it too long.


It explains our past many times, but let the past be.


Those who don't know history are doomed to repeat it, but those who dwell in the past even more so.

[Guest]