08-20-2015, 12:02 AM
So here it is: I am not really getting a sense of being worthless; I am not at all ashamed; I have not been acute with conceptual self-negation these days. I would give you the impression that 'I think' I am God-like (laughing).
The truth is if you chatted with me on Ixtlan, you would sense my initial awkwardness. I am not imposing, and oppositely feel timid sometimes. I am not insecure though {compartively (as I perceive)}
The concepts I put forth may or may not be 'valuable,' though I DO believe they are valid in their entirety. I am relatively happy and have no sense of lack in any respect imagineable. {Well, OKAY.. I'd like to have a ten inch dick in a few instances (not that I'm small /////// must protect my ego > smile)}
Why do I write? (I don't know really).......
The thing is, "being decisional," seems to have been paramount for me. I was NOT an individual who could "choose" and stand by my "choices." I had a role model who had fashioned himself oppositely, and I knew his words to do something could be depended on. Literally, he would have to be dead not to keep them. (I have NEVER known anyone else like that) He also was expansive about creating separation for objectivity, so that one could be really present to life, even in dire situations where others would normally evade responsibility. He occasionally elaborated on being in the fire, deathground, and spirituality.
I slowly absorbed a few of the characteristics. I know that they are tested and of proven value in my own life.
The truth is if you chatted with me on Ixtlan, you would sense my initial awkwardness. I am not imposing, and oppositely feel timid sometimes. I am not insecure though {compartively (as I perceive)}
The concepts I put forth may or may not be 'valuable,' though I DO believe they are valid in their entirety. I am relatively happy and have no sense of lack in any respect imagineable. {Well, OKAY.. I'd like to have a ten inch dick in a few instances (not that I'm small /////// must protect my ego > smile)}
Why do I write? (I don't know really).......
The thing is, "being decisional," seems to have been paramount for me. I was NOT an individual who could "choose" and stand by my "choices." I had a role model who had fashioned himself oppositely, and I knew his words to do something could be depended on. Literally, he would have to be dead not to keep them. (I have NEVER known anyone else like that) He also was expansive about creating separation for objectivity, so that one could be really present to life, even in dire situations where others would normally evade responsibility. He occasionally elaborated on being in the fire, deathground, and spirituality.
I slowly absorbed a few of the characteristics. I know that they are tested and of proven value in my own life.

