09-30-2015, 12:03 AM
serloco "It is self-awareness that one needs, to see and observe the energy forms you are aligning to reality in your AP. When you see this you can see it form and know that you are forming it...I have it boiled down to choice of awareness."
A few days ago my wife was to order a pizza for me to pick up near to where I was. I remind her to be sure she called the right location. There is no pizza ordered when I arrive, and I find that she has ordered from a place on the other side of town. I am furious of course, but quickly find equanimity. I will not get angry at how stupid my wife is; I'll convert this to relational leverage credit.
Not even twenty fours later she is contemptuously yelling at me about yardwork, and I don't have an iota reserve of patience for this (so much for imagined credit). So, I return plenty of hostile temperment. So she reverts to the weapon of coldness and sexual denial. Nevertheless, I find enough space in the dread and negativity to not feel a critical mass over my head. I am more patient, and not panicky. {after I write this, I neatly get a foot back in the door a day later}.
I say this because I can clarify something about detachment and conditions. Clearly I show a preference for favorable relational conditions. However, in all of my preferences is the choice of how I am aware. Thus, the conditions are irrelevant in so far as I focus on my point (base) of projection rather than a situation. Again I am emphasizing that if you want to change the world or your 'self' > FORGET IT! NOTE {this no longer applies once you can reach the place of indifference; then, you CAN change the world and yourself}
The de-personalized look is what matters, even as you watch things get royally fucked up by your own actions. And deeper and deeper you need to go into the place of indifference. You must practice this when situations such as I relate happen.
Humbling recapitulation and an abasing compunction that you feel moves through your heart is a trustworthy way to remove self import that conflicts with your better interests to stay objective.
A few days ago my wife was to order a pizza for me to pick up near to where I was. I remind her to be sure she called the right location. There is no pizza ordered when I arrive, and I find that she has ordered from a place on the other side of town. I am furious of course, but quickly find equanimity. I will not get angry at how stupid my wife is; I'll convert this to relational leverage credit.
Not even twenty fours later she is contemptuously yelling at me about yardwork, and I don't have an iota reserve of patience for this (so much for imagined credit). So, I return plenty of hostile temperment. So she reverts to the weapon of coldness and sexual denial. Nevertheless, I find enough space in the dread and negativity to not feel a critical mass over my head. I am more patient, and not panicky. {after I write this, I neatly get a foot back in the door a day later}.
I say this because I can clarify something about detachment and conditions. Clearly I show a preference for favorable relational conditions. However, in all of my preferences is the choice of how I am aware. Thus, the conditions are irrelevant in so far as I focus on my point (base) of projection rather than a situation. Again I am emphasizing that if you want to change the world or your 'self' > FORGET IT! NOTE {this no longer applies once you can reach the place of indifference; then, you CAN change the world and yourself}
The de-personalized look is what matters, even as you watch things get royally fucked up by your own actions. And deeper and deeper you need to go into the place of indifference. You must practice this when situations such as I relate happen.
Humbling recapitulation and an abasing compunction that you feel moves through your heart is a trustworthy way to remove self import that conflicts with your better interests to stay objective.