billy's basic detachment practice

[serloco]

Thanks billy. sighs. pivks up head and thinks better things will come. i need to get outta this town. one more month left i think here, then its off to another happier city for me. trully i have been more healthy then usual and getting back some power but i have been hovering in mundania and feeling low and weak.. the sick man made me feel worse too. that and whenever i say or think about healing people they send in sick people like they are manufacturing their sick forms and it makes me hate them instead ofloving them. when does the desire to heal create sick people? sick fuckers. i was to heal only if i need to heal someone if there is honestly someone who needs healing. i dont want to heal people for my sick pleasure. i hate this world sometimes. but i was sad and felt alone tonight and i said you know what if people loved me they would show me some love and then a catr drive by and people hollered out at me lovingly and waved at me and sent me nice energy and smiles. and so it was a lil warmth in the cold. feels nicer. i wish i coulod go back in time and change things. i wish i never learned about iobs and arftificial like life forms. fake life. acts and plays. i am tired of the lies billy and the games and the shams. and the judgments and tyhe moving iobs and humans. moving and having to move things.. i am so tired of telling people what to be and how to be and how to act and why to act and what to feel and when to feel and why etc and i just wish people couold be normal and just love naturally.