((( Stronger, Healthier, Happier and Overflowing With Abundant Prosperity!! )))

[Don Genardo Sacateca]

Good evening ladies,
gentlemen and whatever else may be in the room. Welcome to the club
Rasputin. I'll be your host tonight: the lovable Dick Dork. All my
friends call me 'Dick' and all my enemies call me 'Dork'. What can I
say? It's better to be controversial than to have no publicity at all.
So
I sez to the guy, I sez, "If you're gonna sell me this junk the least
you can do is guarantee it!" and the guy sez, "Okay, okay, I'll
guarantee it" and so I paid him the money and asked,
"Well?"
"Well what?"
"Well, where's my guarantee?"
and he sez
"Hey, I guarantee...it's junk!"
Let
me tell you, if is wasn't for the six Mafia hitmen sittin in the room
with nothing to do

I would have said something YOU BET I WOULD HAVE!!!