10-30-2017, 12:00 AM
watergaze wrote:
"Pixie wrote:It's why I can't hate Wolf. He was broken at a young age (as he says) and had no one to help him besides a particular form of shamanism. It kept him alive. He plays games with people to "test" them because that's what Carlos said stalkers do. Wolf is committed to a particular form of shamanism and that's his passion, that's what satisfied him. Though after reading his history he wrote, it's clear that his psyche was split and it remained split. It's not even his fault. He is a product of a society that is spiritually ignorant.
I am careful not to summarize people into these kinds of narratives. I do not think it can do them justice plus I have seen many people be wrong in what they say when summarizing. I have not read these things that you refer to, so I cannot say if this is true or not.
The narrative is one he wrote if you read his section. You might refrain from summarizing people into the narratives he writes, but consider for a moment that he authored himself. He chose to see reality as a place that he didn't feel he could control, and so he exerted control over it. Someone who feels safe doesn't go to the lengths he has to protect himself. Consider the paranoia he exhibited. The power and authority to announce who was or was not a nagual. If you're interested in knowing where I pulled these self-drawn conclusions he's made about himself, I can link you to those articles. He's written excessively about himself, others, and the world. He was good about documenting himself and talking, at length, about things he was passionate about. He's a fascinating individual.
"Pixie wrote: WG consider why you were brought in. Wolf was wise and could see, he is spiritually aware. That awareness wasn't supported by a shaman and so he had to teach himself. When we dance close to the edge of awareness, our minds have the potential to slip into that abyss. If we know we're entering a fall, we save the things we care about. Sorcery was Wolf's life. He gave it to someone who would treat it well, in the spirit he intended. That was you, girl. You're special. Special because you genuinely care about others and are intellectually competent.
I think LW has given this place many years and he was already old and wanted to put attention on a specific thing outside of the internet as well as prepare for his final journey. He gave this place to me, so to speak, because I am not a powerhungry mongrel. Lol. But no really... its very silly indeed I know... Plus the fact that I am consistent and reliable has been a plus because many people are not to some website on the www and hence cannot take care of it.
True, LW is old and his attention was drawn elsewhere... or was it? You assume he's not here because he's not using the account you associate him with. You have no validation as to whether or not he is here under an alias. He may or he may not be. Lol, did he really give the site to you for the reason you mention? What might that say about the others who were present at that time? I don't think Sen was very power hungry, nor do I think Silverwind is either. There were other factors that influenced his decision. Reliability and consistency aren't reasons. Silverwind is extremely consistent and has demonstrated more of a presence than you have. Moreover, SilverWind hasn't deviated from her presentation of character for YEARS. She is very careful with preserving her persona. You, on the other hand, have often been shifted significantly by your emotions. Not that this is bad, I'm also shifted by my emotions. As is Sen and others. To be shifted is to have authenticity in ones exchanges. Anyway, I would say Wolf chose you because you can dream, stalk, are authentic, and care about people. You care enough to reach out to people and those people are few and far between.
I am a nobody
Lies. You are most certainly a somebody.
This is what infuriated some... "Why is she the one who admins this place and not 'me'. She is a nobody, Im a somebody
. I could make such a great use of this hub/place" (well, 'Somebody, why did you not take care of the place? I can tell you why because it was beneath Somebody to aid LW, they want to be their own boss).
Lol. Yeah. I can see that argument being made. I'm so glad I wasn't around when that drama occurred. Then again, I quite enjoy a good popcorn fest. I don't know though, did you really aid LW? I mean, his original intent was focused on developing death defiers. His frequency was mysterious, dark, and magical. You're quite the opposite I sorta view this as him hoping to expand his horizons and to embrace a new perspective, I mean, it was clear what you brought to the table: logic and reason, with a dash of magic. He couldn't have chosen a more different person from himself lol.
Simply too big egos/self-importance to allow others into the foreground?
Quality leaders know how to shift. Foreground, background, and mid-ground should all be positions held at some time or another. Depending upon the needs of the group.
I will rather stay a nobody, thank you very much. Though being an admin here has ruined my nobody vibe - now I gotta fight battles I find for the most part ridiculous and unworthy of my time and attention (and some that are). - but maybe that is good for me too... 
.
Growth comes in many shades. Life is like gaming, if you notice your enemies are tougher to beat (internal and external ones) then it means you're heading in the right direction. You could stop challenging yourself and remain happy, ignorant, and stagnant in life One day I hope to live in the middle of nowhere, away from everyone, and just tread-water until I die. Once I'm done with all this other **** Being shifted helps everyone to develop themselves. It's not the smartest or most talented who succeed in life; it's the person who is most resilient to change and can adapt that makes the largest strides. You've been pushed into some sh*tty situations, and came out on the other side. That's what's most important.
I want to note that I think there are wonderful shamans out there in the world. But they would not come here to take care of this place. They got much more important things to do in the world. And, let's face it, most of them are not very friendly with the internet.
True Though, I've met a handful of people who've shown me magic (shaman-esque) and they're excessively familiar with the internet They just don't believe in religion or shamanism. They believe in being kind toward others. The magic of loving others can be profoundly powerful. Good people transcend stereotypes and can be found anywhere. Shamans are often outdated hippies who haven't adapted to a changing society. Not all shamans, mind you. There are some who are heart-centered, but they are not the majority.
"Pixie wrote:So I think about the people like Wolf and how the mental health system failed him.
again, I would not jump to conclusions.
It's not a jump to conclusions. The mental health field is atrocious. I've read and written at-length on the issues with the mental health field. The success rate for addiction treatment is embarassingly low. It's awful what mental health professionals are currently able to provide to people experiencing mental illness. Wolf had some serious issues (that I can elaborate on based on the current model of psychological health and wellness, should you desire). Honestly, people generally aren't taught how to achieve and maintain mental wellness. There are no courses in high school to teach people how to care for themselves. The education system is focused on academics, but not mental wellness. Mental wellness only enters the picture when dysfunction arises. The majority of adults don't learn how to balance their lives in a healthy manner, but part of this issue is that there's no real place within society where these things are taught. Until there's enough dysfunction to warrant seeing a mental health professional, people don't really learn about what it means to care for oneself. The mental health system has failed the majority.
"Pixie wrote: How humanity failed him. How there are so many like him out there. Society judges the mentally ill because they don't understand them.
How is LW mentally ill?
We can discuss this if you genuinely want a thorough analysis. I can't just summarize in a paragraph what's eating Wolf. It would be pages of analysis to explain Wolf. It would also be somewhat personal and maybe intrusive to openly discuss him. If you want to set up a private forum speficially for this, I'm willing to discuss Wolf with you.
"Pixie wrote: Yet here you are, hanging out with a group of borderline mentally ill individuals and trying to make sense out of it. It's easy to see our calling when we look at the patterns we've held. How we've invested our time and energy reveals where our heart resides. Consider your passion and your calling. You've been doing it for a long time now.
(You know, in case you were contemplating purpose and direction xD )
Lol I guess I need it spelled out more. I understand (or feel) people because I am an empath (or maybe try not to because of it). I also understand a lot because I have gone through stuff myself. If I can heal and emerge from the fringes so can you. Cause, again, I am a nobody. And let's hope so are you haha. The more self-importance one has the worse for them: "Oh I am so special in my suffering.... so so special." In a certain sense, like I wrote above, to me most people are bordeline mentally ill. The way they explode in anger, the way they become mean to others under pressure, the way they become jealous and insecure... etc. The way they say that is who they are and think that is who they have to continue to be.
Lol, Wolf would laugh at what you said. You claim to be a nobody, but holding various APs is the goal. Perfection is an illusion and people are limitless in their expression. Sometimes, how we judge how everyone else should behave reveals a lot about our own inward judgements we hold. For example, you mention people being borderline mentally ill for how they are mean to others, jealous, or insecure. I think it's mentally ill of people to believe that everyone shouldn't be these things. Technically, mental illness must have dysfunction component. Hypothetically, one could be mean, jealous, or insecure and still be functional (meaning far from having a mental illness). Everyone starts somewhere and expecting people to be ideal members of society is silly. It's normal for people to be imperfect in various ways. To expect others to arrange themselves to fit within my version of the world is naive. The world is what it is and the only thing I can control is my response. Hence, people don't have to fit my preference for how they should behave; but when they don't, then I'm allowed to engage them from my preference. (Which might appear crazy to some.)
Point is, no one cares what you think about them. Your judgement of how others should behave reveal the idealism you hold toward yourself. The standards you set for yourself are behavior-based. However, what happens when the internal doesn't match the external? Dissonance. That can manifest in a myriad of conditions. Life is more than behavior. How we think/feel must align with how we live (behavior) to achieve mental wellness.
Part of a shamans journey is to heal. In order to heal one has to have stuff to heal. If there is nothing to heal then we are screwed. Rejoice that you got issues hahaha. And then HEAL .
Lol. Everyone has a lot they could heal if they look deep enough. The most dangerous point to be at is to suffer without realizing there are issues. Denial is something many on the warriors path attempt to side-step. It is far easier to tell someone else to heal than it is to heal oneself. That brings up a good topic of how to hold space for others to heal. Non-judgment and openness to exploration are great tactics to employ. I can think of many who I would be willing to heal myself in front of... sadly, none of them are at Sorcery at this time. It takes an open heart to hold a space for others to heal themselves. Shamanka did well in these areas for a long time. Quantum Shaman was very authentic in this regard. Mornings Son was a tricky little beast, but he held a space for me when I required it. I could probably ramble off a few more names who have been present for me at one time or another It's nice when people do that for others. Like, I will never forget the kindness that some have provided me to help me along in my journey. No one can offer that space 100% of the time for others, because self-care is important too. But when we have the ability to hold a space for another, we should give that gift. Gifts of toys and money are great, but they can't hold a flame to holding spaces for others to heal. Gift giving should move beyond materialism--but for those still learning how to give of the self, toys and money are welcomed.
I did a lot of healing with Wolf and my good ole pal Alan. They both held spaces for me to go deeper within myself, to reflect on my own values and morals, and when given the opportunity to protect them... I took it. Many believe revenge is a dish best served cold, but that's a dish I prefer to skip. There's enough ugliness in the world and I've seen enough to make me not want to take part in certain flavors. I love them both because they freed a fragment of my spirit. I met parts of myself I didn't know existed--and those were the parts I desperately needed to discover. People who push us the most are often those who have the most to offer. The gift our adversaries bring us is ultimately self-acceptance. Shamanism teaches us that to be free of the perspectives of others, allows us true freedom.
Where's my JJ at these days? JJ, you gave good gifts too Didn't want to leave you out of this little summary. Not as good as Wolf, but pretty darn close.
I wish Wolf would come back. It's always the crazy ones who totally understand other crazies. I've met no one crazier, more loyal, and honest than Wolf. He had a special spiritual aroma that I never found elsewhere. He's crazier than I am and that's downright impressive.
"Pixie wrote:It's why I can't hate Wolf. He was broken at a young age (as he says) and had no one to help him besides a particular form of shamanism. It kept him alive. He plays games with people to "test" them because that's what Carlos said stalkers do. Wolf is committed to a particular form of shamanism and that's his passion, that's what satisfied him. Though after reading his history he wrote, it's clear that his psyche was split and it remained split. It's not even his fault. He is a product of a society that is spiritually ignorant.
I am careful not to summarize people into these kinds of narratives. I do not think it can do them justice plus I have seen many people be wrong in what they say when summarizing. I have not read these things that you refer to, so I cannot say if this is true or not.
The narrative is one he wrote if you read his section. You might refrain from summarizing people into the narratives he writes, but consider for a moment that he authored himself. He chose to see reality as a place that he didn't feel he could control, and so he exerted control over it. Someone who feels safe doesn't go to the lengths he has to protect himself. Consider the paranoia he exhibited. The power and authority to announce who was or was not a nagual. If you're interested in knowing where I pulled these self-drawn conclusions he's made about himself, I can link you to those articles. He's written excessively about himself, others, and the world. He was good about documenting himself and talking, at length, about things he was passionate about. He's a fascinating individual.
"Pixie wrote: WG consider why you were brought in. Wolf was wise and could see, he is spiritually aware. That awareness wasn't supported by a shaman and so he had to teach himself. When we dance close to the edge of awareness, our minds have the potential to slip into that abyss. If we know we're entering a fall, we save the things we care about. Sorcery was Wolf's life. He gave it to someone who would treat it well, in the spirit he intended. That was you, girl. You're special. Special because you genuinely care about others and are intellectually competent.
I think LW has given this place many years and he was already old and wanted to put attention on a specific thing outside of the internet as well as prepare for his final journey. He gave this place to me, so to speak, because I am not a powerhungry mongrel. Lol. But no really... its very silly indeed I know... Plus the fact that I am consistent and reliable has been a plus because many people are not to some website on the www and hence cannot take care of it.
True, LW is old and his attention was drawn elsewhere... or was it? You assume he's not here because he's not using the account you associate him with. You have no validation as to whether or not he is here under an alias. He may or he may not be. Lol, did he really give the site to you for the reason you mention? What might that say about the others who were present at that time? I don't think Sen was very power hungry, nor do I think Silverwind is either. There were other factors that influenced his decision. Reliability and consistency aren't reasons. Silverwind is extremely consistent and has demonstrated more of a presence than you have. Moreover, SilverWind hasn't deviated from her presentation of character for YEARS. She is very careful with preserving her persona. You, on the other hand, have often been shifted significantly by your emotions. Not that this is bad, I'm also shifted by my emotions. As is Sen and others. To be shifted is to have authenticity in ones exchanges. Anyway, I would say Wolf chose you because you can dream, stalk, are authentic, and care about people. You care enough to reach out to people and those people are few and far between.
I am a nobody
Lies. You are most certainly a somebody.
This is what infuriated some... "Why is she the one who admins this place and not 'me'. She is a nobody, Im a somebody
. I could make such a great use of this hub/place" (well, 'Somebody, why did you not take care of the place? I can tell you why because it was beneath Somebody to aid LW, they want to be their own boss).Lol. Yeah. I can see that argument being made. I'm so glad I wasn't around when that drama occurred. Then again, I quite enjoy a good popcorn fest. I don't know though, did you really aid LW? I mean, his original intent was focused on developing death defiers. His frequency was mysterious, dark, and magical. You're quite the opposite
I sorta view this as him hoping to expand his horizons and to embrace a new perspective, I mean, it was clear what you brought to the table: logic and reason, with a dash of magic. He couldn't have chosen a more different person from himself lol. Simply too big egos/self-importance to allow others into the foreground?
Quality leaders know how to shift. Foreground, background, and mid-ground should all be positions held at some time or another. Depending upon the needs of the group.
I will rather stay a nobody, thank you very much
. Though being an admin here has ruined my nobody vibe - now I gotta fight battles I find for the most part ridiculous and unworthy of my time and attention (and some that are). - but maybe that is good for me too... .Growth comes in many shades. Life is like gaming, if you notice your enemies are tougher to beat (internal and external ones) then it means you're heading in the right direction. You could stop challenging yourself and remain happy, ignorant, and stagnant in life
One day I hope to live in the middle of nowhere, away from everyone, and just tread-water until I die. Once I'm done with all this other **** Being shifted helps everyone to develop themselves. It's not the smartest or most talented who succeed in life; it's the person who is most resilient to change and can adapt that makes the largest strides. You've been pushed into some sh*tty situations, and came out on the other side. That's what's most important. I want to note that I think there are wonderful shamans out there in the world. But they would not come here to take care of this place. They got much more important things to do in the world. And, let's face it, most of them are not very friendly with the internet
.True
Though, I've met a handful of people who've shown me magic (shaman-esque) and they're excessively familiar with the internet They just don't believe in religion or shamanism. They believe in being kind toward others. The magic of loving others can be profoundly powerful. Good people transcend stereotypes and can be found anywhere. Shamans are often outdated hippies who haven't adapted to a changing society. Not all shamans, mind you. There are some who are heart-centered, but they are not the majority. "Pixie wrote:So I think about the people like Wolf and how the mental health system failed him.
again, I would not jump to conclusions.
It's not a jump to conclusions. The mental health field is atrocious. I've read and written at-length on the issues with the mental health field. The success rate for addiction treatment is embarassingly low. It's awful what mental health professionals are currently able to provide to people experiencing mental illness. Wolf had some serious issues (that I can elaborate on based on the current model of psychological health and wellness, should you desire). Honestly, people generally aren't taught how to achieve and maintain mental wellness. There are no courses in high school to teach people how to care for themselves. The education system is focused on academics, but not mental wellness. Mental wellness only enters the picture when dysfunction arises. The majority of adults don't learn how to balance their lives in a healthy manner, but part of this issue is that there's no real place within society where these things are taught. Until there's enough dysfunction to warrant seeing a mental health professional, people don't really learn about what it means to care for oneself. The mental health system has failed the majority.
"Pixie wrote: How humanity failed him. How there are so many like him out there. Society judges the mentally ill because they don't understand them.
How is LW mentally ill?
We can discuss this if you genuinely want a thorough analysis. I can't just summarize in a paragraph what's eating Wolf. It would be pages of analysis to explain Wolf. It would also be somewhat personal and maybe intrusive to openly discuss him. If you want to set up a private forum speficially for this, I'm willing to discuss Wolf with you.
"Pixie wrote: Yet here you are, hanging out with a group of borderline mentally ill individuals and trying to make sense out of it. It's easy to see our calling when we look at the patterns we've held. How we've invested our time and energy reveals where our heart resides. Consider your passion and your calling. You've been doing it for a long time now.
(You know, in case you were contemplating purpose and direction xD )
Lol I guess I need it spelled out more. I understand (or feel) people because I am an empath (or maybe try not to because of it). I also understand a lot because I have gone through stuff myself. If I can heal and emerge from the fringes so can you. Cause, again, I am a nobody. And let's hope so are you haha. The more self-importance one has the worse for them: "Oh I am so special in my suffering.... so so special." In a certain sense, like I wrote above, to me most people are bordeline mentally ill. The way they explode in anger, the way they become mean to others under pressure, the way they become jealous and insecure... etc. The way they say that is who they are and think that is who they have to continue to be.
Lol, Wolf would laugh at what you said. You claim to be a nobody, but holding various APs is the goal. Perfection is an illusion and people are limitless in their expression. Sometimes, how we judge how everyone else should behave reveals a lot about our own inward judgements we hold. For example, you mention people being borderline mentally ill for how they are mean to others, jealous, or insecure. I think it's mentally ill of people to believe that everyone shouldn't be these things. Technically, mental illness must have dysfunction component. Hypothetically, one could be mean, jealous, or insecure and still be functional (meaning far from having a mental illness). Everyone starts somewhere and expecting people to be ideal members of society is silly. It's normal for people to be imperfect in various ways. To expect others to arrange themselves to fit within my version of the world is naive. The world is what it is and the only thing I can control is my response. Hence, people don't have to fit my preference for how they should behave; but when they don't, then I'm allowed to engage them from my preference. (Which might appear crazy to some.)
Point is, no one cares what you think about them. Your judgement of how others should behave reveal the idealism you hold toward yourself. The standards you set for yourself are behavior-based. However, what happens when the internal doesn't match the external? Dissonance. That can manifest in a myriad of conditions. Life is more than behavior. How we think/feel must align with how we live (behavior) to achieve mental wellness.
Part of a shamans journey is to heal. In order to heal one has to have stuff to heal. If there is nothing to heal then we are screwed
. Rejoice that you got issues hahaha. And then HEAL .Lol. Everyone has a lot they could heal if they look deep enough. The most dangerous point to be at is to suffer without realizing there are issues. Denial is something many on the warriors path attempt to side-step. It is far easier to tell someone else to heal than it is to heal oneself. That brings up a good topic of how to hold space for others to heal. Non-judgment and openness to exploration are great tactics to employ. I can think of many who I would be willing to heal myself in front of... sadly, none of them are at Sorcery at this time. It takes an open heart to hold a space for others to heal themselves. Shamanka did well in these areas for a long time. Quantum Shaman was very authentic in this regard. Mornings Son was a tricky little beast, but he held a space for me when I required it. I could probably ramble off a few more names who have been present for me at one time or another
It's nice when people do that for others. Like, I will never forget the kindness that some have provided me to help me along in my journey. No one can offer that space 100% of the time for others, because self-care is important too. But when we have the ability to hold a space for another, we should give that gift. Gifts of toys and money are great, but they can't hold a flame to holding spaces for others to heal. Gift giving should move beyond materialism--but for those still learning how to give of the self, toys and money are welcomed.I did a lot of healing with Wolf and my good ole pal Alan. They both held spaces for me to go deeper within myself, to reflect on my own values and morals, and when given the opportunity to protect them... I took it. Many believe revenge is a dish best served cold, but that's a dish I prefer to skip. There's enough ugliness in the world and I've seen enough to make me not want to take part in certain flavors. I love them both because they freed a fragment of my spirit. I met parts of myself I didn't know existed--and those were the parts I desperately needed to discover. People who push us the most are often those who have the most to offer. The gift our adversaries bring us is ultimately self-acceptance. Shamanism teaches us that to be free of the perspectives of others, allows us true freedom.
Where's my JJ at these days? JJ, you gave good gifts too
Didn't want to leave you out of this little summary. Not as good as Wolf, but pretty darn close. I wish Wolf would come back. It's always the crazy ones who totally understand other crazies. I've met no one crazier, more loyal, and honest than Wolf. He had a special spiritual aroma that I never found elsewhere. He's crazier than I am and that's downright impressive.