Hope

[serloco]

Yes, I agree totally in what you say. That is how I have made so many powerful allies. By being true to my heart and offering solutions and gifts of power by sharing the secrets I have found freely. However, on the flip side, that is also how I made my biggest mistakes I regret. For God says it best in the Bible when He says "Do not give your precious food to dogs and swines, for they will only devour all your food and then devour you right after". I have made the most powerful enemies by sharing with people carelessly. I was naive in thinking everyone would be good and respect me. These days I am careful who I give to and make sure I see their spirit clearly for what it is before giving so generously.

I do like to give and share freely, as that is who I am, kind and loving. I seek love and respect, and loyalty in return although I do not demand it. I found by not forcing people into roles but instead allowing them to be who they are and who they want to be has given me the greatest allies. Infinity is diverse and I cant expect the same outcome from every single person out there. People are different and that is a great thing.

I am glad you appreciated my comment on power and desire for happiness. I wondered if you would think I am challenging you and am glad you didnt perceive me that way. Speaking of power I just want to add that the true power is infinite and thus has no limits. Why not make power, and the experience of having power, the most glorious and joyful experience we can make it to be? The only limitations we have are the ones we set for ourselves which i call, ore accurately, wards and not limitations.

[serloco]

I will leave the decision up to you. I understand why you dont want Billy in this thread.

[Guest]

I should point out that I made my initial post when I was feeling pretty bummed. Now that I'm less bummed (nothing regarding you, you've been a very pleasant distraction xD), I very much appreciate what you said about being able to be in power while desiring happiness. There's certainly a human component to power. By the way, I know what you mention about shifting too far. You wind up very detached from the tonal which makes life more a struggle. It's fascinating to read you've been there too.

Jokes are what I use too, in order to re-ground myself. That's interesting we both appreciate that. I suppose if we've been seen the other side then we understand most everything which occurs here in the tonal is humorous--I mean, it's so petty on the tonal side of life. The nagual would find that very humorous I'm glad you went the funny route. I've admired that trait in JJ too. Being able to laugh is one of my greatest joys--a reminder that life doesn't have to be so heavy.

I wanted to answer your initial inquiry you asked me previously. The way to attract those who are loyal to you are to serve them. If you offer people tonal gifts to be your friend (physical gifts or energetic gifts such as attention) then that's one sort of engagement. Now, if you give spiritual gifts that's where the better forms of loyalty reside. To be served, one must serve. To serve others, even for the most powerful, indicates a humbleness and respect for another. The spirit knows who is serving us and responds in kind. Not everyone will be capable of returning to us what we provide to them. We shouldn't expect to receive. We give where we can and do what we can afford--we respect ourselves so that we can serve everyone. That's when gifts settle deeper. You gain loyalty with powerful allies by being one for others. Many serve the self and while that offers one form of power--others sense this spiritual intent either consciously or subconsciously.

[serloco]

Yes, I agree totally in what you say. That is how I have made so many powerful allies. By being true to my heart and offering solutions and gifts of power by sharing the secrets I have found freely. However, on the flip side, that is also how I made my biggest mistakes I regret. For God says it best in the Bible when He says "Do not give your precious food to dogs and swines, for they will only devour all your food and then devour you right after". I have made the most powerful enemies by sharing with people carelessly. I was naive in thinking everyone would be good and respect me. These days I am careful who I give to and make sure I see their spirit clearly for what it is before giving so generously.

I do like to give and share freely, as that is who I am, kind and loving. I seek love and respect, and loyalty in return although I do not demand it. I found by not forcing people into roles but instead allowing them to be who they are and who they want to be has given me the greatest allies. Infinity is diverse and I cant expect the same outcome from every single person out there. People are different and that is a great thing.

I am glad you appreciated my comment on power and desire for happiness. I wondered if you would think I am challenging you and am glad you didnt perceive me that way. Speaking of power I just want to add that the true power is infinite and thus has no limits. Why not make power, and the experience of having power, the most glorious and joyful experience we can make it to be? The only limitations we have are the ones we set for ourselves which i call, ore accurately, wards and not limitations.

[Guest]

It's interesting what you mention about giving knowledge to dogs and swines. My dad has a decent knowledge base and since I was 10 years old he would continuously tell me, "Never give anyone 100% of your knowledge. You give half, then you see what they do with it. If they turn on you, then you stop teaching them." I never thought I would need that advice until I reached my 20s Then in my 30s I figured I grew more by giving 100% because if I got snickerdoodled then I would be forced to either die or grow. The risk was higher, so it was more exciting for me to give 100% Likely not the ideal method of growing. These days I give around 50% as a max. Not because I like to withhold information, but because people don't want more than that.

In terms of being respected, it's nice to want and hope for that, but it's another thing to receive it. We can't control what others do, we're restricted to mastering ourselves. Which means, if people are inappropriate for us then we should shift away from them. If those same people later become appropriate then we can shift back In a way, I think that's what you and I have done. We feuded and stalked one another. Yet, here we are today. In all fairness, I recognized we were very similar in approach--we just differed in interpretation and application, but those deviances were minor. Once we each shifted toward one another, we're able to have enjoyable conversations (well, I consider these enjoyable I don't know how you feel).

I don't think you're challenging me any longer. I mean, you do challenge me in ways I enjoy--but not in ways I find annoying. You've changed your approach to meet me halfway and you see my individuality and adjust yourself to accommodate me. I appreciate that gesture, so I do the same in return. I agree, if we're going to be infinite beings, why not enjoy ourselves. It's just a matter of discovering what it is which brings us the most joy.

What are you working on right now which you're open to discussing?

Right now I'm working on slowing down I'm also working on trying to manage my tonal (my spirit could use the rest). If you have any advice on how to move slower, I could use it! Actually, I'm studying for my yoga instructor license--so ideally that has all the knowledge I require to slow down. On the other hand, I've been whizzing through that stuff. I'm uncertain if it's possible to slow down. There's so much momentum within my spirit that I'm convinced I'm incapable of slowing down xD Seriously, I stop to smell the roses and I still inhale, see the beauty, immerse myself in the moments and feel them. Then I'm done within a few seconds. Perhaps you have something to share to help me understand what it is I'm supposed to be doing when I slow down?

[serloco]

Well I am a firm believer that one can accomplish anything. Even controlling people. I used to be a master at it. I think i mentioned how it all backfired on me and once I let that knowledge out I began also getting controlled. Not something I practice anymore for obvious reasons. You get what you give in life. However that brings me to what I am working on. I am working on banishing mind control techniques and domination practices. I think that the knowledge you have about not being able to control someone is much better then the knowledge I have about being able. It creates no way in. I spend every day fighting to regain control over my mind. It is a winning battle however and I am creating shields now and blockers, and curses on my mind to ward out evil intrusions. It is coming along good and I foresee heavenly skies in my future.

Slowing down is a good idea. For myself it comes along well with the realization that there is always more then meets the eye. Stopping to silence ourselves, our internal chattering, and taking a good look at everything around us can do this for me. When I break my routines and intend to expand awareness it helps for me to slow down. Also I am someone of a time lord. Knowledge of time, perception of time, is the key that hold control over time. I can slow time down around me while thinking inside myself. I can think on time and bend it to my will. Its not something difficult to learn and is a worthwhile pursuit. Things we say about time like "time flies when we are having fun" all create the experience we have of time. Just keep in mind that the experience of time, much like anything else, can become fluid and change. Time is a great teacher and ally is you befriend it. It is wise to make every moment count. That realization when rolled around and pondered on just may give you the intent you need to really "stop and smell the roses".

Yes I do enjoy our conversations. And I agree we have each adapted to suit one another. You no longer get under my skin 'so to speak'.

I am lucky in that I have undergone extreme hardship in my life. Pure agony and pain for long terms. I learned to wield pain and befriend it. Wield fear and befriend it. Over time I learned not just to enjoy the great miracles in my life but take great pleasure in the small things as well. I now enjoy peace of mind, however brief that can be, and make the most out of the average ways of life. I know now that extreme hardship merely expands our love of the small things, and enhances the experience of joy and life.

[Guest]

serloco wrote:I know now that extreme hardship merely expands our love of the small things, and enhances the experience of joy and life.
Yeah.  It sort of sucks how that works.  Obviously everyone suffers--it's just to what degree do people differ.  If I hadn't of suffered, I wouldn't know the joys I need in my life.  In fact, I wouldn't even need joy.  I only know joy because I've known sadness.  I only know loyalty because I've met betrayal.  I only know love because I met hate.  Without something to compare, I would remain ignorant.  Would I rather be ignorant and not know pain--or would I rather know pain and pursue joy.  Such crappy choices  

Breaking routines is a great suggestion to slow time.  I've known that as breaking patterns, but I can't always identify MY patterns.  I can see patterns in others just fine though  To be fair, I prefer to run from personal closeness with others.  That frightens me.  I've had many bad experiences associated with personal closeness.  A few at this site, in fact.  Elias123 was declared (can't recall if he was self-declared or NLW declared) a Nagual when I first met him.  I PMed, that night we had a shared dream (this is when I didn't know sharing dreams was a thing yet).  After this he brought me into his inner circle.  A few months later he declared me evil and ejected me from the group.  I'm trying to remember what I did.  I think I wasn't behaving appropriately, that sounds pretty accurate.  I didn't care enough about him is what it boiled down to.  I'm sure there are some logs of that somewhere around the site.  I was removed from RF.  Some time later I was to come back into RF (forget why).  Elias told Wolf I wasn't allowed back.  Wolf ignored Elias and let me back Anyway.  My pattern seems to involve befriending people who later decide they don't want me because I'm not giving them what they expect me to give them.  I've never intentionally tried to piss those people off either.  After the first few times I realized being close to people hurts me when they decide I'm not.... appropriate.  Perhaps that's why I'm so quick, if I remain in one place for too long then I get hurt.  If I move fast enough, people can't keep up.  They can't hurt me because I'm no longer around to be hurt lol.  

You bring up a fair point--to make every moment count.  I do stop to smell the roses, I just need three seconds instead of three hours.

Also, you mention shields, blocks, and curses to ward out evil intrusions.  I realize religion often pushes the concept of evil, but I personally wonder if evil is real.  Instead of blocking "evil" thoughts, you could opt to understand what is driving you to act, then find another way to meet that same need; one which doesn't hurt others.  If you deny the experience, those denials often slip through the cracks and somewhat haunt the mind.  If you address them then you can eliminate them.  Mastery, then elimination over your thoughts instead of only eliminating your thoughts.  If you don't understand why you're having those thoughts then the pattern will continue to repeat in new ways.  I'm currently trying to spot my own patterns.  Running seems to be my most obvious pattern.  Yet I run to avoid upsetting people.  I upset people by being myself, by accidentally walking into their sensitive spots.  Then all hell breaks loose.  I don't know how to fix that pattern of mine.  I've been avoiding closeness to stop that pattern.  When I do allow closeness, I run into the same issue of stumbling into sensitive spots and then I'm chased with pitchforks this tells me I need to find closeness with people who accept my "evil" xD Rather, I need to be around a different type of people.  I don't know how to find those people either.  I mean, I found you.  You seem very open to my limitations of being.  Glance and Sen have also been pretty open about my inadequacies.  Others too have tolerated me well enough.  Needless to say, it's been a tough pattern to break.  For now, I suppose avoiding personal closeness is the best method to stop the pattern--but being alone all the time sort of sucks lol.

[Guest]

It's interesting what you mention about giving knowledge to dogs and swines. My dad has a decent knowledge base and since I was 10 years old he would continuously tell me, "Never give anyone 100% of your knowledge. You give half, then you see what they do with it. If they turn on you, then you stop teaching them." I never thought I would need that advice until I reached my 20s Then in my 30s I figured I grew more by giving 100% because if I got snickerdoodled then I would be forced to either die or grow. The risk was higher, so it was more exciting for me to give 100% Likely not the ideal method of growing. These days I give around 50% as a max. Not because I like to withhold information, but because people don't want more than that.

In terms of being respected, it's nice to want and hope for that, but it's another thing to receive it. We can't control what others do, we're restricted to mastering ourselves. Which means, if people are inappropriate for us then we should shift away from them. If those same people later become appropriate then we can shift back In a way, I think that's what you and I have done. We feuded and stalked one another. Yet, here we are today. In all fairness, I recognized we were very similar in approach--we just differed in interpretation and application, but those deviances were minor. Once we each shifted toward one another, we're able to have enjoyable conversations (well, I consider these enjoyable I don't know how you feel).

I don't think you're challenging me any longer. I mean, you do challenge me in ways I enjoy--but not in ways I find annoying. You've changed your approach to meet me halfway and you see my individuality and adjust yourself to accommodate me. I appreciate that gesture, so I do the same in return. I agree, if we're going to be infinite beings, why not enjoy ourselves. It's just a matter of discovering what it is which brings us the most joy.

What are you working on right now which you're open to discussing?

Right now I'm working on slowing down I'm also working on trying to manage my tonal (my spirit could use the rest). If you have any advice on how to move slower, I could use it! Actually, I'm studying for my yoga instructor license--so ideally that has all the knowledge I require to slow down. On the other hand, I've been whizzing through that stuff. I'm uncertain if it's possible to slow down. There's so much momentum within my spirit that I'm convinced I'm incapable of slowing down xD Seriously, I stop to smell the roses and I still inhale, see the beauty, immerse myself in the moments and feel them. Then I'm done within a few seconds. Perhaps you have something to share to help me understand what it is I'm supposed to be doing when I slow down?

[serloco]

Well I am a firm believer that one can accomplish anything. Even controlling people. I used to be a master at it. I think i mentioned how it all backfired on me and once I let that knowledge out I began also getting controlled. Not something I practice anymore for obvious reasons. You get what you give in life. However that brings me to what I am working on. I am working on banishing mind control techniques and domination practices. I think that the knowledge you have about not being able to control someone is much better then the knowledge I have about being able. It creates no way in. I spend every day fighting to regain control over my mind. It is a winning battle however and I am creating shields now and blockers, and curses on my mind to ward out evil intrusions. It is coming along good and I foresee heavenly skies in my future.

Slowing down is a good idea. For myself it comes along well with the realization that there is always more then meets the eye. Stopping to silence ourselves, our internal chattering, and taking a good look at everything around us can do this for me. When I break my routines and intend to expand awareness it helps for me to slow down. Also I am someone of a time lord. Knowledge of time, perception of time, is the key that hold control over time. I can slow time down around me while thinking inside myself. I can think on time and bend it to my will. Its not something difficult to learn and is a worthwhile pursuit. Things we say about time like "time flies when we are having fun" all create the experience we have of time. Just keep in mind that the experience of time, much like anything else, can become fluid and change. Time is a great teacher and ally is you befriend it. It is wise to make every moment count. That realization when rolled around and pondered on just may give you the intent you need to really "stop and smell the roses".

Yes I do enjoy our conversations. And I agree we have each adapted to suit one another. You no longer get under my skin 'so to speak'.

I am lucky in that I have undergone extreme hardship in my life. Pure agony and pain for long terms. I learned to wield pain and befriend it. Wield fear and befriend it. Over time I learned not just to enjoy the great miracles in my life but take great pleasure in the small things as well. I now enjoy peace of mind, however brief that can be, and make the most out of the average ways of life. I know now that extreme hardship merely expands our love of the small things, and enhances the experience of joy and life.

[Guest]

serloco wrote:I know now that extreme hardship merely expands our love of the small things, and enhances the experience of joy and life.
Yeah.  It sort of sucks how that works.  Obviously everyone suffers--it's just to what degree do people differ.  If I hadn't of suffered, I wouldn't know the joys I need in my life.  In fact, I wouldn't even need joy.  I only know joy because I've known sadness.  I only know loyalty because I've met betrayal.  I only know love because I met hate.  Without something to compare, I would remain ignorant.  Would I rather be ignorant and not know pain--or would I rather know pain and pursue joy.  Such crappy choices  

Breaking routines is a great suggestion to slow time.  I've known that as breaking patterns, but I can't always identify MY patterns.  I can see patterns in others just fine though  To be fair, I prefer to run from personal closeness with others.  That frightens me.  I've had many bad experiences associated with personal closeness.  A few at this site, in fact.  Elias123 was declared (can't recall if he was self-declared or NLW declared) a Nagual when I first met him.  I PMed, that night we had a shared dream (this is when I didn't know sharing dreams was a thing yet).  After this he brought me into his inner circle.  A few months later he declared me evil and ejected me from the group.  I'm trying to remember what I did.  I think I wasn't behaving appropriately, that sounds pretty accurate.  I didn't care enough about him is what it boiled down to.  I'm sure there are some logs of that somewhere around the site.  I was removed from RF.  Some time later I was to come back into RF (forget why).  Elias told Wolf I wasn't allowed back.  Wolf ignored Elias and let me back Anyway.  My pattern seems to involve befriending people who later decide they don't want me because I'm not giving them what they expect me to give them.  I've never intentionally tried to piss those people off either.  After the first few times I realized being close to people hurts me when they decide I'm not.... appropriate.  Perhaps that's why I'm so quick, if I remain in one place for too long then I get hurt.  If I move fast enough, people can't keep up.  They can't hurt me because I'm no longer around to be hurt lol.  

You bring up a fair point--to make every moment count.  I do stop to smell the roses, I just need three seconds instead of three hours.

Also, you mention shields, blocks, and curses to ward out evil intrusions.  I realize religion often pushes the concept of evil, but I personally wonder if evil is real.  Instead of blocking "evil" thoughts, you could opt to understand what is driving you to act, then find another way to meet that same need; one which doesn't hurt others.  If you deny the experience, those denials often slip through the cracks and somewhat haunt the mind.  If you address them then you can eliminate them.  Mastery, then elimination over your thoughts instead of only eliminating your thoughts.  If you don't understand why you're having those thoughts then the pattern will continue to repeat in new ways.  I'm currently trying to spot my own patterns.  Running seems to be my most obvious pattern.  Yet I run to avoid upsetting people.  I upset people by being myself, by accidentally walking into their sensitive spots.  Then all hell breaks loose.  I don't know how to fix that pattern of mine.  I've been avoiding closeness to stop that pattern.  When I do allow closeness, I run into the same issue of stumbling into sensitive spots and then I'm chased with pitchforks this tells me I need to find closeness with people who accept my "evil" xD Rather, I need to be around a different type of people.  I don't know how to find those people either.  I mean, I found you.  You seem very open to my limitations of being.  Glance and Sen have also been pretty open about my inadequacies.  Others too have tolerated me well enough.  Needless to say, it's been a tough pattern to break.  For now, I suppose avoiding personal closeness is the best method to stop the pattern--but being alone all the time sort of sucks lol.

[Guest]

It's interesting what you mention about giving knowledge to dogs and swines. My dad has a decent knowledge base and since I was 10 years old he would continuously tell me, "Never give anyone 100% of your knowledge. You give half, then you see what they do with it. If they turn on you, then you stop teaching them." I never thought I would need that advice until I reached my 20s Then in my 30s I figured I grew more by giving 100% because if I got snickerdoodled then I would be forced to either die or grow. The risk was higher, so it was more exciting for me to give 100% Likely not the ideal method of growing. These days I give around 50% as a max. Not because I like to withhold information, but because people don't want more than that.

In terms of being respected, it's nice to want and hope for that, but it's another thing to receive it. We can't control what others do, we're restricted to mastering ourselves. Which means, if people are inappropriate for us then we should shift away from them. If those same people later become appropriate then we can shift back In a way, I think that's what you and I have done. We feuded and stalked one another. Yet, here we are today. In all fairness, I recognized we were very similar in approach--we just differed in interpretation and application, but those deviances were minor. Once we each shifted toward one another, we're able to have enjoyable conversations (well, I consider these enjoyable I don't know how you feel).

I don't think you're challenging me any longer. I mean, you do challenge me in ways I enjoy--but not in ways I find annoying. You've changed your approach to meet me halfway and you see my individuality and adjust yourself to accommodate me. I appreciate that gesture, so I do the same in return. I agree, if we're going to be infinite beings, why not enjoy ourselves. It's just a matter of discovering what it is which brings us the most joy.

What are you working on right now which you're open to discussing?

Right now I'm working on slowing down I'm also working on trying to manage my tonal (my spirit could use the rest). If you have any advice on how to move slower, I could use it! Actually, I'm studying for my yoga instructor license--so ideally that has all the knowledge I require to slow down. On the other hand, I've been whizzing through that stuff. I'm uncertain if it's possible to slow down. There's so much momentum within my spirit that I'm convinced I'm incapable of slowing down xD Seriously, I stop to smell the roses and I still inhale, see the beauty, immerse myself in the moments and feel them. Then I'm done within a few seconds. Perhaps you have something to share to help me understand what it is I'm supposed to be doing when I slow down?

[serloco]

Well I am a firm believer that one can accomplish anything. Even controlling people. I used to be a master at it. I think i mentioned how it all backfired on me and once I let that knowledge out I began also getting controlled. Not something I practice anymore for obvious reasons. You get what you give in life. However that brings me to what I am working on. I am working on banishing mind control techniques and domination practices. I think that the knowledge you have about not being able to control someone is much better then the knowledge I have about being able. It creates no way in. I spend every day fighting to regain control over my mind. It is a winning battle however and I am creating shields now and blockers, and curses on my mind to ward out evil intrusions. It is coming along good and I foresee heavenly skies in my future.

Slowing down is a good idea. For myself it comes along well with the realization that there is always more then meets the eye. Stopping to silence ourselves, our internal chattering, and taking a good look at everything around us can do this for me. When I break my routines and intend to expand awareness it helps for me to slow down. Also I am someone of a time lord. Knowledge of time, perception of time, is the key that hold control over time. I can slow time down around me while thinking inside myself. I can think on time and bend it to my will. Its not something difficult to learn and is a worthwhile pursuit. Things we say about time like "time flies when we are having fun" all create the experience we have of time. Just keep in mind that the experience of time, much like anything else, can become fluid and change. Time is a great teacher and ally is you befriend it. It is wise to make every moment count. That realization when rolled around and pondered on just may give you the intent you need to really "stop and smell the roses".

Yes I do enjoy our conversations. And I agree we have each adapted to suit one another. You no longer get under my skin 'so to speak'.

I am lucky in that I have undergone extreme hardship in my life. Pure agony and pain for long terms. I learned to wield pain and befriend it. Wield fear and befriend it. Over time I learned not just to enjoy the great miracles in my life but take great pleasure in the small things as well. I now enjoy peace of mind, however brief that can be, and make the most out of the average ways of life. I know now that extreme hardship merely expands our love of the small things, and enhances the experience of joy and life.

[Guest]

serloco wrote:I know now that extreme hardship merely expands our love of the small things, and enhances the experience of joy and life.
Yeah.  It sort of sucks how that works.  Obviously everyone suffers--it's just to what degree do people differ.  If I hadn't of suffered, I wouldn't know the joys I need in my life.  In fact, I wouldn't even need joy.  I only know joy because I've known sadness.  I only know loyalty because I've met betrayal.  I only know love because I met hate.  Without something to compare, I would remain ignorant.  Would I rather be ignorant and not know pain--or would I rather know pain and pursue joy.  Such crappy choices  

Breaking routines is a great suggestion to slow time.  I've known that as breaking patterns, but I can't always identify MY patterns.  I can see patterns in others just fine though  To be fair, I prefer to run from personal closeness with others.  That frightens me.  I've had many bad experiences associated with personal closeness.  A few at this site, in fact.  Elias123 was declared (can't recall if he was self-declared or NLW declared) a Nagual when I first met him.  I PMed, that night we had a shared dream (this is when I didn't know sharing dreams was a thing yet).  After this he brought me into his inner circle.  A few months later he declared me evil and ejected me from the group.  I'm trying to remember what I did.  I think I wasn't behaving appropriately, that sounds pretty accurate.  I didn't care enough about him is what it boiled down to.  I'm sure there are some logs of that somewhere around the site.  I was removed from RF.  Some time later I was to come back into RF (forget why).  Elias told Wolf I wasn't allowed back.  Wolf ignored Elias and let me back Anyway.  My pattern seems to involve befriending people who later decide they don't want me because I'm not giving them what they expect me to give them.  I've never intentionally tried to piss those people off either.  After the first few times I realized being close to people hurts me when they decide I'm not.... appropriate.  Perhaps that's why I'm so quick, if I remain in one place for too long then I get hurt.  If I move fast enough, people can't keep up.  They can't hurt me because I'm no longer around to be hurt lol.  

You bring up a fair point--to make every moment count.  I do stop to smell the roses, I just need three seconds instead of three hours.

Also, you mention shields, blocks, and curses to ward out evil intrusions.  I realize religion often pushes the concept of evil, but I personally wonder if evil is real.  Instead of blocking "evil" thoughts, you could opt to understand what is driving you to act, then find another way to meet that same need; one which doesn't hurt others.  If you deny the experience, those denials often slip through the cracks and somewhat haunt the mind.  If you address them then you can eliminate them.  Mastery, then elimination over your thoughts instead of only eliminating your thoughts.  If you don't understand why you're having those thoughts then the pattern will continue to repeat in new ways.  I'm currently trying to spot my own patterns.  Running seems to be my most obvious pattern.  Yet I run to avoid upsetting people.  I upset people by being myself, by accidentally walking into their sensitive spots.  Then all hell breaks loose.  I don't know how to fix that pattern of mine.  I've been avoiding closeness to stop that pattern.  When I do allow closeness, I run into the same issue of stumbling into sensitive spots and then I'm chased with pitchforks this tells me I need to find closeness with people who accept my "evil" xD Rather, I need to be around a different type of people.  I don't know how to find those people either.  I mean, I found you.  You seem very open to my limitations of being.  Glance and Sen have also been pretty open about my inadequacies.  Others too have tolerated me well enough.  Needless to say, it's been a tough pattern to break.  For now, I suppose avoiding personal closeness is the best method to stop the pattern--but being alone all the time sort of sucks lol.

[Guest]

It's interesting what you mention about giving knowledge to dogs and swines. My dad has a decent knowledge base and since I was 10 years old he would continuously tell me, "Never give anyone 100% of your knowledge. You give half, then you see what they do with it. If they turn on you, then you stop teaching them." I never thought I would need that advice until I reached my 20s Then in my 30s I figured I grew more by giving 100% because if I got snickerdoodled then I would be forced to either die or grow. The risk was higher, so it was more exciting for me to give 100% Likely not the ideal method of growing. These days I give around 50% as a max. Not because I like to withhold information, but because people don't want more than that.

In terms of being respected, it's nice to want and hope for that, but it's another thing to receive it. We can't control what others do, we're restricted to mastering ourselves. Which means, if people are inappropriate for us then we should shift away from them. If those same people later become appropriate then we can shift back In a way, I think that's what you and I have done. We feuded and stalked one another. Yet, here we are today. In all fairness, I recognized we were very similar in approach--we just differed in interpretation and application, but those deviances were minor. Once we each shifted toward one another, we're able to have enjoyable conversations (well, I consider these enjoyable I don't know how you feel).

I don't think you're challenging me any longer. I mean, you do challenge me in ways I enjoy--but not in ways I find annoying. You've changed your approach to meet me halfway and you see my individuality and adjust yourself to accommodate me. I appreciate that gesture, so I do the same in return. I agree, if we're going to be infinite beings, why not enjoy ourselves. It's just a matter of discovering what it is which brings us the most joy.

What are you working on right now which you're open to discussing?

Right now I'm working on slowing down I'm also working on trying to manage my tonal (my spirit could use the rest). If you have any advice on how to move slower, I could use it! Actually, I'm studying for my yoga instructor license--so ideally that has all the knowledge I require to slow down. On the other hand, I've been whizzing through that stuff. I'm uncertain if it's possible to slow down. There's so much momentum within my spirit that I'm convinced I'm incapable of slowing down xD Seriously, I stop to smell the roses and I still inhale, see the beauty, immerse myself in the moments and feel them. Then I'm done within a few seconds. Perhaps you have something to share to help me understand what it is I'm supposed to be doing when I slow down?

[serloco]

Well I am a firm believer that one can accomplish anything. Even controlling people. I used to be a master at it. I think i mentioned how it all backfired on me and once I let that knowledge out I began also getting controlled. Not something I practice anymore for obvious reasons. You get what you give in life. However that brings me to what I am working on. I am working on banishing mind control techniques and domination practices. I think that the knowledge you have about not being able to control someone is much better then the knowledge I have about being able. It creates no way in. I spend every day fighting to regain control over my mind. It is a winning battle however and I am creating shields now and blockers, and curses on my mind to ward out evil intrusions. It is coming along good and I foresee heavenly skies in my future.

Slowing down is a good idea. For myself it comes along well with the realization that there is always more then meets the eye. Stopping to silence ourselves, our internal chattering, and taking a good look at everything around us can do this for me. When I break my routines and intend to expand awareness it helps for me to slow down. Also I am someone of a time lord. Knowledge of time, perception of time, is the key that hold control over time. I can slow time down around me while thinking inside myself. I can think on time and bend it to my will. Its not something difficult to learn and is a worthwhile pursuit. Things we say about time like "time flies when we are having fun" all create the experience we have of time. Just keep in mind that the experience of time, much like anything else, can become fluid and change. Time is a great teacher and ally is you befriend it. It is wise to make every moment count. That realization when rolled around and pondered on just may give you the intent you need to really "stop and smell the roses".

Yes I do enjoy our conversations. And I agree we have each adapted to suit one another. You no longer get under my skin 'so to speak'.

I am lucky in that I have undergone extreme hardship in my life. Pure agony and pain for long terms. I learned to wield pain and befriend it. Wield fear and befriend it. Over time I learned not just to enjoy the great miracles in my life but take great pleasure in the small things as well. I now enjoy peace of mind, however brief that can be, and make the most out of the average ways of life. I know now that extreme hardship merely expands our love of the small things, and enhances the experience of joy and life.

[Guest]

serloco wrote:I know now that extreme hardship merely expands our love of the small things, and enhances the experience of joy and life.
Yeah.  It sort of sucks how that works.  Obviously everyone suffers--it's just to what degree do people differ.  If I hadn't of suffered, I wouldn't know the joys I need in my life.  In fact, I wouldn't even need joy.  I only know joy because I've known sadness.  I only know loyalty because I've met betrayal.  I only know love because I met hate.  Without something to compare, I would remain ignorant.  Would I rather be ignorant and not know pain--or would I rather know pain and pursue joy.  Such crappy choices  

Breaking routines is a great suggestion to slow time.  I've known that as breaking patterns, but I can't always identify MY patterns.  I can see patterns in others just fine though  To be fair, I prefer to run from personal closeness with others.  That frightens me.  I've had many bad experiences associated with personal closeness.  A few at this site, in fact.  Elias123 was declared (can't recall if he was self-declared or NLW declared) a Nagual when I first met him.  I PMed, that night we had a shared dream (this is when I didn't know sharing dreams was a thing yet).  After this he brought me into his inner circle.  A few months later he declared me evil and ejected me from the group.  I'm trying to remember what I did.  I think I wasn't behaving appropriately, that sounds pretty accurate.  I didn't care enough about him is what it boiled down to.  I'm sure there are some logs of that somewhere around the site.  I was removed from RF.  Some time later I was to come back into RF (forget why).  Elias told Wolf I wasn't allowed back.  Wolf ignored Elias and let me back Anyway.  My pattern seems to involve befriending people who later decide they don't want me because I'm not giving them what they expect me to give them.  I've never intentionally tried to piss those people off either.  After the first few times I realized being close to people hurts me when they decide I'm not.... appropriate.  Perhaps that's why I'm so quick, if I remain in one place for too long then I get hurt.  If I move fast enough, people can't keep up.  They can't hurt me because I'm no longer around to be hurt lol.  

You bring up a fair point--to make every moment count.  I do stop to smell the roses, I just need three seconds instead of three hours.

Also, you mention shields, blocks, and curses to ward out evil intrusions.  I realize religion often pushes the concept of evil, but I personally wonder if evil is real.  Instead of blocking "evil" thoughts, you could opt to understand what is driving you to act, then find another way to meet that same need; one which doesn't hurt others.  If you deny the experience, those denials often slip through the cracks and somewhat haunt the mind.  If you address them then you can eliminate them.  Mastery, then elimination over your thoughts instead of only eliminating your thoughts.  If you don't understand why you're having those thoughts then the pattern will continue to repeat in new ways.  I'm currently trying to spot my own patterns.  Running seems to be my most obvious pattern.  Yet I run to avoid upsetting people.  I upset people by being myself, by accidentally walking into their sensitive spots.  Then all hell breaks loose.  I don't know how to fix that pattern of mine.  I've been avoiding closeness to stop that pattern.  When I do allow closeness, I run into the same issue of stumbling into sensitive spots and then I'm chased with pitchforks this tells me I need to find closeness with people who accept my "evil" xD Rather, I need to be around a different type of people.  I don't know how to find those people either.  I mean, I found you.  You seem very open to my limitations of being.  Glance and Sen have also been pretty open about my inadequacies.  Others too have tolerated me well enough.  Needless to say, it's been a tough pattern to break.  For now, I suppose avoiding personal closeness is the best method to stop the pattern--but being alone all the time sort of sucks lol.

[Guest]

It's interesting what you mention about giving knowledge to dogs and swines. My dad has a decent knowledge base and since I was 10 years old he would continuously tell me, "Never give anyone 100% of your knowledge. You give half, then you see what they do with it. If they turn on you, then you stop teaching them." I never thought I would need that advice until I reached my 20s Then in my 30s I figured I grew more by giving 100% because if I got snickerdoodled then I would be forced to either die or grow. The risk was higher, so it was more exciting for me to give 100% Likely not the ideal method of growing. These days I give around 50% as a max. Not because I like to withhold information, but because people don't want more than that.

In terms of being respected, it's nice to want and hope for that, but it's another thing to receive it. We can't control what others do, we're restricted to mastering ourselves. Which means, if people are inappropriate for us then we should shift away from them. If those same people later become appropriate then we can shift back In a way, I think that's what you and I have done. We feuded and stalked one another. Yet, here we are today. In all fairness, I recognized we were very similar in approach--we just differed in interpretation and application, but those deviances were minor. Once we each shifted toward one another, we're able to have enjoyable conversations (well, I consider these enjoyable I don't know how you feel).

I don't think you're challenging me any longer. I mean, you do challenge me in ways I enjoy--but not in ways I find annoying. You've changed your approach to meet me halfway and you see my individuality and adjust yourself to accommodate me. I appreciate that gesture, so I do the same in return. I agree, if we're going to be infinite beings, why not enjoy ourselves. It's just a matter of discovering what it is which brings us the most joy.

What are you working on right now which you're open to discussing?

Right now I'm working on slowing down I'm also working on trying to manage my tonal (my spirit could use the rest). If you have any advice on how to move slower, I could use it! Actually, I'm studying for my yoga instructor license--so ideally that has all the knowledge I require to slow down. On the other hand, I've been whizzing through that stuff. I'm uncertain if it's possible to slow down. There's so much momentum within my spirit that I'm convinced I'm incapable of slowing down xD Seriously, I stop to smell the roses and I still inhale, see the beauty, immerse myself in the moments and feel them. Then I'm done within a few seconds. Perhaps you have something to share to help me understand what it is I'm supposed to be doing when I slow down?

[serloco]

Well I am a firm believer that one can accomplish anything. Even controlling people. I used to be a master at it. I think i mentioned how it all backfired on me and once I let that knowledge out I began also getting controlled. Not something I practice anymore for obvious reasons. You get what you give in life. However that brings me to what I am working on. I am working on banishing mind control techniques and domination practices. I think that the knowledge you have about not being able to control someone is much better then the knowledge I have about being able. It creates no way in. I spend every day fighting to regain control over my mind. It is a winning battle however and I am creating shields now and blockers, and curses on my mind to ward out evil intrusions. It is coming along good and I foresee heavenly skies in my future.

Slowing down is a good idea. For myself it comes along well with the realization that there is always more then meets the eye. Stopping to silence ourselves, our internal chattering, and taking a good look at everything around us can do this for me. When I break my routines and intend to expand awareness it helps for me to slow down. Also I am someone of a time lord. Knowledge of time, perception of time, is the key that hold control over time. I can slow time down around me while thinking inside myself. I can think on time and bend it to my will. Its not something difficult to learn and is a worthwhile pursuit. Things we say about time like "time flies when we are having fun" all create the experience we have of time. Just keep in mind that the experience of time, much like anything else, can become fluid and change. Time is a great teacher and ally is you befriend it. It is wise to make every moment count. That realization when rolled around and pondered on just may give you the intent you need to really "stop and smell the roses".

Yes I do enjoy our conversations. And I agree we have each adapted to suit one another. You no longer get under my skin 'so to speak'.

I am lucky in that I have undergone extreme hardship in my life. Pure agony and pain for long terms. I learned to wield pain and befriend it. Wield fear and befriend it. Over time I learned not just to enjoy the great miracles in my life but take great pleasure in the small things as well. I now enjoy peace of mind, however brief that can be, and make the most out of the average ways of life. I know now that extreme hardship merely expands our love of the small things, and enhances the experience of joy and life.

[Guest]

serloco wrote:I know now that extreme hardship merely expands our love of the small things, and enhances the experience of joy and life.
Yeah.  It sort of sucks how that works.  Obviously everyone suffers--it's just to what degree do people differ.  If I hadn't of suffered, I wouldn't know the joys I need in my life.  In fact, I wouldn't even need joy.  I only know joy because I've known sadness.  I only know loyalty because I've met betrayal.  I only know love because I met hate.  Without something to compare, I would remain ignorant.  Would I rather be ignorant and not know pain--or would I rather know pain and pursue joy.  Such crappy choices  

Breaking routines is a great suggestion to slow time.  I've known that as breaking patterns, but I can't always identify MY patterns.  I can see patterns in others just fine though  To be fair, I prefer to run from personal closeness with others.  That frightens me.  I've had many bad experiences associated with personal closeness.  A few at this site, in fact.  Elias123 was declared (can't recall if he was self-declared or NLW declared) a Nagual when I first met him.  I PMed, that night we had a shared dream (this is when I didn't know sharing dreams was a thing yet).  After this he brought me into his inner circle.  A few months later he declared me evil and ejected me from the group.  I'm trying to remember what I did.  I think I wasn't behaving appropriately, that sounds pretty accurate.  I didn't care enough about him is what it boiled down to.  I'm sure there are some logs of that somewhere around the site.  I was removed from RF.  Some time later I was to come back into RF (forget why).  Elias told Wolf I wasn't allowed back.  Wolf ignored Elias and let me back Anyway.  My pattern seems to involve befriending people who later decide they don't want me because I'm not giving them what they expect me to give them.  I've never intentionally tried to piss those people off either.  After the first few times I realized being close to people hurts me when they decide I'm not.... appropriate.  Perhaps that's why I'm so quick, if I remain in one place for too long then I get hurt.  If I move fast enough, people can't keep up.  They can't hurt me because I'm no longer around to be hurt lol.  

You bring up a fair point--to make every moment count.  I do stop to smell the roses, I just need three seconds instead of three hours.

Also, you mention shields, blocks, and curses to ward out evil intrusions.  I realize religion often pushes the concept of evil, but I personally wonder if evil is real.  Instead of blocking "evil" thoughts, you could opt to understand what is driving you to act, then find another way to meet that same need; one which doesn't hurt others.  If you deny the experience, those denials often slip through the cracks and somewhat haunt the mind.  If you address them then you can eliminate them.  Mastery, then elimination over your thoughts instead of only eliminating your thoughts.  If you don't understand why you're having those thoughts then the pattern will continue to repeat in new ways.  I'm currently trying to spot my own patterns.  Running seems to be my most obvious pattern.  Yet I run to avoid upsetting people.  I upset people by being myself, by accidentally walking into their sensitive spots.  Then all hell breaks loose.  I don't know how to fix that pattern of mine.  I've been avoiding closeness to stop that pattern.  When I do allow closeness, I run into the same issue of stumbling into sensitive spots and then I'm chased with pitchforks this tells me I need to find closeness with people who accept my "evil" xD Rather, I need to be around a different type of people.  I don't know how to find those people either.  I mean, I found you.  You seem very open to my limitations of being.  Glance and Sen have also been pretty open about my inadequacies.  Others too have tolerated me well enough.  Needless to say, it's been a tough pattern to break.  For now, I suppose avoiding personal closeness is the best method to stop the pattern--but being alone all the time sort of sucks lol.

[Guest]

It's interesting what you mention about giving knowledge to dogs and swines. My dad has a decent knowledge base and since I was 10 years old he would continuously tell me, "Never give anyone 100% of your knowledge. You give half, then you see what they do with it. If they turn on you, then you stop teaching them." I never thought I would need that advice until I reached my 20s Then in my 30s I figured I grew more by giving 100% because if I got snickerdoodled then I would be forced to either die or grow. The risk was higher, so it was more exciting for me to give 100% Likely not the ideal method of growing. These days I give around 50% as a max. Not because I like to withhold information, but because people don't want more than that.

In terms of being respected, it's nice to want and hope for that, but it's another thing to receive it. We can't control what others do, we're restricted to mastering ourselves. Which means, if people are inappropriate for us then we should shift away from them. If those same people later become appropriate then we can shift back In a way, I think that's what you and I have done. We feuded and stalked one another. Yet, here we are today. In all fairness, I recognized we were very similar in approach--we just differed in interpretation and application, but those deviances were minor. Once we each shifted toward one another, we're able to have enjoyable conversations (well, I consider these enjoyable I don't know how you feel).

I don't think you're challenging me any longer. I mean, you do challenge me in ways I enjoy--but not in ways I find annoying. You've changed your approach to meet me halfway and you see my individuality and adjust yourself to accommodate me. I appreciate that gesture, so I do the same in return. I agree, if we're going to be infinite beings, why not enjoy ourselves. It's just a matter of discovering what it is which brings us the most joy.

What are you working on right now which you're open to discussing?

Right now I'm working on slowing down I'm also working on trying to manage my tonal (my spirit could use the rest). If you have any advice on how to move slower, I could use it! Actually, I'm studying for my yoga instructor license--so ideally that has all the knowledge I require to slow down. On the other hand, I've been whizzing through that stuff. I'm uncertain if it's possible to slow down. There's so much momentum within my spirit that I'm convinced I'm incapable of slowing down xD Seriously, I stop to smell the roses and I still inhale, see the beauty, immerse myself in the moments and feel them. Then I'm done within a few seconds. Perhaps you have something to share to help me understand what it is I'm supposed to be doing when I slow down?

[serloco]

Well I am a firm believer that one can accomplish anything. Even controlling people. I used to be a master at it. I think i mentioned how it all backfired on me and once I let that knowledge out I began also getting controlled. Not something I practice anymore for obvious reasons. You get what you give in life. However that brings me to what I am working on. I am working on banishing mind control techniques and domination practices. I think that the knowledge you have about not being able to control someone is much better then the knowledge I have about being able. It creates no way in. I spend every day fighting to regain control over my mind. It is a winning battle however and I am creating shields now and blockers, and curses on my mind to ward out evil intrusions. It is coming along good and I foresee heavenly skies in my future.

Slowing down is a good idea. For myself it comes along well with the realization that there is always more then meets the eye. Stopping to silence ourselves, our internal chattering, and taking a good look at everything around us can do this for me. When I break my routines and intend to expand awareness it helps for me to slow down. Also I am someone of a time lord. Knowledge of time, perception of time, is the key that hold control over time. I can slow time down around me while thinking inside myself. I can think on time and bend it to my will. Its not something difficult to learn and is a worthwhile pursuit. Things we say about time like "time flies when we are having fun" all create the experience we have of time. Just keep in mind that the experience of time, much like anything else, can become fluid and change. Time is a great teacher and ally is you befriend it. It is wise to make every moment count. That realization when rolled around and pondered on just may give you the intent you need to really "stop and smell the roses".

Yes I do enjoy our conversations. And I agree we have each adapted to suit one another. You no longer get under my skin 'so to speak'.

I am lucky in that I have undergone extreme hardship in my life. Pure agony and pain for long terms. I learned to wield pain and befriend it. Wield fear and befriend it. Over time I learned not just to enjoy the great miracles in my life but take great pleasure in the small things as well. I now enjoy peace of mind, however brief that can be, and make the most out of the average ways of life. I know now that extreme hardship merely expands our love of the small things, and enhances the experience of joy and life.

[Guest]

serloco wrote:I know now that extreme hardship merely expands our love of the small things, and enhances the experience of joy and life.
Yeah.  It sort of sucks how that works.  Obviously everyone suffers--it's just to what degree do people differ.  If I hadn't of suffered, I wouldn't know the joys I need in my life.  In fact, I wouldn't even need joy.  I only know joy because I've known sadness.  I only know loyalty because I've met betrayal.  I only know love because I met hate.  Without something to compare, I would remain ignorant.  Would I rather be ignorant and not know pain--or would I rather know pain and pursue joy.  Such crappy choices  

Breaking routines is a great suggestion to slow time.  I've known that as breaking patterns, but I can't always identify MY patterns.  I can see patterns in others just fine though  To be fair, I prefer to run from personal closeness with others.  That frightens me.  I've had many bad experiences associated with personal closeness.  A few at this site, in fact.  Elias123 was declared (can't recall if he was self-declared or NLW declared) a Nagual when I first met him.  I PMed, that night we had a shared dream (this is when I didn't know sharing dreams was a thing yet).  After this he brought me into his inner circle.  A few months later he declared me evil and ejected me from the group.  I'm trying to remember what I did.  I think I wasn't behaving appropriately, that sounds pretty accurate.  I didn't care enough about him is what it boiled down to.  I'm sure there are some logs of that somewhere around the site.  I was removed from RF.  Some time later I was to come back into RF (forget why).  Elias told Wolf I wasn't allowed back.  Wolf ignored Elias and let me back Anyway.  My pattern seems to involve befriending people who later decide they don't want me because I'm not giving them what they expect me to give them.  I've never intentionally tried to piss those people off either.  After the first few times I realized being close to people hurts me when they decide I'm not.... appropriate.  Perhaps that's why I'm so quick, if I remain in one place for too long then I get hurt.  If I move fast enough, people can't keep up.  They can't hurt me because I'm no longer around to be hurt lol.  

You bring up a fair point--to make every moment count.  I do stop to smell the roses, I just need three seconds instead of three hours.

Also, you mention shields, blocks, and curses to ward out evil intrusions.  I realize religion often pushes the concept of evil, but I personally wonder if evil is real.  Instead of blocking "evil" thoughts, you could opt to understand what is driving you to act, then find another way to meet that same need; one which doesn't hurt others.  If you deny the experience, those denials often slip through the cracks and somewhat haunt the mind.  If you address them then you can eliminate them.  Mastery, then elimination over your thoughts instead of only eliminating your thoughts.  If you don't understand why you're having those thoughts then the pattern will continue to repeat in new ways.  I'm currently trying to spot my own patterns.  Running seems to be my most obvious pattern.  Yet I run to avoid upsetting people.  I upset people by being myself, by accidentally walking into their sensitive spots.  Then all hell breaks loose.  I don't know how to fix that pattern of mine.  I've been avoiding closeness to stop that pattern.  When I do allow closeness, I run into the same issue of stumbling into sensitive spots and then I'm chased with pitchforks this tells me I need to find closeness with people who accept my "evil" xD Rather, I need to be around a different type of people.  I don't know how to find those people either.  I mean, I found you.  You seem very open to my limitations of being.  Glance and Sen have also been pretty open about my inadequacies.  Others too have tolerated me well enough.  Needless to say, it's been a tough pattern to break.  For now, I suppose avoiding personal closeness is the best method to stop the pattern--but being alone all the time sort of sucks lol.

[Guest]

It's interesting what you mention about giving knowledge to dogs and swines. My dad has a decent knowledge base and since I was 10 years old he would continuously tell me, "Never give anyone 100% of your knowledge. You give half, then you see what they do with it. If they turn on you, then you stop teaching them." I never thought I would need that advice until I reached my 20s Then in my 30s I figured I grew more by giving 100% because if I got snickerdoodled then I would be forced to either die or grow. The risk was higher, so it was more exciting for me to give 100% Likely not the ideal method of growing. These days I give around 50% as a max. Not because I like to withhold information, but because people don't want more than that.

In terms of being respected, it's nice to want and hope for that, but it's another thing to receive it. We can't control what others do, we're restricted to mastering ourselves. Which means, if people are inappropriate for us then we should shift away from them. If those same people later become appropriate then we can shift back In a way, I think that's what you and I have done. We feuded and stalked one another. Yet, here we are today. In all fairness, I recognized we were very similar in approach--we just differed in interpretation and application, but those deviances were minor. Once we each shifted toward one another, we're able to have enjoyable conversations (well, I consider these enjoyable I don't know how you feel).

I don't think you're challenging me any longer. I mean, you do challenge me in ways I enjoy--but not in ways I find annoying. You've changed your approach to meet me halfway and you see my individuality and adjust yourself to accommodate me. I appreciate that gesture, so I do the same in return. I agree, if we're going to be infinite beings, why not enjoy ourselves. It's just a matter of discovering what it is which brings us the most joy.

What are you working on right now which you're open to discussing?

Right now I'm working on slowing down I'm also working on trying to manage my tonal (my spirit could use the rest). If you have any advice on how to move slower, I could use it! Actually, I'm studying for my yoga instructor license--so ideally that has all the knowledge I require to slow down. On the other hand, I've been whizzing through that stuff. I'm uncertain if it's possible to slow down. There's so much momentum within my spirit that I'm convinced I'm incapable of slowing down xD Seriously, I stop to smell the roses and I still inhale, see the beauty, immerse myself in the moments and feel them. Then I'm done within a few seconds. Perhaps you have something to share to help me understand what it is I'm supposed to be doing when I slow down?

[serloco]

Well I am a firm believer that one can accomplish anything. Even controlling people. I used to be a master at it. I think i mentioned how it all backfired on me and once I let that knowledge out I began also getting controlled. Not something I practice anymore for obvious reasons. You get what you give in life. However that brings me to what I am working on. I am working on banishing mind control techniques and domination practices. I think that the knowledge you have about not being able to control someone is much better then the knowledge I have about being able. It creates no way in. I spend every day fighting to regain control over my mind. It is a winning battle however and I am creating shields now and blockers, and curses on my mind to ward out evil intrusions. It is coming along good and I foresee heavenly skies in my future.

Slowing down is a good idea. For myself it comes along well with the realization that there is always more then meets the eye. Stopping to silence ourselves, our internal chattering, and taking a good look at everything around us can do this for me. When I break my routines and intend to expand awareness it helps for me to slow down. Also I am someone of a time lord. Knowledge of time, perception of time, is the key that hold control over time. I can slow time down around me while thinking inside myself. I can think on time and bend it to my will. Its not something difficult to learn and is a worthwhile pursuit. Things we say about time like "time flies when we are having fun" all create the experience we have of time. Just keep in mind that the experience of time, much like anything else, can become fluid and change. Time is a great teacher and ally is you befriend it. It is wise to make every moment count. That realization when rolled around and pondered on just may give you the intent you need to really "stop and smell the roses".

Yes I do enjoy our conversations. And I agree we have each adapted to suit one another. You no longer get under my skin 'so to speak'.

I am lucky in that I have undergone extreme hardship in my life. Pure agony and pain for long terms. I learned to wield pain and befriend it. Wield fear and befriend it. Over time I learned not just to enjoy the great miracles in my life but take great pleasure in the small things as well. I now enjoy peace of mind, however brief that can be, and make the most out of the average ways of life. I know now that extreme hardship merely expands our love of the small things, and enhances the experience of joy and life.

[Guest]

serloco wrote:I know now that extreme hardship merely expands our love of the small things, and enhances the experience of joy and life.
Yeah.  It sort of sucks how that works.  Obviously everyone suffers--it's just to what degree do people differ.  If I hadn't of suffered, I wouldn't know the joys I need in my life.  In fact, I wouldn't even need joy.  I only know joy because I've known sadness.  I only know loyalty because I've met betrayal.  I only know love because I met hate.  Without something to compare, I would remain ignorant.  Would I rather be ignorant and not know pain--or would I rather know pain and pursue joy.  Such crappy choices  

Breaking routines is a great suggestion to slow time.  I've known that as breaking patterns, but I can't always identify MY patterns.  I can see patterns in others just fine though  To be fair, I prefer to run from personal closeness with others.  That frightens me.  I've had many bad experiences associated with personal closeness.  A few at this site, in fact.  Elias123 was declared (can't recall if he was self-declared or NLW declared) a Nagual when I first met him.  I PMed, that night we had a shared dream (this is when I didn't know sharing dreams was a thing yet).  After this he brought me into his inner circle.  A few months later he declared me evil and ejected me from the group.  I'm trying to remember what I did.  I think I wasn't behaving appropriately, that sounds pretty accurate.  I didn't care enough about him is what it boiled down to.  I'm sure there are some logs of that somewhere around the site.  I was removed from RF.  Some time later I was to come back into RF (forget why).  Elias told Wolf I wasn't allowed back.  Wolf ignored Elias and let me back Anyway.  My pattern seems to involve befriending people who later decide they don't want me because I'm not giving them what they expect me to give them.  I've never intentionally tried to piss those people off either.  After the first few times I realized being close to people hurts me when they decide I'm not.... appropriate.  Perhaps that's why I'm so quick, if I remain in one place for too long then I get hurt.  If I move fast enough, people can't keep up.  They can't hurt me because I'm no longer around to be hurt lol.  

You bring up a fair point--to make every moment count.  I do stop to smell the roses, I just need three seconds instead of three hours.

Also, you mention shields, blocks, and curses to ward out evil intrusions.  I realize religion often pushes the concept of evil, but I personally wonder if evil is real.  Instead of blocking "evil" thoughts, you could opt to understand what is driving you to act, then find another way to meet that same need; one which doesn't hurt others.  If you deny the experience, those denials often slip through the cracks and somewhat haunt the mind.  If you address them then you can eliminate them.  Mastery, then elimination over your thoughts instead of only eliminating your thoughts.  If you don't understand why you're having those thoughts then the pattern will continue to repeat in new ways.  I'm currently trying to spot my own patterns.  Running seems to be my most obvious pattern.  Yet I run to avoid upsetting people.  I upset people by being myself, by accidentally walking into their sensitive spots.  Then all hell breaks loose.  I don't know how to fix that pattern of mine.  I've been avoiding closeness to stop that pattern.  When I do allow closeness, I run into the same issue of stumbling into sensitive spots and then I'm chased with pitchforks this tells me I need to find closeness with people who accept my "evil" xD Rather, I need to be around a different type of people.  I don't know how to find those people either.  I mean, I found you.  You seem very open to my limitations of being.  Glance and Sen have also been pretty open about my inadequacies.  Others too have tolerated me well enough.  Needless to say, it's been a tough pattern to break.  For now, I suppose avoiding personal closeness is the best method to stop the pattern--but being alone all the time sort of sucks lol.