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Serloco,
Before I write anything too amazing or insightful... I wanted to discuss something with you. Power comes from the ability to delete the self. There's an emptiness. Those with power have been repeatedly reminded they are alone in the world. They are so alone they soon realize no matter their actions they will never feel closeness. They wind up giving up entirely. Hope, when they discover it, brings them back to life. The potential for closeness is dangerous. For a powerful person, to believe they can possess love changes their world. Should that be stripped away they are then reduced to emptiness once again. Without hope. It's great for power, but it's hopeless for finding a reason to engage others. People enjoy elitism when it's impersonal. Anything else and it makes powerful people targets. Many pursue power mistakenly thinking it will save them (taking them past the eagle). What they don't realize is only the most lost enter power. A grand goal until a person learns of the requirement to hold power: a squeaky clean vessel, one void of love, hope, and dreams. If there is no self then love, hope, and dreams have no home to reside. Power is only held by those who achieve such a fate. Sometimes they manage to move closer to humane exchanges, but sooner or later they realize why it's dangerous to embrace hope. They ultimately retreat back into the folds where the only people who could possibly find them would have no desire to find them. It's a pitiful existence.
With this cheery thought in mind, I'm sharing this because you should know you're not missing out on anything. You should never choose to enter power. Only if circumstances force you into power should you accept it. No one tells you how to apply power either. You just pick how and make up your own rules. Given the lack of self, there's no real point to using power so the neat things most envision achieving with power become irrelevant.
My point is you should be made aware of the risks and to be told it's not what many have been lead to believe. Those who do make connections do it in hopes of helping others find the freedom they themselves lack. It's actually a cruel joke. Please don't feel like you require power to live a fulfilling life. Life is only fulfilling when you live outside of power, not inside it. On the other hand, if you're forced into power I think it's nice to have another to share in that experience. Having to discover it alone only adds acid to the wound. It doesn't really make a difference, it just makes it so much more difficult to find your way out.
You strike me as the type who will be forced into power, but I hope youll be bumped out once you arrive. You wouldn't enjoy it, but you'll know its taste and will have a greater command of it even after you exit (if you decide to exit).
I have a lot respect for what you've already endured. I have even greater respect for you now. You've chosen happiness and found it. I've been wishing on shooting stars and birthday candles since my teens for what you found. I would trade every ability I have for the opportunity you have now. If I can offer you any advice, appreciate every single moment with her. Most don't realize what they have until it's gone. Realize what you have while you have it.
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Yes I understand that without a self you have no true volition. That is why Silvio Manuel had don Juan to guide his volition. Being the full will of the world removes such volition. He found himself not wanting to do anything at all even tho he could do anything. He had no desires and no wants. I have been very close to this position however I always leave myself a small amount of volition.
I am happy because I have great things to look forward to in my life. Things I want to do and things i want to accomplish. I wouldnt want to lose that. I was King of my world for many years. I can control people and make them move to my will. I have a great deal of personal power. HOwever as you say I lost the desire for power. I dont want to control someone anymore. I dont want to create new worlds. I have lost all my desire for the things that used to drive me. I want a long and healthy life. I am sick of seeing people "move" under my command. It makes me sick. Its ugly and its wrong. I dont enjoy working with volitionless allies anymore although in the beginning it brought me total control and power. I loved every minute and taking over the world was a daily routine. Seeking power over everything was what used to drive me. Nowadays I want to meet someone and love them for who THEY are. Not because of my will to make them what I want. It sounds like a dream to me. I have been telling people for so long what to do , what to think, how to be. Nowadays I am repulsed by all my old powers.
Truth is I dont feel love for any woman. I do not crave it anymore. It is a novel idea I know, and I think I should but truthfully I lose interest so fast. The fact is I am a seer. I see most often. And when I am seeing I have no desire to mate. I have no desire for companionship. I feel the spark sometimes, the excitement, but it never lasts. I think the long years of being in the iob world has ruined my love for women. I see them now, as pure beings, and they alienated me severely. I dont want my girl to know everything about me, all my secrets , my thoughts etc. Yet my awareness has been so long embedded into the iob world that even outside of it my awareness can get trapped into my old ways. I have spent the last two years fighting to remove my iob awareness and it has been tough. A real struggle. I am so alienated by people. Yes, that is why I have no desire to mate. I found the iob women to be.. well... not my type. I just am not attracted to movers. Oh I do hope that i can remove the rest of iob awareness from my mind and body. Like you say, I have hope.
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I like that you taught me something here. You showed me that if I have the desire for happiness then I'm likely not within power. At least not during that moment when I desire happiness. Like you also mention, power can be held in partial increments. That's something I haven't given much thought to either. I don't think it was wrong of you to move or control people, but what do I know xD
I don't know if you can completely rid yourself of that iob effect. It's a form of knowledge which once gained isn't removed. Maybe it can be denied. I'm very alienated by people too. I prefer to be solitary, unless I'm out having an adventure. Those become tiresome eventually.
I'm curious, you and I went at it for a while. Yet we both see (I'm positive you see, I eventually noticed it within your music videos). How did you finally decide to use humor? There came a point when you said something so random I completely stopped. I stopped because you had me laughing. I felt when your shifted into playfulness. What made you willing to engage me in being equally random and outrageous? I really enjoyed when it turned in that direction.
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Before I write anything too amazing or insightful... I wanted to discuss something with you. [no impacted bowels---> the great sh*ttter]
Power comes from the ability to delete the self. There's an emptiness. [true, but emptiness perceived is SENSATIONAL]
Those with power have been repeatedly reminded they are alone in the world. [that needs to be interpreted and rephrased backwards]
They are so alone they soon realize no matter their actions they will never feel closeness. [I am authentic; I passionately celebrate aloneness with you (formless -ART- formed)]
They wind up giving up entirely. Hope, when they discover it, brings them back to life. [hopelessness is in many forms---> despair, dying, dark night, loss, excess, shame, rejection, etc.
Hope is a pseudo narrative that departs from essential awareness]
The potential for closeness is dangerous. [dangerous to who? LOL]
For a powerful person, to believe they can possess love changes their world. [a powerful person CHOOSES love ('if possessing,' this is actual & not stagnant)] [Add: I desire to possess you.. OH..I do!]
Should that be stripped away they are then reduced to emptiness once again. [emptiness is not inclusive or exclusive of ANYTHING]
Without hope. It's great for power, but it's hopeless for finding a reason to engage others. [primitive phenomenology and arising clarity in authentic aloneness says otherwise]
People enjoy elitism when it's impersonal. [nothing is not personal/smile]
Anything else and it makes powerful people targets. [or conversely then, are you the target?]
Many pursue power mistakenly thinking it will save them (taking them past the eagle). [one awaits (stalking/choosing) power, not pursues it]
What they don't realize is only the most lost enter power. [true, until it's acquired]
grand goal until a person learns of the requirement to hold power: a squeaky clean vessel, one void of love, hope, and dreams. ['until?' Huh? the singularity of such power is awesome.
Yes, it is frightful to stop the world and create 'indiscriminately.' Can you walk that 'frightful' edge with me? (BIG smile)]
If there is no self then love, hope, and dreams have no home to reside. [the key here is to know, love and celibrate one's empty aloneness in the simple, pure awareness that makes such possible]
Power is only held by those who achieve such a fate. [yes, but standing tall in my deathground I AM more powerful than fate]
Sometimes they manage to move closer to humane exchanges, but sooner or later they realize why it's dangerous to embrace hope. [Sheesh.. do away with hope already.. Say what you really mean]
They ultimately retreat back into the folds where the only people who could possibly find them would have no desire to find them. It's a pitiful existence. [OMG!! I am laughing like crazy. THIS? THIS? ... THE crux of the matter]
I HAVE MORE PASSION & DESIRE THAN EVERYONE HERE IN AGGREGATE HAS !! YOU ARE AFRAID OF BEING REJECTED IN HIGH STAKES!!
With this cheery thought in mind, I'm sharing this because you should know you're not missing out on anything. [you could not possibly know this]
You should never choose to enter power. [one awaits, chooses, masters power (what is this enter sh*t?)]
Only if circumstances force you into power should you accept it. [I am going to force you into power.. smh]
No one tells you how to apply power either. You just pick how and make up your own rules. [Phhhttt.. throw maturity & grounding out the door... is that what you think? $+%%!$+!]
Given the lack of self, there's no real point to using power so the neat things most envision achieving with power become irrelevant. ['neat things' are secondary to the larger vision.. I'd really like to smack you around for saying something so f*cking lame..]
My point is you should be made aware of the risks and to be told it's not what many have been lead to believe. [as to serloco, he temporarily mistook acquisition apart from the 'spiritual' base in his aloneness/decisionality... I don't separate those]
Those who do make connections do it in hopes of helping others find the freedom they themselves lack. It's actually a cruel joke. [freedom enhances dream fulfillment.. since you don't know freedom from your $+%%!$+- STOP]
Please don't feel like you require power to live a fulfilling life. Life is only fulfilling when you live outside of power, not inside it.
On the other hand, if you're forced into power I think it's nice to have another to share in that experience. Having to discover it alone only adds acid to the wound. It doesn't really make a difference, it just makes it so much more difficult to find your way out. [where do you get this trash?]
You strike me as the type who will be forced into power, but I hope youll be bumped out once you arrive. You wouldn't enjoy it, but you'll know its taste and will have a greater command of it even after you exit (if you decide to exit).
I have a lot respect for what you've already endured. I have even greater respect for you now. You've chosen happiness and found it. I've been wishing on shooting stars and birthday candles since my teens for what you found. I would trade every ability I have for the opportunity you have now. [REALLY NOW]
If I can offer you any advice, appreciate every single moment with her. Most don't realize what they have until it's gone. Realize what you have while you have it. [I erased a PM about this.. to be explained later, crybaby]
By the way, though legit, I did not expect a yes. Personally, I had no want to be in Vegas. I don't even gamble. Susan had been to the Wynn with my daughter and liked it.
We'll meet when it's time. 'Not ever' is a long time/ lots of smiles. (I will think about disappearing again so you and serloco may continue without interference)
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I wouldnt go as so far as to say that with power you cant desire happiness. Power, ultimately, is free. You can, with power, form yourself in any way you desire. I just know that with total power you are as you say selfless, and you have no true volition and thus no desire.
I do hope I can rid myself of the iob awareness. I wont give up either. I believe anything is possible.
I dont really know why I used humor. I would have to say I intended for the argument to stop and so I followed spirit. Being humorous is something I enjoy very much and I always intend to get better at it. I liked you and was also angry at you and just wanted to get along. I think the Spirit guided me along this course. I often find it is the nagual that makes me funny. I find myself making jokes almost automatically as if it comes from beyond myself.
This is what I know about controlling and moving people. I formed all kinds of knowledge for control and empowered it every step of the way. Sooner or later that knowledge found its way into other people's hands. Sure enough found what it was like to be controlled and moved. I hated every moment of it. I find that it is wrong to do because I do not like it done to me. I follow Jesus' teaching that states to do onto others as you would have done onto you. Now I know that allies (iobs) have no volition and thus you must give them volition of your own but I find myself treating my allies as equals to myself. That is the volition I would want to have. I make them untellable, uncontrolled, and as free as I can set them to be.
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Serloco,
Before I write anything too amazing or insightful... I wanted to discuss something with you. Power comes from the ability to delete the self. There's an emptiness. Those with power have been repeatedly reminded they are alone in the world. They are so alone they soon realize no matter their actions they will never feel closeness. They wind up giving up entirely. Hope, when they discover it, brings them back to life. The potential for closeness is dangerous. For a powerful person, to believe they can possess love changes their world. Should that be stripped away they are then reduced to emptiness once again. Without hope. It's great for power, but it's hopeless for finding a reason to engage others. People enjoy elitism when it's impersonal. Anything else and it makes powerful people targets. Many pursue power mistakenly thinking it will save them (taking them past the eagle). What they don't realize is only the most lost enter power. A grand goal until a person learns of the requirement to hold power: a squeaky clean vessel, one void of love, hope, and dreams. If there is no self then love, hope, and dreams have no home to reside. Power is only held by those who achieve such a fate. Sometimes they manage to move closer to humane exchanges, but sooner or later they realize why it's dangerous to embrace hope. They ultimately retreat back into the folds where the only people who could possibly find them would have no desire to find them. It's a pitiful existence.
With this cheery thought in mind, I'm sharing this because you should know you're not missing out on anything. You should never choose to enter power. Only if circumstances force you into power should you accept it. No one tells you how to apply power either. You just pick how and make up your own rules. Given the lack of self, there's no real point to using power so the neat things most envision achieving with power become irrelevant.
My point is you should be made aware of the risks and to be told it's not what many have been lead to believe. Those who do make connections do it in hopes of helping others find the freedom they themselves lack. It's actually a cruel joke. Please don't feel like you require power to live a fulfilling life. Life is only fulfilling when you live outside of power, not inside it. On the other hand, if you're forced into power I think it's nice to have another to share in that experience. Having to discover it alone only adds acid to the wound. It doesn't really make a difference, it just makes it so much more difficult to find your way out.
You strike me as the type who will be forced into power, but I hope youll be bumped out once you arrive. You wouldn't enjoy it, but you'll know its taste and will have a greater command of it even after you exit (if you decide to exit).
I have a lot respect for what you've already endured. I have even greater respect for you now. You've chosen happiness and found it. I've been wishing on shooting stars and birthday candles since my teens for what you found. I would trade every ability I have for the opportunity you have now. If I can offer you any advice, appreciate every single moment with her. Most don't realize what they have until it's gone. Realize what you have while you have it.
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Yes I understand that without a self you have no true volition. That is why Silvio Manuel had don Juan to guide his volition. Being the full will of the world removes such volition. He found himself not wanting to do anything at all even tho he could do anything. He had no desires and no wants. I have been very close to this position however I always leave myself a small amount of volition.
I am happy because I have great things to look forward to in my life. Things I want to do and things i want to accomplish. I wouldnt want to lose that. I was King of my world for many years. I can control people and make them move to my will. I have a great deal of personal power. HOwever as you say I lost the desire for power. I dont want to control someone anymore. I dont want to create new worlds. I have lost all my desire for the things that used to drive me. I want a long and healthy life. I am sick of seeing people "move" under my command. It makes me sick. Its ugly and its wrong. I dont enjoy working with volitionless allies anymore although in the beginning it brought me total control and power. I loved every minute and taking over the world was a daily routine. Seeking power over everything was what used to drive me. Nowadays I want to meet someone and love them for who THEY are. Not because of my will to make them what I want. It sounds like a dream to me. I have been telling people for so long what to do , what to think, how to be. Nowadays I am repulsed by all my old powers.
Truth is I dont feel love for any woman. I do not crave it anymore. It is a novel idea I know, and I think I should but truthfully I lose interest so fast. The fact is I am a seer. I see most often. And when I am seeing I have no desire to mate. I have no desire for companionship. I feel the spark sometimes, the excitement, but it never lasts. I think the long years of being in the iob world has ruined my love for women. I see them now, as pure beings, and they alienated me severely. I dont want my girl to know everything about me, all my secrets , my thoughts etc. Yet my awareness has been so long embedded into the iob world that even outside of it my awareness can get trapped into my old ways. I have spent the last two years fighting to remove my iob awareness and it has been tough. A real struggle. I am so alienated by people. Yes, that is why I have no desire to mate. I found the iob women to be.. well... not my type. I just am not attracted to movers. Oh I do hope that i can remove the rest of iob awareness from my mind and body. Like you say, I have hope.
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I like that you taught me something here. You showed me that if I have the desire for happiness then I'm likely not within power. At least not during that moment when I desire happiness. Like you also mention, power can be held in partial increments. That's something I haven't given much thought to either. I don't think it was wrong of you to move or control people, but what do I know xD
I don't know if you can completely rid yourself of that iob effect. It's a form of knowledge which once gained isn't removed. Maybe it can be denied. I'm very alienated by people too. I prefer to be solitary, unless I'm out having an adventure. Those become tiresome eventually.
I'm curious, you and I went at it for a while. Yet we both see (I'm positive you see, I eventually noticed it within your music videos). How did you finally decide to use humor? There came a point when you said something so random I completely stopped. I stopped because you had me laughing. I felt when your shifted into playfulness. What made you willing to engage me in being equally random and outrageous? I really enjoyed when it turned in that direction.
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Threads: 0
Joined: Feb 2019
Before I write anything too amazing or insightful... I wanted to discuss something with you. [no impacted bowels---> the great sh*ttter]
Power comes from the ability to delete the self. There's an emptiness. [true, but emptiness perceived is SENSATIONAL]
Those with power have been repeatedly reminded they are alone in the world. [that needs to be interpreted and rephrased backwards]
They are so alone they soon realize no matter their actions they will never feel closeness. [I am authentic; I passionately celebrate aloneness with you (formless -ART- formed)]
They wind up giving up entirely. Hope, when they discover it, brings them back to life. [hopelessness is in many forms---> despair, dying, dark night, loss, excess, shame, rejection, etc.
Hope is a pseudo narrative that departs from essential awareness]
The potential for closeness is dangerous. [dangerous to who? LOL]
For a powerful person, to believe they can possess love changes their world. [a powerful person CHOOSES love ('if possessing,' this is actual & not stagnant)] [Add: I desire to possess you.. OH..I do!]
Should that be stripped away they are then reduced to emptiness once again. [emptiness is not inclusive or exclusive of ANYTHING]
Without hope. It's great for power, but it's hopeless for finding a reason to engage others. [primitive phenomenology and arising clarity in authentic aloneness says otherwise]
People enjoy elitism when it's impersonal. [nothing is not personal/smile]
Anything else and it makes powerful people targets. [or conversely then, are you the target?]
Many pursue power mistakenly thinking it will save them (taking them past the eagle). [one awaits (stalking/choosing) power, not pursues it]
What they don't realize is only the most lost enter power. [true, until it's acquired]
grand goal until a person learns of the requirement to hold power: a squeaky clean vessel, one void of love, hope, and dreams. ['until?' Huh? the singularity of such power is awesome.
Yes, it is frightful to stop the world and create 'indiscriminately.' Can you walk that 'frightful' edge with me? (BIG smile)]
If there is no self then love, hope, and dreams have no home to reside. [the key here is to know, love and celibrate one's empty aloneness in the simple, pure awareness that makes such possible]
Power is only held by those who achieve such a fate. [yes, but standing tall in my deathground I AM more powerful than fate]
Sometimes they manage to move closer to humane exchanges, but sooner or later they realize why it's dangerous to embrace hope. [Sheesh.. do away with hope already.. Say what you really mean]
They ultimately retreat back into the folds where the only people who could possibly find them would have no desire to find them. It's a pitiful existence. [OMG!! I am laughing like crazy. THIS? THIS? ... THE crux of the matter]
I HAVE MORE PASSION & DESIRE THAN EVERYONE HERE IN AGGREGATE HAS !! YOU ARE AFRAID OF BEING REJECTED IN HIGH STAKES!!
With this cheery thought in mind, I'm sharing this because you should know you're not missing out on anything. [you could not possibly know this]
You should never choose to enter power. [one awaits, chooses, masters power (what is this enter sh*t?)]
Only if circumstances force you into power should you accept it. [I am going to force you into power.. smh]
No one tells you how to apply power either. You just pick how and make up your own rules. [Phhhttt.. throw maturity & grounding out the door... is that what you think? $+%%!$+!]
Given the lack of self, there's no real point to using power so the neat things most envision achieving with power become irrelevant. ['neat things' are secondary to the larger vision.. I'd really like to smack you around for saying something so f*cking lame..]
My point is you should be made aware of the risks and to be told it's not what many have been lead to believe. [as to serloco, he temporarily mistook acquisition apart from the 'spiritual' base in his aloneness/decisionality... I don't separate those]
Those who do make connections do it in hopes of helping others find the freedom they themselves lack. It's actually a cruel joke. [freedom enhances dream fulfillment.. since you don't know freedom from your $+%%!$+- STOP]
Please don't feel like you require power to live a fulfilling life. Life is only fulfilling when you live outside of power, not inside it.
On the other hand, if you're forced into power I think it's nice to have another to share in that experience. Having to discover it alone only adds acid to the wound. It doesn't really make a difference, it just makes it so much more difficult to find your way out. [where do you get this trash?]
You strike me as the type who will be forced into power, but I hope youll be bumped out once you arrive. You wouldn't enjoy it, but you'll know its taste and will have a greater command of it even after you exit (if you decide to exit).
I have a lot respect for what you've already endured. I have even greater respect for you now. You've chosen happiness and found it. I've been wishing on shooting stars and birthday candles since my teens for what you found. I would trade every ability I have for the opportunity you have now. [REALLY NOW]
If I can offer you any advice, appreciate every single moment with her. Most don't realize what they have until it's gone. Realize what you have while you have it. [I erased a PM about this.. to be explained later, crybaby]
By the way, though legit, I did not expect a yes. Personally, I had no want to be in Vegas. I don't even gamble. Susan had been to the Wynn with my daughter and liked it.
We'll meet when it's time. 'Not ever' is a long time/ lots of smiles. (I will think about disappearing again so you and serloco may continue without interference)
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I wouldnt go as so far as to say that with power you cant desire happiness. Power, ultimately, is free. You can, with power, form yourself in any way you desire. I just know that with total power you are as you say selfless, and you have no true volition and thus no desire.
I do hope I can rid myself of the iob awareness. I wont give up either. I believe anything is possible.
I dont really know why I used humor. I would have to say I intended for the argument to stop and so I followed spirit. Being humorous is something I enjoy very much and I always intend to get better at it. I liked you and was also angry at you and just wanted to get along. I think the Spirit guided me along this course. I often find it is the nagual that makes me funny. I find myself making jokes almost automatically as if it comes from beyond myself.
This is what I know about controlling and moving people. I formed all kinds of knowledge for control and empowered it every step of the way. Sooner or later that knowledge found its way into other people's hands. Sure enough found what it was like to be controlled and moved. I hated every moment of it. I find that it is wrong to do because I do not like it done to me. I follow Jesus' teaching that states to do onto others as you would have done onto you. Now I know that allies (iobs) have no volition and thus you must give them volition of your own but I find myself treating my allies as equals to myself. That is the volition I would want to have. I make them untellable, uncontrolled, and as free as I can set them to be.
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Threads: 0
Joined: Feb 2019
Serloco,
Before I write anything too amazing or insightful... I wanted to discuss something with you. Power comes from the ability to delete the self. There's an emptiness. Those with power have been repeatedly reminded they are alone in the world. They are so alone they soon realize no matter their actions they will never feel closeness. They wind up giving up entirely. Hope, when they discover it, brings them back to life. The potential for closeness is dangerous. For a powerful person, to believe they can possess love changes their world. Should that be stripped away they are then reduced to emptiness once again. Without hope. It's great for power, but it's hopeless for finding a reason to engage others. People enjoy elitism when it's impersonal. Anything else and it makes powerful people targets. Many pursue power mistakenly thinking it will save them (taking them past the eagle). What they don't realize is only the most lost enter power. A grand goal until a person learns of the requirement to hold power: a squeaky clean vessel, one void of love, hope, and dreams. If there is no self then love, hope, and dreams have no home to reside. Power is only held by those who achieve such a fate. Sometimes they manage to move closer to humane exchanges, but sooner or later they realize why it's dangerous to embrace hope. They ultimately retreat back into the folds where the only people who could possibly find them would have no desire to find them. It's a pitiful existence.
With this cheery thought in mind, I'm sharing this because you should know you're not missing out on anything. You should never choose to enter power. Only if circumstances force you into power should you accept it. No one tells you how to apply power either. You just pick how and make up your own rules. Given the lack of self, there's no real point to using power so the neat things most envision achieving with power become irrelevant.
My point is you should be made aware of the risks and to be told it's not what many have been lead to believe. Those who do make connections do it in hopes of helping others find the freedom they themselves lack. It's actually a cruel joke. Please don't feel like you require power to live a fulfilling life. Life is only fulfilling when you live outside of power, not inside it. On the other hand, if you're forced into power I think it's nice to have another to share in that experience. Having to discover it alone only adds acid to the wound. It doesn't really make a difference, it just makes it so much more difficult to find your way out.
You strike me as the type who will be forced into power, but I hope youll be bumped out once you arrive. You wouldn't enjoy it, but you'll know its taste and will have a greater command of it even after you exit (if you decide to exit).
I have a lot respect for what you've already endured. I have even greater respect for you now. You've chosen happiness and found it. I've been wishing on shooting stars and birthday candles since my teens for what you found. I would trade every ability I have for the opportunity you have now. If I can offer you any advice, appreciate every single moment with her. Most don't realize what they have until it's gone. Realize what you have while you have it.
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Threads: 0
Joined: Feb 2019
Yes I understand that without a self you have no true volition. That is why Silvio Manuel had don Juan to guide his volition. Being the full will of the world removes such volition. He found himself not wanting to do anything at all even tho he could do anything. He had no desires and no wants. I have been very close to this position however I always leave myself a small amount of volition.
I am happy because I have great things to look forward to in my life. Things I want to do and things i want to accomplish. I wouldnt want to lose that. I was King of my world for many years. I can control people and make them move to my will. I have a great deal of personal power. HOwever as you say I lost the desire for power. I dont want to control someone anymore. I dont want to create new worlds. I have lost all my desire for the things that used to drive me. I want a long and healthy life. I am sick of seeing people "move" under my command. It makes me sick. Its ugly and its wrong. I dont enjoy working with volitionless allies anymore although in the beginning it brought me total control and power. I loved every minute and taking over the world was a daily routine. Seeking power over everything was what used to drive me. Nowadays I want to meet someone and love them for who THEY are. Not because of my will to make them what I want. It sounds like a dream to me. I have been telling people for so long what to do , what to think, how to be. Nowadays I am repulsed by all my old powers.
Truth is I dont feel love for any woman. I do not crave it anymore. It is a novel idea I know, and I think I should but truthfully I lose interest so fast. The fact is I am a seer. I see most often. And when I am seeing I have no desire to mate. I have no desire for companionship. I feel the spark sometimes, the excitement, but it never lasts. I think the long years of being in the iob world has ruined my love for women. I see them now, as pure beings, and they alienated me severely. I dont want my girl to know everything about me, all my secrets , my thoughts etc. Yet my awareness has been so long embedded into the iob world that even outside of it my awareness can get trapped into my old ways. I have spent the last two years fighting to remove my iob awareness and it has been tough. A real struggle. I am so alienated by people. Yes, that is why I have no desire to mate. I found the iob women to be.. well... not my type. I just am not attracted to movers. Oh I do hope that i can remove the rest of iob awareness from my mind and body. Like you say, I have hope.
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I like that you taught me something here. You showed me that if I have the desire for happiness then I'm likely not within power. At least not during that moment when I desire happiness. Like you also mention, power can be held in partial increments. That's something I haven't given much thought to either. I don't think it was wrong of you to move or control people, but what do I know xD
I don't know if you can completely rid yourself of that iob effect. It's a form of knowledge which once gained isn't removed. Maybe it can be denied. I'm very alienated by people too. I prefer to be solitary, unless I'm out having an adventure. Those become tiresome eventually.
I'm curious, you and I went at it for a while. Yet we both see (I'm positive you see, I eventually noticed it within your music videos). How did you finally decide to use humor? There came a point when you said something so random I completely stopped. I stopped because you had me laughing. I felt when your shifted into playfulness. What made you willing to engage me in being equally random and outrageous? I really enjoyed when it turned in that direction.
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Before I write anything too amazing or insightful... I wanted to discuss something with you. [no impacted bowels---> the great sh*ttter]
Power comes from the ability to delete the self. There's an emptiness. [true, but emptiness perceived is SENSATIONAL]
Those with power have been repeatedly reminded they are alone in the world. [that needs to be interpreted and rephrased backwards]
They are so alone they soon realize no matter their actions they will never feel closeness. [I am authentic; I passionately celebrate aloneness with you (formless -ART- formed)]
They wind up giving up entirely. Hope, when they discover it, brings them back to life. [hopelessness is in many forms---> despair, dying, dark night, loss, excess, shame, rejection, etc.
Hope is a pseudo narrative that departs from essential awareness]
The potential for closeness is dangerous. [dangerous to who? LOL]
For a powerful person, to believe they can possess love changes their world. [a powerful person CHOOSES love ('if possessing,' this is actual & not stagnant)] [Add: I desire to possess you.. OH..I do!]
Should that be stripped away they are then reduced to emptiness once again. [emptiness is not inclusive or exclusive of ANYTHING]
Without hope. It's great for power, but it's hopeless for finding a reason to engage others. [primitive phenomenology and arising clarity in authentic aloneness says otherwise]
People enjoy elitism when it's impersonal. [nothing is not personal/smile]
Anything else and it makes powerful people targets. [or conversely then, are you the target?]
Many pursue power mistakenly thinking it will save them (taking them past the eagle). [one awaits (stalking/choosing) power, not pursues it]
What they don't realize is only the most lost enter power. [true, until it's acquired]
grand goal until a person learns of the requirement to hold power: a squeaky clean vessel, one void of love, hope, and dreams. ['until?' Huh? the singularity of such power is awesome.
Yes, it is frightful to stop the world and create 'indiscriminately.' Can you walk that 'frightful' edge with me? (BIG smile)]
If there is no self then love, hope, and dreams have no home to reside. [the key here is to know, love and celibrate one's empty aloneness in the simple, pure awareness that makes such possible]
Power is only held by those who achieve such a fate. [yes, but standing tall in my deathground I AM more powerful than fate]
Sometimes they manage to move closer to humane exchanges, but sooner or later they realize why it's dangerous to embrace hope. [Sheesh.. do away with hope already.. Say what you really mean]
They ultimately retreat back into the folds where the only people who could possibly find them would have no desire to find them. It's a pitiful existence. [OMG!! I am laughing like crazy. THIS? THIS? ... THE crux of the matter]
I HAVE MORE PASSION & DESIRE THAN EVERYONE HERE IN AGGREGATE HAS !! YOU ARE AFRAID OF BEING REJECTED IN HIGH STAKES!!
With this cheery thought in mind, I'm sharing this because you should know you're not missing out on anything. [you could not possibly know this]
You should never choose to enter power. [one awaits, chooses, masters power (what is this enter sh*t?)]
Only if circumstances force you into power should you accept it. [I am going to force you into power.. smh]
No one tells you how to apply power either. You just pick how and make up your own rules. [Phhhttt.. throw maturity & grounding out the door... is that what you think? $+%%!$+!]
Given the lack of self, there's no real point to using power so the neat things most envision achieving with power become irrelevant. ['neat things' are secondary to the larger vision.. I'd really like to smack you around for saying something so f*cking lame..]
My point is you should be made aware of the risks and to be told it's not what many have been lead to believe. [as to serloco, he temporarily mistook acquisition apart from the 'spiritual' base in his aloneness/decisionality... I don't separate those]
Those who do make connections do it in hopes of helping others find the freedom they themselves lack. It's actually a cruel joke. [freedom enhances dream fulfillment.. since you don't know freedom from your $+%%!$+- STOP]
Please don't feel like you require power to live a fulfilling life. Life is only fulfilling when you live outside of power, not inside it.
On the other hand, if you're forced into power I think it's nice to have another to share in that experience. Having to discover it alone only adds acid to the wound. It doesn't really make a difference, it just makes it so much more difficult to find your way out. [where do you get this trash?]
You strike me as the type who will be forced into power, but I hope youll be bumped out once you arrive. You wouldn't enjoy it, but you'll know its taste and will have a greater command of it even after you exit (if you decide to exit).
I have a lot respect for what you've already endured. I have even greater respect for you now. You've chosen happiness and found it. I've been wishing on shooting stars and birthday candles since my teens for what you found. I would trade every ability I have for the opportunity you have now. [REALLY NOW]
If I can offer you any advice, appreciate every single moment with her. Most don't realize what they have until it's gone. Realize what you have while you have it. [I erased a PM about this.. to be explained later, crybaby]
By the way, though legit, I did not expect a yes. Personally, I had no want to be in Vegas. I don't even gamble. Susan had been to the Wynn with my daughter and liked it.
We'll meet when it's time. 'Not ever' is a long time/ lots of smiles. (I will think about disappearing again so you and serloco may continue without interference)
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I wouldnt go as so far as to say that with power you cant desire happiness. Power, ultimately, is free. You can, with power, form yourself in any way you desire. I just know that with total power you are as you say selfless, and you have no true volition and thus no desire.
I do hope I can rid myself of the iob awareness. I wont give up either. I believe anything is possible.
I dont really know why I used humor. I would have to say I intended for the argument to stop and so I followed spirit. Being humorous is something I enjoy very much and I always intend to get better at it. I liked you and was also angry at you and just wanted to get along. I think the Spirit guided me along this course. I often find it is the nagual that makes me funny. I find myself making jokes almost automatically as if it comes from beyond myself.
This is what I know about controlling and moving people. I formed all kinds of knowledge for control and empowered it every step of the way. Sooner or later that knowledge found its way into other people's hands. Sure enough found what it was like to be controlled and moved. I hated every moment of it. I find that it is wrong to do because I do not like it done to me. I follow Jesus' teaching that states to do onto others as you would have done onto you. Now I know that allies (iobs) have no volition and thus you must give them volition of your own but I find myself treating my allies as equals to myself. That is the volition I would want to have. I make them untellable, uncontrolled, and as free as I can set them to be.
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serloco: "I just know that with total power you are as you say selfless, and you have no true volition and thus no desire."
The TASTY space of 'total power' ---> the void absent of SELF, of volition, and of desire is my FUC*ING HOME. When I come out, I AM DESIRE.. my SELF and INTENT is without limitation.
I manifest in ways that would be inconceivable even just a few years ago.
...to be erased
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Hey Billy boy, so what do you do with that power?
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I remind you to be careful how you set your own awareness, duh.
What I do with my power:
First and foremost, I freely imbibe the energies of my PC knowing the clout of my intent!! .. such luscious, decadent PLAY.
I stalk myself.
I enjoy my FUC*ING HOME I spoke of. The highes are great, and I often SEE a new bridge through the windows.
I preserve my wife's equanimity (having instated such) and occasionally fix my wife when she reverts back to the petty tyrant days.
I stop the world more often now---> change attentions or channels to refresh the view.
I maintain a variety of disciplines that were initiated with my power (example: I've manicured my nails without fail over half year now, after biting them for five decades)
(a few other examples: I mediatate daily, something I could not do for even 10 minutes ever........ I stretch and exercise daily, something I hadn't done for four decades...... I contol my libido, something I had NEVER done... I now pay attention to dreaming; I had never done that, even when in RF....... I pay attention to my body, and clarity of mind, and how I am occupying myself .... I increasingly accentuate unmitigated awareness....etc. etc)
I please my wife. I'm her daddy now .
I help my Flyers.
I move into meditation with ease.
I easily access two allies now. {a year ago I had no idea what an ally was-- & one of them wants me to stalk my PC cruelly (she really likes her though)}.
Some things I've done with my power in the last couple years:
Totally removed arthritis I had in right hip for two decades.
Totally removed two flat dime sized moles via gazing exercises (they inexplicably began shrivelling (two weeks), and I simply pinched a dry fold and off it came with no trace (two days).
I mended the relation with my daughter which was untenable.
I learned to dominate Susan.
My body simply became forever spry upon my intent.
I became a death defier.
I perfected 'unconcern' of conditionality after consistently turning pain into pleasure.
I rather easily dismissed all family and personal ties.
I am whole and integrate each moment. I am absurdly happy (I wonder why?) I cannot wait.
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Thats quite the tally.
And what are you waiting for?
Why should I be careful how I set my intent? I am no spring chicken!
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As of now, I've restricted Billy's ability to reply in The Bonsai Garden due to the higher expectation regarding discussion quality. He also addressed me when he understands that restriction is also in effect. He is able to read this section (unless you prefer to restrict that too).
I'll reply in the morning when I'm more rested
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serloco: "I just know that with total power you are as you say selfless, and you have no true volition and thus no desire."
The TASTY space of 'total power' ---> the void absent of SELF, of volition, and of desire is my FUC*ING HOME. When I come out, I AM DESIRE.. my SELF and INTENT is without limitation.
I manifest in ways that would be inconceivable even just a few years ago.
...to be erased
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Joined: Feb 2019
Hey Billy boy, so what do you do with that power?
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I remind you to be careful how you set your own awareness, duh.
What I do with my power:
First and foremost, I freely imbibe the energies of my PC knowing the clout of my intent!! .. such luscious, decadent PLAY.
I stalk myself.
I enjoy my FUC*ING HOME I spoke of. The highes are great, and I often SEE a new bridge through the windows.
I preserve my wife's equanimity (having instated such) and occasionally fix my wife when she reverts back to the petty tyrant days.
I stop the world more often now---> change attentions or channels to refresh the view.
I maintain a variety of disciplines that were initiated with my power (example: I've manicured my nails without fail over half year now, after biting them for five decades)
(a few other examples: I mediatate daily, something I could not do for even 10 minutes ever........ I stretch and exercise daily, something I hadn't done for four decades...... I contol my libido, something I had NEVER done... I now pay attention to dreaming; I had never done that, even when in RF....... I pay attention to my body, and clarity of mind, and how I am occupying myself .... I increasingly accentuate unmitigated awareness....etc. etc)
I please my wife. I'm her daddy now .
I help my Flyers.
I move into meditation with ease.
I easily access two allies now. {a year ago I had no idea what an ally was-- & one of them wants me to stalk my PC cruelly (she really likes her though)}.
Some things I've done with my power in the last couple years:
Totally removed arthritis I had in right hip for two decades.
Totally removed two flat dime sized moles via gazing exercises (they inexplicably began shrivelling (two weeks), and I simply pinched a dry fold and off it came with no trace (two days).
I mended the relation with my daughter which was untenable.
I learned to dominate Susan.
My body simply became forever spry upon my intent.
I became a death defier.
I perfected 'unconcern' of conditionality after consistently turning pain into pleasure.
I rather easily dismissed all family and personal ties.
I am whole and integrate each moment. I am absurdly happy (I wonder why?) I cannot wait.
Posts: 0
Threads: 0
Joined: Feb 2019
Thats quite the tally.
And what are you waiting for?
Why should I be careful how I set my intent? I am no spring chicken!
Posts: 0
Threads: 0
Joined: Feb 2019
As of now, I've restricted Billy's ability to reply in The Bonsai Garden due to the higher expectation regarding discussion quality. He also addressed me when he understands that restriction is also in effect. He is able to read this section (unless you prefer to restrict that too).
I'll reply in the morning when I'm more rested
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