Casual Conversation

[Billy]

I have not a clue hardly, but I am going to a wedding reception in twenty minutes.  And, I am thinking I am going to find out.

[serloco]

billy wrote:I have not a clue hardly, but I am going to a wedding reception in twenty minutes.  And, I am thinking I am going to find out.1.
maca pimp or playa or mackin on sumone to put your moves on her
damn son ur a mak daddy 
whatch me mac on dis gurl
*checks into his tunes.*
*song comes on*performed by J-Roc, Justin TimberLake and Timberland. Space-ship Coupe
Annotate[Intro]Hey, yeah, yeahHey, I wrote this song for youListen
[Verse 1]Everybody's looking for the fliest thing to say (fliest thing to say)But I just want to fly (fly away with you, you, you, you)I don't want to be the one to alienate, yeah (alienate)You see, I'm trying to find an alien in you (you, you, if it's cool, cool)
[Pre-Hook]We can't take an airplaneWhere we're going is way too highGoing where the day sky turns into nightI got the windows special tinted for the stars that get too brightAnd I saved you a seat, so let's ride
[Hook]Hop into my spaceship coupeThere's only room for two (Me and you)And with the top downWe'll cruise aroundLand and make love on the moonWould you like that?
Hop into my spaceship coupeThere's only room for two (Me and you)And with the top off, you're all wrapped upIn my space lover cocoon
And I love it when I hear you sayOoh, ooh, ooh, ooh, oohOoh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
Sing to me
I love it when I hear you sayOoh, ooh, ooh, ooh, oohOoh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
Sing to me
[Verse 2]Now everybody knows that you're from outer space (outer space)But Honey, I just want to turn out this space with you (you, you, you, you)So drive me to your galaxy where I could play, yeah (that milky way)And sugar I'll take my timeAnd show you the backseat view, view, if it's cool, cool
[Pre-Hook]
[Hook]
Now break it down
Hey...This is the partWhere you and me and all of the stars collide tonightThis is the partWe take offAnd then we fly far away, far away, far away
[Hook]
[Outro]Baby, can't you see all the stars?They shine, they shineJust for youI said oh, yeah, yeahJust hop into my spaceship coupeI saved a seat for youRight here next to meI'm going to take you to the moonAnd I'm going to make you say
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, oohOoh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
I love it when I hear you sayOoh, ooh, ooh, ooh, oohOoh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
And you love it when I make you sayOoh, ooh, ooh, ooh, oohOoh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
Baby this is the partWhere you and me and all of the stars collide tonightThis is the partWhere we take offAnd then we fly far away, far away, far away...

[serloco]

serloco wrote:MAC Wonder Woman1.

mac
a pimp or playa or mackin on sumone to put your moves on her

damn son ur a mak daddy 

whatch me mac on dis gurl

*checks into his tunes.*

*song comes on*
performed by J-Roc, Justin TimberLake and Timberland. 
Space-ship Coupe

Annotate[Intro]
Hey, yeah, yeah
Hey, I wrote this song for you
Listen

[Verse 1]
Everybody's looking for the fliest thing to say (fliest thing to say)
But I just want to fly (fly away with you, you, you, you)
I don't want to be the one to alienate, yeah (alienate)
You see, I'm trying to find an alien in you (you, you, if it's cool, cool)

[Pre-Hook]
We can't take an airplane
Where we're going is way too high
Going where the day sky turns into night
I got the windows special tinted for the stars that get too bright
And I saved you a seat, so let's ride

[Hook]
Hop into my spaceship coupe
There's only room for two (Me and you)
And with the top down
We'll cruise around
Land and make love on the moon
Would you like that?

Hop into my spaceship coupe
There's only room for two (Me and you)
And with the top off, you're all wrapped up
In my space lover cocoon

And I love it when I hear you say
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh

Sing to me

I love it when I hear you say
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh

Sing to me

[Verse 2]
Now everybody knows that you're from outer space (outer space)
But Honey, I just want to turn out this space with you (you, you, you, you)
So drive me to your galaxy where I could play, yeah (that milky way)
And sugar I'll take my time
And show you the backseat view, view, if it's cool, cool

[Pre-Hook]

[Hook]

Now break it down

Hey...
This is the part
Where you and me and all of the stars collide tonight
This is the part
We take off
And then we fly far away, far away, far away

[Hook]

[Outro]
Baby, can't you see all the stars?
They shine, they shine
Just for you
I said oh, yeah, yeah
Just hop into my spaceship coupe
I saved a seat for you
Right here next to me
I'm going to take you to the moon
And I'm going to make you say

Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh

I love it when I hear you say
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh

And you love it when I make you say
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh

Baby this is the part
Where you and me and all of the stars collide tonight
This is the part
Where we take off
And then we fly far away, far away, far away...

[Billy]

It was such a mixed bag at this wedding.  I probably ended relationships with most of my family.  I certainly could add a chapter to my book.  I would say I did good.  It certainly had bizarre moments.  I am officially dubbed crazy.

   These are not happy people.  I know where the conflict comes from.  I have the normal surface resentment: I want to write these people off enthusiastically.  War with one's world is nothing new to me.

   Arrogant people to my thinking.  I am arrogant, but I am right.  I smile even as I KNOW this is true.  I am right (a big smile).

[Billy]

If you meant a literal 'blood letting' I will probably never want to do that.  If meant figuratively, what I did last night was poignant.  IT was a blood letting to be sure.  I loved the blank verses to be filled.  I did go with whatever  The drinking on top made this a surreal affair.  It was ugly in many respects, and many mini plays were involved.  I would say 'truth' unfolded.  I have the 'detached' relation with my wife left, and really none other. 

I AM ALONE.  It's got a few lingering eerie attachments, especially because my daughter is alienated from me and doesn't know what to do.

[Billy]

The daughter relation was the highlight, and was heavily laden with emotions and an open display (public but away from the main 'stage') that lasted at least fifteen minutes.

[Billy]

My daughter will likely marry in the next year or so.  That is a sad mess, because I will probably be excluded or exclude myself.  Still, this was how I played my hand out to be where I am.  I am not beating myself up (YET). I try to smile on that.

[Billy]

The long lyrics that followed blank space I took as meaningless jargon to contrast the blank space (as I said I only had twenty minutes before leaving).  Then, I thought maybe it was a parody on me telling you to listen to rusted root. 

If it was 'serious' info it went by me because I did not look at it as such.  I do best with small bits because I am slow.

[Billy]

AND AFTER ALL THIS--IN THIS PLACE OF PAIN--IS WHERE I WANT TO WRITE A BOOK FROM--  I don't know exactly, but to tell someone else in the loneliness of a a very sad life story--that I KNOW their story--that I KNOW this is virtually everyone's story-- that I'll find a way to be okay here  Better than okay --that it's possible.  OMG

[Billy]

The new standards, springing forward now--- Please elucidate.

[Billy]

You asked, "DO I see them?"   I hardly understand, and would say no.  Am I being affected and watching a change in form---most probably

[Billy]

Castaneda:  A warrior must cultivate the feeling that he has...        the experience of experiences is being alive.

Thank you for awareness to know when and when not.

I will take a few days absence, a few weeks, whatever to enjoy this last week.  Unbelievable serloco.

[serloco]

billy wrote:AND AFTER ALL THIS--IN THIS PLACE OF PAIN--IS WHERE I WANT TO WRITE A BOOK FROM--  I don't know exactly, but to tell someone else in the loneliness of a a very sad life story--that I KNOW their story--that I KNOW this is virtually everyone's story-- that I'll find a way to be okay here  Better than okay --that it's possible.  OMGIn sight, lit up - the silver shadow dances in pain. Sure, she moves, a conduit of this music and so song plays on, this grand stage of any set, any intro, any play..
"Cuz as me the almost-man looks up into that town, I can hear the 146 men who remain. I can hear every ruddy last one of them. Their Noise washes down the hill like a flood let loose right at me, like a fire, like a monster the size of the sky cuz there’s nowhere to run." -The Knife of Never Letting Go 

.

[serloco]

serloco wrote:billy wrote:AND AFTER ALL THIS--IN THIS PLACE OF PAIN--IS WHERE I WANT TO WRITE A BOOK FROM--  I don't know exactly, but to tell someone else in the loneliness of a a very sad life story--that I KNOW their story--that I KNOW this is virtually everyone's story-- that I'll find a way to be okay here  Better than okay --that it's possible.  OMGIn sight, lit up - the silver shadow dances in pain. Sure, she moves, a conduit of this music and so song plays on, this grand stage of any set, any intro, any play..
"Cuz as me the almost-man looks up into that town, I can hear the 146 men who remain. I can hear every ruddy last one of them. Their Noise washes down the hill like a flood let loose right at me, like a fire, like a monster the size of the sky cuz there’s nowhere to run." -The Knife of Never Letting Go 

.
=10px"Cuz as me the almost-man looks up into that town, I can hear the 146 men who remain. I can hear every ruddy last one of them. Their Noise washes down the hill like a flood let loose right at me, like a fire, like a monster the size of the sky cuz there’s nowhere to run." -The Knife of Never Letting Go

[Billy]

billy wrote:AND AFTER ALL THIS--IN THIS PLACE OF PAIN--IS WHERE I WANT TO WRITE A BOOK FROM-- 

OMG did you laugh or want to throw up?  You just cured me of that mellodramatic bullshit. Thanks--I'll try not to ever visit there again.  GOOD FOR YOU MASTER!!!!!!!!

The etymology name game I just got in reason, but need a push to empirically get it.  I tried a little, but am missing the doing.  What I did at this most elegant wedding reception contained the good, the bad and the ugly.  I wish you could have been there.  Things played out unpredictably one scene after another.  All in all as bad as it was 'conventionally' I was pretty okay with it.  AND there were definitely UNEXPECTED TWISTS on the GOOD side. I was so so crass, but brilliant at times too.

This is meant sober (not brag).  I did four LSD trips back in 70's.  What you call synchronicity is apparently a nack I could have.  Everything formed around me for my entertainment and my doing in the most stupendous ways.  I thought you should know that as it might be pertinent. 

I can be slow learning, but when I learn I become very very adept.

[Billy]

billy wrote:billy wrote:AND AFTER ALL THIS--IN THIS PLACE OF PAIN--IS WHERE I WANT TO WRITE A BOOK FROM-- 

OMG did you laugh or want to throw up?  You just cured me of that mellodramatic bullshit. Thanks--I'll try not to ever visit there again.

Bruises,and cuts,and blows.  There are no painkillers.   IF IF I confused you, the mellowdramatic pain and story is fine... It is that I did not have clarity that ALL of this is the stuff of life to be gobbled up.  TASTY.

[Billy]

Often as I shake with fear in those FormALL boots.

[Billy]

Serloco, I finally understand PERFECTLY what was happening at the wedding reception.  Once I made up my mind to project my world AND DID NOT BACK DOWN people were stuck (or I stuck them in rolls of old imaging).

The persons that stole my energy, even my dignity, were completely afraid and went on the offensive, and from what I know behind my back.  What happened as it unfolded should have mortified me, but these sisters with money and reputation defining my place DID NOT HAPPEN.

I could not understand why my wife acted exactly the opposite of what I would expect (A linear movement starting with anger towards tomorrow's divorce papers)  NO, I scared the people shitless that were my confrontations, and lifted the person's who were genuine goodness to me high to the sky.

   When my wife tried to move back the other direction of usual disrespect, I vocalized the flavor of the situation above, and realized to stay my position.  THAT is when it became crystal clear.  The confrontation with my daughter was messy, BUT she would not leave me go-- AND finally hugged me-- something I tried to get from her for many years. 

    I kept telling myself if I had to do it over, I would have done EVERYTHING exactly the same.  I realized WHY that was true.   JESUS FUCKING CHRIST (LAUGHING SERIOUSLY THOUGH  HELP ME

[Billy]

I'M TYPICALLY GOOD FOR WIN/WIN RELATIONS.  I LOVE YOU.

[Billy]

During that period in college when I pulled out a fish, just before that I was in a dorm room party and my female lover and I entered rapture and melting when the song 'Leaving on a Jet Plane' played.  I noticed you used it when almost abandoning this forum.  I don't know when you'll be back again.

But THAT was the thing about that relation-- I truly truly wanted her to be free, and only later found myself attached.  I doubt I would make that same mistake. 

I'll post until my heart is content.  You need not worry-- IF and when it is convenient to you is the ONLY TIME I need to hear from you.

[Billy]

AND the answer is YES I do feel your presence.  I can count 12345678910 and usually gain access.   A day, a week, a year whatever--no hurry.  I'll intend you if I need doing THAT.

[serloco]

They made me a new dinner/bar called uptown cafe, it is a Sun with buildings coming off of it like rays of sun. I forget why but I hated the last one that was there and commanded its removal.

Time is moving into the next soon.

I am a little fearful but my heart knows all is good. so close now.

My fear wants more time..

My excitement can not wait.

I had better clean up some more. I feel well though. Sometimes a devil banisher gets his hands a little dirty.

A city of pure light!

Oh release me my judgment.

will be back for more talk, but must do some things.. I have some suggestions and awareness for you....

but later.
take care.

[serloco]

i'm turning metal. and light.

just a fluid observer, now.

i forgot

i am dreaming.

barely holding form. spirit form.. almost..

i am clashing between who i used to be and who i have become.. and i can see the immensity around me. i am just a normal person, and i am an alien being to myself, in a world that is alien to me...

i am shocked, aghast.

i want to hide and yet awareness surrounds me..

there are times where we all see purely together..

lit up like a firework.

a universe through the eye of The Dragon.

[Billy]

billy wrote: 

Bruises,and cuts,and blows.  There are no painkillers.   IF IF I confused you, the mellowdramatic pain and story is fine... It is that I did not have clarity that ALL of this is the stuff of life to be gobbled up.  TASTY.

The estrangement from every family member sits like an indigestible lump.  The separation was already, but I had the illusion otherwise.   Blah, blah, blah. 

Tell me to quiet myself.

[Billy]

Okay, BILLY---QUIET yourself