Social Freedom vs Social Fears

[Gugeyewalker]

I've come to realize something over the last few months.

I have a very excellent petty tyrant in my life. This woman is in the family, mentally ill, and recently arrived on the scene to cause a great deal of loud chaos. 

This woman is relentless, attention hungry, daring, manipulative, angry, and sets such outlandish goals she doesn't give a damn what anyone says or thinks. The more resistance to her there is, the more relentless she becomes.

SOO I realized that the only way to deal with this, was to get 'outside of myself' and deal with this person as a petty tyrant. So I let myself slip into a state of daring and fearlessness that I discovered when I was 18 after a wild experience and sickness...brought this back to a degree.

To deal with someone who is socially fearless (but slightly touched) I have to be socailly fearless as well...this is what stalking is all about.

This takes work though. It is all about getting beyond social fears...I will go down the list of the more common examples of this.
-Speaking or performing in front of huge crowds
-Confrontation
-Approaching the attractive due to fear of rejection
-Approaching people in general
-Going for a job you dont believe you are qualified for
-Pitching a gutsy business proposal to a backer
-Standing up for yourself against assholes who usually get their way
-Showing some skin or being nude in general
-Being noticed
-Doing something that is a quality of the opposite sex (like wearing a skirt and lipstick for guys)

OF course - all of this stuff has to be done with your best effort and skill.  There is a purpose behind it - to shift your idea of your world. And of course you will fail from time to time. The idea is to intentionally put yourself in a situation that is socially awkward or scarey, and work through it. Do this actively and often.

In the end you get over the fear, and it becomes very fun and empowering.

[Gugeyewalker]

[Gugeyewalker]

Approaching attractive members of the opposite sex, or even better, the same sex, is one sure way of beginning to eliminate some of the most basic social fears. 

Self-importance is self-pity at the same time. Our internal dialogue is often the most verbally abusive tryant there is.

[serloco]

There is no "our's" here. You keep assumig we are all in your boat, trapped by your own views and judgements of what people are, what you are. That is true for you perhaps, but not for me. The nagua is unknown Mr. and also what I know is far beyond the whole "we are all the same" routine you continuously try to shove onto everyone. Listen to don Juan "people are mysterious beings". Suspend you judgement and stop your pityful anxious world!!

[serloco]

Try shrinking your tonal for crying out loud! Become small and humble.

[Gugeyewalker]

serloco wrote:There is no "our's" here. You keep assumig we are all in your boat, trapped by your own views and judgements of what people are, what you are. That is true for you perhaps, but not for me. The nagua is unknown Mr. and also what I know is far beyond the whole "we are all the same" routine you continuously try to shove onto everyone. Listen to don Juan "people are mysterious beings". Suspend you judgement and stop your pityful anxious world!!
Pray tell, what is the real truth for you, Serloco? 

Can you, stalk a new position? Not a position of a vampire or some kind of entity that allows you to get away with claiming whatever you want to claim. Can you stalk the position of an educated scholar for example? 

Can you stalk something utterly different than what you are? Would you dare to attempt to be clear about where your struggle is without doctoring it up with allies, vampires, and 'hooey'? Are you capable of becoming someone else?

Or are you scared of people knowing how you really are?

If so, then that is where you should start. 

But if you are SO different than me, and the rest of us, and if your struggle is already won, why the hell come here?

[Gugeyewalker]

Ever tried cross dressing? Do it, you're kinda stiff in personality; try changing it.

[serloco]

//www.youtube.com/embed/6QT2-88DCZ8

[serloco]

//www.youtube.com/embed/lHT_cYKujDA

[Gugeyewalker]

Rigidity is sooo bad.

You can have a stalking plan, like dress in an outfit with an utterly different personality and go out on the town, or attempt to make conversation with 10 strangers at the mall, or get a number from 3 women or men at the gym (that can be harder than it seems), and although you may succeed or fail the plan is likely NOT going to go the way you have envisioned in your mind at all!

Being deadset on a particular result or strategy reveals a certain rigidity and stiffness. The goal is to become fluid in your actions and your perception of the situation, eventually making the best of it. Quick thinking, relaxing, improvising, learning to do these things. You'll quickly find out which of the four qualities of stalking you have...patience, sweetness, cunning, ruthlessness, or a combination of them.

If someone wants to know exactly what I am doing and wants to share concrete ways to shift your perception of reality through this kind of thing feel free to pvt message me.

[serloco]

//www.youtube.com/embed/aUWOzyo-Kec?list= ... 834647EEED

[serloco]

Fluidity is great yeah but so is perfect cohesion on the role you want to be. I remember my encounter with an IOB, how you approach the scene inside is how it will manifest, the motion you give form time unfolding. Next is made from a position of awareness that see within oneself, and knows oneself and ones world. It is really just seeing, yet knowing those elements is to know the future. Like the seers of antiquity would position their bodies before venturing out into their worldly positions. Depending how they position is like the angle of entry. You have knowledge that says it is hard and does not work out the way you intend, and yet that IS YOUR intent and so really it does work out how you intend. Intentions are very much different then intent.

[Gugeyewalker]

serloco wrote:Fluidity is great yeah but so is perfect cohesion on the role you want to be. 
You got it baby! 

You probably don't need much more fluidity in your perceptions, I know for sure that I am too stiff.

My kung fu instructor said to me in his hong kong accent all the time "YOU ah too Siff! You need loosen up!" He was percieving more than just my body there,  the body definitely seems to reflects the mind.

[serloco]

More then that the body can reflect your surroundings, or rather your surrounding can project your motions. Like dancing to a song when he song moves your body without your thought or volition. To become volitionless and simpy trust the moment to move you. I remember training my body to realize that the Great Spirit around me knows all things perfectly, including my opponents moves even before he makes them. I said the moment will move my body perfectly and block every attack perfectly, the next day I sparred with one of the heavies and he threw a series of wild and fast combinations to which my body moved automatically and perfectly blocking every one automatically. When you learn to let go of yourself you can trust the nagual to move you. You become a conduit for what is beyond yourself.

Also in my advanced training I learned that my blows are in my perception and can be enhanced and special effects added into them. I remember the first time I did it I imagined y fists full of electricity. I touched my face and felt an incredible burst of electricity course threw my body like heart jumpstart machines in the hospital. The force of your blow is inside of your mind and when you conceive of the attack it is your connection that spurs the reaction. I have explored this and further by realizing that the same applies for he enemies attacks. They are all inside of your mind. I intended solidly that I can be hit many times very hard and suffer no pain in the attack. A week later I entered into a fight with some policemen and could not defend myself or suffer the charges of assault on an officer. One of them was very violent and suffered the consequences later of his actions however before that he repeatedly beat me to the ground and kicked me many times, even stomping my head into the concrete. I just sat there unphased waiting for it to be finished. Like as if. Everything I turned into a thought impulse then, I called it a mark shot, meaning with one thought I could transmute the blows, my own or theirs. The thought, my attention is pure fusion, pure prediction and command, and with control the attention is the essence of reality and thus can be fired directky uniting and manifesting the reactions within the thought.

[Gugeyewalker]

Okay so ...

All I can say is that this seems to be having a rather odd effect. I wish I had gotten into stalking social fears years ago.
Why? Well for the first time in about 4 years I recently got into a state of wierd depression. I wanted to be left alone, and could not quite identify the source. After all - life has been quite fine lately. I'd been meeting new people, staying in excellent physical condition, and building stuff I previously thought that I couldn't.

The sadness is that I have been a scared person most of my life, that is of people. I have passed up so many great opportunities due to being timid. There were so many great relationships I could have had, so many more teachers, and so many more careers. I have looked to so many things that I wanted, but believed they were beyond my reach. So I settle for that which I know I can predict, sort of. So sad...I have no one but myself to blame.

[Gugeyewalker]

serloco wrote: A week later I entered into a fight with some policemen and could not defend myself or suffer the charges of assault on an officer. One of them was very violent and suffered the consequences later of his actions however before that he repeatedly beat me to the ground and kicked me many times, even stomping my head into the concrete. I just sat there unphased waiting for it to be finished. Like as if. Everything I turned into a thought impulse then, I called it a mark shot, meaning with one thought I could transmute the blows, my own or theirs. The thought, my attention is pure fusion, pure prediction and command, and with control the attention is the essence of reality and thus can be fired directky uniting and manifesting the reactions within the thought.
That sounds very intense! Iv not been in many fights, especially prolonged ones with others. I am intimidated by the idea of fighting, but will if I have to, but always before have been really good at talking my way out of them although I've been into martial arts most of my adult life.

HOWEVER - I feel a certain wierd envy now. I recently made friends with an MMA cage fighter, and in my mind I am thinking that I could never do that...considering how hard these people train and the insanity that happens to meet a certain wieght class, not to mention being stuck in there with a dude you are supposded to beat down, cause pain, and the two of you may bleed all over each other, all while a crowd looks on and cheers.

Perhaps for all those reasons, and the fear or discomfort of that situation, I should seriously consider giving it a go. I cant beleive it, but yes I am considering it.

[Finwe]

I believe, the reason of fear and discomfort is the same, taking in comparement what we know is right and what happens to us, Isee the fear as only obstacle from freedom and the discomfort, the actual illusions of mine, Ihold on to my fears by, because Icannot find reason to it, Idont want to, I dont need to and Ieven, inside there, can't, because that's all it is about. Not in the world of warrior that relates from his heart as inside he is.

[Gugeyewalker]

Well, a lot of that fear comes from the idea of loosing who we are. Our established tonals are very self-important.

For example, I'd been told most of my life, especially by my mother, that I am so unique, smart, and special. That puts me on a pedestal that shelters me from others, for fear of being corrupted or loosing my 'uniqeness'.

I grew up in an environment of fear and hysteria about the world, of course I am not alone in that. People do stupid **** due to hysteria, insecurity, and fear more often than not.

I am not sure though that fear is ever totally absent in the world of a warrior - when some fears are overcome new ones arrive, new struggles and challenges. Warriors can and should be afraid or they aren't making some progress. I say to myself ,"Dammit I am scared shitless that I am about to do this," and then I also say to myself, "GOOD!" Then you go on ahead and do it anyway.

[Finwe]

Fear is what makes warrior stand in freedom rightfully.
Without fear there is no loosing of essence of warrior, heart, to be, his way.
With fear the essence of warrior and thus his life on earth, there is none rest or peace, for the fear is opposite of silence, the power that stops warrior's world.

[Gugeyewalker]

Are you putting undue value on rest and peace?

[serloco]

A man of knowledge is one who has followed truthfully the hardships of learning, a man who has, without rushing or without faltering, gone as far as he can in unraveling the secrets of power and knowledge. To become a man of knowledge one must challenge and defeat his four natural enemies.
When a man starts to learn, he is never clear about his objectives. His purpose is faulty; his intent is vague. He hopes for rewards that will never materialize for he knows nothing of the hardships of learning.
He slowly begins to learn--bit by bit at first, then in big chunks. And his thoughts soon clash. What he learns is never what he pictured, or imagined, and so he begins to be afraid. Learning is never what one expects. Every step of learning is a new task, and the fear the man is experiencing begins to mount mercilessly, unyieldingly. His purpose becomes a battlefield.
And thus he has stumbled upon the first of his natural enemies: fear! A terrible enemy--treacherous, and difficult to overcome. It remains concealed at every turn of the way, prowling, waiting. And if the man, terrified in its presence, runs away, his enemy will have put an end to his quest and he will never learn. He will never become a man of knowledge. He will perhaps be a bully, or a harmless, scared man; at any rate, he will be a defeated man. His first enemy will have put an end to his cravings.

It is not possible for a man to abandon himself to fear for years, then finally conquer it. If he gives in to fear he will never conquer it, because he will shy away from learning and never try again. But if he tries to learn for years in the midst of his fear, he will eventually conquer it because he will never have really abandoned himself to it.
Therefore he must not run away. He must defy his fear, and in spite of it he must take the next step in learning, and the next, and the next. He must be fully afraid, and yet he must not stop. That is the rule! And a moment will come when his first enemy retreats. The man begins to feel sure of himself. His intent becomes stronger. Learning is no longer a terrifying task.
When this joyful moment comes, the man can say without hesitation that he has defeated his first natural enemy. It happens little by little, and yet the fear is vanquished suddenly and fast. Once a man has vanquished fear, he is free from it for the rest of his life because, instead of fear, he has acquired clarity--a clarity of mind which erases fear. By then a man knows his desires; he knows how to satisfy those desires. He can anticipate the new steps of learning and a sharp clarity surrounds everything. The man feels that nothing is concealed.

_Carlos Castaneda and don Juan Matus

[Gugeyewalker]

Thanks for that serloco. When I first read that years ago I thought he was mostly talking about fear of allies or sorceru. It never occurred to me intil recently how fear applies to sociality.

Perhaps for stalking. ..
For any shame there is understanding
For any embarassment there is humor
For any hesitation there is daring
For any rigid pattern there is spontaneity
For any failed plan there is improvisation or persistence
For all negative thinking is the reality of positive success.

Sweetness is not foolishness.
Cunning is not cruelty.
Patience is not complancy.
Ruthlessness is not carelessness.

Here I am waiting on a city street at night for some thing to go by with a carefully formed strategy In plane sight but invisible to most. This Is comfortable. But my weakness is not lack of patience or being invisible...but whether I will have the ruthless abandon to act when the time comes. I will.

[serloco]

That is good you can indeed beckon power with words. Yet there are no failed plans when you trust first in the Spirit. It is ever beyond us yet knows the greatest way to any which-where, nd so to trust in it's perfection is also to yied to the perfection not yet attained by us. May the Spirit now guide us.

[Gugeyewalker]

Rejection Therapy

I just heard an interesting story on public radio about a man who struggled with great depression after his wife left him for a taller, more handsome, and wealthier man.

To pull himself out, he decided that he was afraid of rejection. Se he began actively seeking out rejection. He would ask a random stranger in the parking lot for a ride, or to go golfing with him. He would hand out religious flyers lol, or knock on a door and request a banana.

For every rejection he felt lighter and happier. His conclusions are - most fears are not seated in reality. You can disobey your fear and have the balls to socially 'walk on your hands'.

[Guest]