Lone Wolf

[Nagual LoneWolf]

I was born in Northern Texas. My mother was indian and my father was a scottish man. We grew up very poor. My father was a cowboy and worked at the ranches nearby. We had mainly indian neighbors where we lived and my childhood friends were all indians.
We spent most of our youth hunting, riding horses, exploring, and playing cowboy and indians (I was always the cowboy because I was white). Being outnumbered I usually ended up being "killed".
One night a great spiritual leader came to the area. A large gathering formed to hear him speak, for his fame had spread across the tribes. His name was Stalking Wolf.

All my friends had gone to the meet and I was late getting there with my mother. We sat in the back and listened. Stalking Wolf spoke of how times had changed. He made prophecies of the future and his tales were sad. Many listening I remembered weeped aloud.
There came a part where Stalking Wolf would look around his audience and call someone to him. A woman he brought up and said something to her about being with child. She was happy about it I remember. Then his eyes met mine and it felt like I was hit by lighting.
"Young boy" he called to me. I hid behind my mother. "Go on (she said) you are being called".
It took a little more motherly enforcement and I went forward to him where he was seated.
He was the most amazing indian I had ever seen and he was frightening to this white boy. "Your glow I could see from here son" Stalking Wolf said. "You are a born medicine man and if you do not go crazy you will do much in the world".
Everybody laughed and I was so embarrassed. Your name is "Lone Wolf" he went on. You will travel the world alone for your life.
Lone Wolf I thought, how does he give me this name?
"There have been many lone wolves in the world and now its your turn my son to be the lone wolf. Use your power for good and may you find peace but I highly doult it" spoke Stalking Wolf. He and the crowd laughed and I ran back to my mother.
All eyes looked back at me and many were eyes of wonder or fear. I vowed then to not reveal this to anyone for even when I was young I was uneasy in the "spotlight".
My mother called me "little wolf" after that and wolf became my nickname.
My parent broke apart years later. I lived at times with both of them. I lived in Oklahoma, Minnesota, California, Nebraska, Colorado, and Arizona during my childhood.
I never had friends because we moved so much. Truly did I become the lone wolf. Much of my free time was spent alone in the forests and mountains. I talked to trees and slept in their arms. Walked up to wild deer and fed them with my hands. Wild wolves and coyotes would come alone and let me pet them before running off. They seemed to sense I was more like them then the other humans.
To be continued:

[Nagual LoneWolf]

I loved to play with the wind. I remember holding out my hand and closing my eyes and waiting for the wind to stop whirling around me in the hills of Arizona. It was a game I played with the wind.
After awhile it would stop and I would wait. I knew if I opened my eyes I could not see the wind but it seemed to help if I closed my eyes while waiting. Then ever so softly I would feel something touch my hand. Very soft and very airey.
There would be a stroke then a more stronger tap. Often I would fall over being startled.
There was never nothing there when I opened my eyes. I laughed and how it did that. I loved the wind.
As a child, I found I could affect others with my thoughts. I could intend another to trip or hear something. Often I would play with strangers. Tapping them from across the street on the back. They would turn expecting someone there, then they would be puzzled and sometimes they would see me over there smiling at them. I would give them a wink and they would wonder.
Ah those were the days...

[Nagual LoneWolf]

Living in the world was something I found difficult in the world. I became obsessed with the idea of death. Once while in Arizona, I found I could stop my heart from beating. A terriflying ordeal as I had to make it start beating again after making it stop in order to live. I was shocked at how easy this was to do.
After that I knew I could mentally end my life at any moment. When learning the teachings I found that I could access the ASSEMBLAGE POINT of this type of alignment and it was possible to put another life form in this position. A awesome power and one I would never access.

[Nagual LoneWolf]

My father was a big hunter. He hunted elk and deer for most of his young life. He was a stern man and demanded perfection from the world and others.
His shoulder must have been sore alot because of the big chip he caried on it.
We hunted deer, wild fowl, javalina, and elk for many years together in Colorado and Arizona. I remember one day, we were in Oklahoma visiting my grandfather and we went to see the local buffalo herd.
My grandfather's grandfather was a great buffalo hunter and worked his life building the railroad across the west.
The herd was perhaps two hundred or more. They were big and wooly. My grandfather told the tale of how there was only a few herds left and this one was the largest or so I remember.
The buffalo were quiet and I was sad. In my imagination I could see thousands of them running across the plains and now they seem tame and kept and not free.
Today the buffalo is still alive and we as a nation should forever keep them going for they are majestic and part of us who live in the Americas.

[Nagual LoneWolf]

One night when I was a still a boy, I took a walk into the moonlight through a nearby forest. It was a full moon and there was a mist in the air. I was enchanted by the mist and went farther than usual. I came upon some talking trees.
They were not talking aloud but were communicating with thought or so it seemed.
One large tree was dying from within and the other which was half its size was pleading with it to not give up. The older tree was tired and would answer it couldn't hold on any longer.answer. This conversation went on for perhaps twenty minutes and then there was a sound I heard with my ears. A pop if you will.
I knew with silent knowledge the old one died.
The younger tree was silent. I sensed it felt me then.
I walked away in silence. I wanted to tell it something but I knew it knew how I felt.
The next day I went back to the forest to find the trees. It took awhile but I found them.
The large tree had fell in the middle of the night and knocked the smaller one over as well. Both trees were unrooted. I knew the younger tree was dying. I tried to push it back but it was too heavy. I ran back home and told my grandmother about the trees. She listened but didn't see what she could do. Dejected I returned to the dying tree.
I cried for it and put my hand on it.
I could feel its spirit slipping away. The tree was silent from then on.
Since then I guess I have closed my ears to trees.
I still love them though. Lone Wolf

[Nagual LoneWolf]

When I was in my childhood years, I was much bigger in size then the other boys. I excelled in sports and academics. However I would spend many of my days in the library. I would read every occult book I could find and there was a point where I was this little wiccan, practicing spells, and hyptonizing whoever I could get to listen with my voice.
I found my voice had great power. It could easily seduce or comfort. I learned to keep it low and under control.
My voice I would learn could directly affect the ap's of others. I didn't know they were called Ap's (assemblage points) back then but I knew what I could do.
The voice can be a direct link to power and one's personal power is reflected in their voice. My voice would make women surrender, enemies retreat, and friends agree.
I never was able to get along with the other boys when growing up. I was always being challenged to engage in fights. Many times I ended the confrontations with my developing power and after awhile I was known as the "strange boy".
As for girls, well that was another matter. Girls always loved me but that is another story to come.

[Nagual LoneWolf]

My parents grew apart when I was growing up and at the age of six my father left my mother and moved away up north. I went through a succession of step-fathers, each one worse than the preceding one. Three tyrants that would forge a young warrior.
Step father one was a alcoholic and would make fun of me whenever he could.I learned from him the art of lying. During this time I read "Huckleberry Fynn" and The "Odyessey" which had profound impacts on a very young impressionable child. I had the most difficult time getting along with other children during this period and would become a social outcast from this point on.
Step Father one showed me deception and he even hired a maid who he was caught cheating on my mother with. When this came out well he became history.
Step father two was a violent man. He would beat the hell out of me hoping to cure me of my outcast ways.I learned to stay away from his hands and would stay out late till he was asleep before going to my room as his temper was that of a madman.
One night he tried to strangle my mother. I found him in the bathroom with his hands around my mother's throat. She looked at me and I her. She gasped "run", which I did, I ran to the neighbors and police were called and he was stopped.
Step father three was the ultimate petty tyrant. He was a ex-green beret and full time soldier. He was also a war photographer and had a eye for detail. Another violent man whose goal as my step-father was to straighten me out.
I could tell stories about him for pages but I will say I could move a item on his bar a few cenimeters and he would instantly notice and demand who did it and there would be punishment. He constantly told me, I would never be anything and I was a loser and worthless,etc. etc.
He and my mother were together for many years before finally divorcing. One night we came to blows and I left my home for the final time.
Seriously, he made my life hell but I learned. Oh yes I learned...

[Nagual LoneWolf]

When I was a teenager, music became a passion along with the teachings of Don Juan.


I grew my hair out till it reached my belt. I listened to music so much, even at one point wanted to be a rock star.


I tried my hand at drums and guitar and even as a lead singer in a band but I wasn't very good.




I was also quite the casanova with my long hair, thin waist, and slender build. I compared myself to Robert Plant in looks and dress back then. The girls
worshipped me as a young god and I had many admirers.

[Nagual LoneWolf]

I studied many of the world's religeons back then during my library years. I had a diificult time understanding the bible. It was the language that put me off I think. I enjoyed the tales and found fault with many stories back then.
I delved into witchcraft, celtic lore, yoga, hindu beliefs, and whatever I could find. Nothing was me though till I discovered Castaneda. In his books I read what I knew.
Castaneda became my teacher. I used to write to him and we corresponded for a while. He was courteous in his letters and tried to answer my many questions. He encouraged me to dream as he wrote in his books. I remember when I first saw my hands and I wrote him an excited letter explaining my accomplishment but he never wrote back.
He seemed to disappear and then I learned of his death and it was as if I knew he had gone on.
At first I was in disbelief but as the news sunk in I realized how old he was and it was time for him to go.
I still will dream with him. He has had such a profound effect on my life that I will seek him out in the crossover.
Carlos wrote me, telling me Don Juan and Don Genaro were real and I believe him.

[Nagual LoneWolf]

I spent much of my young years hunting out in the wild. I hunted white tail deer every fall and was most of the time successful. Being a hunter taught me to move through the forests and hills with stealth and as a stalker.
As an avid student of Don Juan's teachings I was able to apply many of them when out in the woods.
There were times when allies would come and watch me in the night at various power spots. I didn't fear them but they would make the hairs on my back stand up! Allies to me were harmless as long as you respected them but knew in your heart they couldn't harm your body.
I learned to see the lines of the world. I saw the human mold and learned about the world through the unseen language of the nagual spirit. It was like a friend who would through the emissary tell me what was what.
I watched the water spirits with my handy mirror and often would turn around to see them but they were invisible to the human eye in our world unless you could grab one...
Growing up with only the teachings and being lucky enough to have wilderness areas with power spots, petty tyrants to train me, and a close relationship with the nagual, formed what I am now. There was though a changing when I burned from within and became the nagual. From that moment on, life took new meaning, and a ruthlessness evolved from my warrior spirit.

[T Screen]

Hey Lone Wolf, does that avantar have any special meaning for you? I was reading a poem today with the mention of death and the use of roses as a metaphor and it triggered that picture. Just a thought.
-windex

[Nagual LoneWolf]

Yes the wolf with a rose symbolizes the offering of the spirit from the wolf who is a sorceror and comes with a full moon.
There have been those who have asked me many times if I was ever told I was a nagual and the answer is I was told I was a four-sided being in 1984 by Valencia Mesquero, a prominent witch visiting from Mexico to Arizona.

[haiawata]

Hi Lone Wolf, thank you for give us your tales of power.I like them very much.Please explain us in more detail when you saw the mold of man and when you were burned from whitin.

[Nagual LoneWolf]

In time..in time. I will add more, this thread isn't over.
.
To all the members who have written to me about this thread I thank you for all your comments and support.

[Nagual LoneWolf]

I lived a life with basically no parents around. My father had gone away, my mother worked all the time, leaving me to my own devices. These days I supposed the child protective services would be called and I would be whisked away to a foster home.
I used to walk down to the railroad tracks where the hobos hung out and listen to their stories. Often they would be half-drunk and would carry on about their lost lives and family.
One old one was named Cracker and he had no teeth and would spit out food when he talked. He loved to tell scary stories about hobos getting killed by the trains. I asked him one time why the train's engineers didn't stop when they saw a hobo on a track. Cracker would get all serious and answer "Because they like killing us". "Hobos are nothing to them and they brag about how many of us they have ran over".
One day I was walking the track and found a sleeping hobo laying across the track rails. I grabbed his leg and tried to pull him off the track so he wouldn't get hurt. He awoke and was surprized to see me pulling on his leg. "What ya doin' boy"? He asked. I told him he would get run over. He laughed and said he had laid that way on purpose so he would know when the train was coming and then to leave him alone. Which I did.
Sometimes I guess when we have nothing left we wait for death on its track.

[SSilhouette]

Oh, I forgot to add that teaching helps me to remember what I know. Without it, I would forget everything and all that hard work would slip right out the top of my head.
"The Reality Is That You Will Die. The Uncertainty Is What Will Happen After That.."

[charlila]

stalking wolf had a white man apprentice - John - forgot the Indian name - mentioned somewhere by you?
i know a guy who learned from him, called Ofer Ishraely, who established "the garden keepers", still doing workshops here, including stuff like making a fire drill, a shelter, stalking prey, fox gait, stuff like that.
extremely important knowledge.

[Nagual LoneWolf]

When I was older I moved to Arizona to live with my father. I moved to the small town of Prescott. There I would learn much about myself and discover Carlos Castaneda.
I began reading the third book Tales Of Power. I was so emtralled I read the first two books imediately aftrewards. Astonished to see in print what I knew already I began the practicing the dreaming techniques and stalking.
The world changed for me even more and I became far removed from other human beings. My time was spent riding in the nearby Mingus Mountains, walking in the hills, and discovering knowledge from the indians that often visited the town.
Power came to me there and through a series of events, I was able to change for the first time shedding my human form.

[Nagual LoneWolf]

The universe is an infinite array of energy fields, that are seen by dreamers as threads of light.
These threads of light are the universe's energy.
Human's dreaming with their energetic bodies are also composed of our own energy fields. A dreamer can utilized the universe's energy with their dreaming bodies by entering the threads of light.
When this occurs, a very small group of the energy fields in the dreaming body are lit up to a point of intense brilliance from the contact of the threads.
Dreaming perception happens when the energy fields in the dreaming body immediately surrounding the point of brilliance extent their light to illuminate identical energy fields outside to the universe energy.
Since only human energy fields are lit by the awareness of the dreamer then there are only certain ones used in a point of brilliance, that point is named the assemblage point.
Our energy and the universe energy creates this assemblage point.
The assemblage point is usually seen in a particular area on the dreaming body when it is contacting the universe's energy. It can be moved to another position on the body or moved into the interior.
The assemblage point can light up whatever energy field it comes in contact with,(within or without) when it moves to a new position.
A dreamer while in the thread and with their assemblage point lit up by he threads of light can see the universe in its energetic form. It is the unigue perception that is commonly called "seeing".
Seeing of this type is always done in dreaming.
When the assemblage point shifts while in the thread of light, it moves the dreamer into other worlds of the band of that paricular perception.
A Dreamer can go into other worlds to get energy, power,or to escape death.
A Sorceror trys to use his awareness while in the thread of light to intend the shift of their assemblage point, this they must learn to master the path to power and eventually allow the possibilty of accessing worlds beyond the normal human experience.

[Mornings Son]

Thank you Wolf
I see the truth in what you write. It makes the pieces fall to right place.
I wonder about a couple of things.
- what you write about I experiece 'with in'when awake.
How does this connect with what you write?
- How do you visualize the AP point you want to change to?
Mornings Son

[Bob Carr]

Well, nothing like being in the right place at the right time, at least if one is to be a Seer.
Truly, yours is a Sorcerer's story, a Tale of Power.
How marvelous is the work of Karma and Power.
In my own case, the 1950's, when I was taken to Cherokee,NC, and had my picture taken with the "Chief." I ran away with fear, apparently an example of what some are calling demons, the Human Form, Race memory.
Yet, I live here today, drawn to the Eastern Cherokee land, Kituwah, by the unknown, to sing and dance as Warriors once did in the day.
According to a local paper, there are only 446 full-bloods left. They are rarely seen; I think there are more off-reservation as I see them at stores in surrounding towns. In fact , this is known.
This same paper has a picture of a Bear Mask, designed in the belief that bears were a clan that gave up their human shape to live in the forest.
I have no personal contact with KItuwah. Perhaps it isn't important.
I am waiting and I know what I am waiting for.
And , so much more to come, for I Dream and I See more than I ever have, simply from reading Castaneda.
The ability to read, whatever else I may not posses, is a blessing.
Bob CHawkeye and Crow

[delawaredan]

I greatly appreciate the clarification and the description of the assemblage point. Thank you for re-enforcing this into my intent.
On this day of being thankful, I feel the following tribute to the indigenous people is greatly needed.
What we are truly thankful for..To those......
myspacetv.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=3429779
Daniel

[Nagual LoneWolf]

The full bloods will soon change everything.-So says the Wolf.
The assembalege point can always be accessesd in dreaming or in awake state. It is your power, only you can define your power with your feeling of your intent.
I can talk to you forever about what I feel, but its what you feel that matters.
We all experience in dreaming the "rays of light". My intent is to remind you this is a good time to move your assembalge point.

[Bob Carr]

Sycronicity...
The day after I meontioned the Cherokee chief, he was pictured on the front page of our local news.
His name was Henry Lambert, and he began his 'take your picture with the chief' business in 1951. he died this week at 72 years.
Of course ,his costume was not authentic, but the tourists went for it. He made lots and lots of money doing his act.
I guess you could say he was a master of controlled folly.
The same man I met as a child. Now that's power in action.
Bob CHawkeye and Crow

[Bob Carr]

Lone Wolf:
Kiowa Warrior, companion to Satanta.
I've been dancing around this, so, may I express my gratitude for this post.
Some longings as well, for I would have had it in my own experience. I acknowledge your experience.
Been rereading "Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee" as well.
We live in a false world, in my opinion, and and may lead to the death of all.
Bob CHawkeye and Crow