billy's basic detachment practice

[Billy]

lol  I laughed until i cried

[Mornings Son]

billy wrote:Light existential self-humoring a la billy to billy:

    You have everything; a life of perfect balance, and just every desire fulfilled-- AND, the capacity to enjoy.. AND, this too realized to the full.  I SEE self-pity come to visit.  It shows me stark, spooky doom and gloom. 
   "I know who you are," says billy.  Self-pity answers, "YES.. you know me so certainly and with nice clarity."  "I know you are getting my message to WANT more.......   ...  Your wholeness is perpetual DESIRE.

"I don't want more," answers billy.  Nonetheless, self-pity is revealing, and not just in words.  So billy takes a glimpse.  "I often want MORE.. I get jolts, pangs, and a variety of cues to tell myself to hurry on after MORE.  I DO WANT MORE!"

The truth itself tries to take my freedom.

  What is your prediligence billy?
What do you really really love to do?
What is your path with Heart?

What does your Heart call for?
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[Billy]

Such an easy set of questions to answer, Mornings Son.  (not joking)

First, I must say I laughed with delight because this very issue of pre-diligence arose today in a very poignant way.  So, in fact all the answers to your questions were manifested even before you asked.

In fact, I leaned towards talking about it here.  I made mention that I was in a mode of 'scatteredness' a few days ago.  This is not a sustainable mode as to artfulness of being free/authentic.

However, any state will do in fluidity, as this brings what knowledge is needed when it is needed.

    So, this 'scatteredness' disintegrates into half-assed backwards manifestations, and I SEE as to why this is very clearly.  I had slowed it all down even as I was manifesting, and interpreted the 'negative' consequences as a gift for what was clarified.  Here goes >

  What I DO, is I take life and structure very seriously. 

  I remembered today how important it is to have a plan and a roadmap.  The tonal opens to the spirit because one tends to it properly as an artform and perfect expression.  My heart needn't call for anything whatsoever.  I am already given to my heart in a simplicity and purity that is utterly, deeply sacred.  This purity WITH the activities and disciplines of the tonal are already integrated.  I am wholesome and pure.  As you can imagine, I laughed at your questions because they struck me as comical in the context here.  Of course the purity, is purity because it is my SELF phenomenologically empty of meaning. 

So, how can it matter that I am sober about what I do?  Oh, and it matters a lot!  Such is GRACE!

Thank you for your questions Mornings Son.

[Billy]

I have immeasureable respect for you, AND your ideas Mornings Son.

[Billy]

The awareness for me concerning a roadmap and plan are not always specific at this juncture, BUT however general, I recall that I have these for instilling that I must pay attention to the principles of right thought and right action.  This is a very spiritual habit for SELF grounding.  Else........   ...

I'm not really sure what this 'else' is for another, but I have learned not to do else..........   ...

Openess to else (and when it comes to me) is not problematic for me, but I do not choose to be whimsical and without discipline.  I do not seek adventure, but I do allow it to come to me.

[Billy]

Mornings Son, may I step back?  

   Even billy recognizes his self-conceit in this case, though fully aware that it arises in part out of defensiveness and insecurities.  Please excuse this and enlighten me with what wisdom you were about to share.  Yes, I may have been on the right track with my ideas, but you have magnificent insights that sharpen focus in these matters.

Gassho

[Mornings Son]

Hey billy..

Thanks for the kind words ))

To be sure I understand you.

You found your path with Heart, in purity, disciplined practices and 'openness' (you call it scatteredness, it is being flexible and free of heavy structures of habitual thinking)

you are content, yes?

or not... still wanting more?

if so..
What is missing?

[Billy]

Mornings Son wrote:Hey billy..

you are content, yes?


or not... still wanting more?


if so..
What is missing?


Yes, I am very content.  It is positively certain I want nothing more in the conventional, material or social sense.  You have sharpened here the issue I speak of, which concerns holding the energetic tension.  That is, I still am not satisfied to keep in the present.  'More' definitely refers to the sense of reaching forward from out of this moment to another that does not exist.  It goes to the lack of abiding in the inner stillness you have alluded to several times.  I am learning patience surely, so I am quite open to your vast knowledge and the finer subtleties on honing the quiet spirit.  Thank you for such generosity, and overlooking my obtuse manners and arrogance.

[Billy]

Any quietude that cannot accomodate my disdain for existence is unwanted.  I truly have had moments of wanting out.  I do not love existence; I love my awareness; I love my awareness that reduces to "This is billy."

    I want no alliance with the world.

{these are floating abstractions I decided to forward here}

Note too, I do not say, "I want no interaction with the world."  The world is my source of nourishment.

[Billy]

This attitude just reflected above does not overwhelm my enlightenment; still, I put this there to show you that it is difficult for me to be always receptive.  The point being, my receptivity (lack thereof) is an obstacle Mornings Son.  I REALLY want you to get it through to me your wisdom on inner stillness or whatever, so I'm coming clean with this.  You CAN get around my obstinance, and this I want.

I am pursuing here because I am a hunter; I am stalking your knowledge Mornings Son.  I do not need to know your motive for wanting to help, though you may say what you like there.

[Mornings Son]

hmmm erasing... why?

[Billy]

I have not liked most of what I've written for a couple weeks.. suddenly I was on a deletion rampage  ? ?

{like I want to rid myself of things (some habits)}

[Billy]

The Flyers are playing basketball on ESPN2 in a few minutes.  My mind is definitely on that 100%

[Billy]

So you know, I previously invited Mornings Son to share his knowledge of inner stillness and completely backed off by mass erasure of my prior posts not fully conscious of my reasoning.

   To start, I apologize for those offended by having their posts left hanging like chads on voting cards.  While I would consider that unacceptably rude elsewhere, here on this forum I expect that the syntax of muted self-importance wins the day everytime.  That is, the maturity of the warrior's way calls for every person here to handle such with aplomb.  Though I admit that I would not always handle such omission like a seasoned warrior myself}.

  This morning my wife broaches the subject of spirituality with lots of relation to inner stillness.  I began to understand reluctance on several counts.  

  First, I do not like the concept of learning something out there; that is inimical to me.  I know when to relate and when I am ready to SEE; the fact of other is only as a mirror.  {My advice to others is to connect to your SELF, and listen ONLY to your self in the warrior's way (as to serloco, he immediately was.. and forever is of an identical spirit.. a perfect mirror).}

  Second,  I do not DESIRE inner stillness (now). 
    The manifested world may be illusory (if that be so), THAT is what I WANT.  {I want the world much like a vampire.. smile}

   Mornings Son, that's a lot of mud to reflect through so as to illuminate inner silence.  

   I will erase this post later.  Nevertheless and whatever, thank you Mornings Son.

[Billy]

Words are of inestimable value for reason and detachment.  Words understood, bring needed expansion and contraction.  Words are for me alone.  Cultivate that this is so for you.

[Mornings Son]

Oi privacy .. after very openness Understood ))

for me cultivating words is about how to share&respond best as possible... whatever it maybe

[Billy]

privacy is a kind word.  You are either sharp or my insecurities opaque.  lol.

Too, I don't want this thread to be about me.  I'm tired of a forum {meaning public discussion} being billy, billy, billy.  At the very least, someone tell me F.U. (Don't do it!)

[Billy]

In developed detachment as the 'way', the entire span of emotions can be what they are; that is, there is no REAL 'insecurity' about ANY.  In one sense, the mind is allowed to run wild, yet there is no fluctuation of being, no threat of dimentia.  One is held steady by awareness of simply being, waiting, allowing, and watching.  Occasionally, adherence or/and indulgement arises for self-action that is apart from the observer SELF ('normal' experience).  Pardon cliche; it is what it is.. then reason finally executes detachment.. says, "next."

  The way of detachment is akin to an algorithm, and reason is increasingly adept to identify self as image selves, and SELF as fluid SELF reigns authentic and true.. self-pities become flirtatious caresses that are exquisite expressions of emptiness.  What is seen is seen; unseemly states drown in humble MEANINGLESSNESS.

[Billy]

In developed detachment as the 'way', the entire span of emotions can be what they are; that is, there is no REAL 'insecurity' about ANY.  In one sense, the mind is allowed to run wild, yet there is no fluctuation of being, no threat of dimentia.  One is held steady by awareness of simply being, waiting, allowing, and watching.  Occasionally, adherence or/and indulgement arises for self-action that is apart from the observer SELF ('normal' experience).  Pardon cliche; it is what it is.. then reason finally executes detachment.. says, "next."

  The way of detachment is akin to an algorithm, and reason is increasingly adept to identify self as image selves, and SELF as fluid SELF reigns authentic and true.. self-pities become flirtatious caresses that are exquisite expressions of emptiness.  What is seen is seen; unseemly states drown in humble MEANINGLESSNESS.

[Billy]

I have to smile at poetic beauty in my piece above.  What is contrived?  What it is genuine?

  I am showy, but my motive is not ego showmanship.  I was lucky to be 'shown' and can share some.  Too, I am learning.  I am shaping myself with my own perceived wisdom and words.  And then too, I see my silliness here is the lenience of indulging my private microcosim.  How can I be serious? There are other worlds and personal visions, and this is but a singular artistic angle.

[Billy]

In developed detachment as the 'way', the entire span of emotions can be what they are; that is, there is no REAL 'insecurity' about ANY.  In one sense, the mind is allowed to run wild, yet there is no fluctuation of being, no threat of dementia.  One is held steady by awareness of simply being, waiting, allowing, and watching.  Occasionally, adherence or/and indulgement arises for self-action that is apart from the observer SELF ('normal' experience).  Pardon cliche; it is what it is.. then reason finally executes detachment.. says, "next."

  The way of detachment is akin to an algorithm, and reason is increasingly adept to identify self as image selves, and SELF as fluid SELF reigns authentic and true.. self-pities become flirtatious caresses that are exquisite expressions of emptiness.  What is seen is seen; unseemly states drown in humble MEANINGLESSNESS.

[Billy]

I have to smile at poetic beauty in my piece above.  What is contrived?  What it is genuine?

  I am showy, but my motive is not ego showmanship.  I was lucky to be 'shown' and can share some.  Too, I am learning.  I am shaping myself with my own perceived wisdom and words.  And then too, I see my silliness here is the lenience of indulging my private microcosim.  How can I be serious? There are other worlds and personal visions, and this is but a singular artistic angle.

[Mornings Son]

Sounds like a gooood process man !

you made this post here in...

The New Seers
Create Your Personal Space,
Show Us How You See Reality

So it is fine it is personal, completely in its place.

What is wrong with it being about billy?

(billy is hardly anybody any more, right?)

[Billy]

Oh yeah, always have been cognizant of the threads setting, otherwise no way..

IMO, practicality and the warriors way go hand in hand.

[Billy]

Mornings Son wrote: