Battle of my life

[serloco]

There are two classifications for life that needs another life to survive. One is called a parasite which takes from the life without giving back, or takes more then what it gives, and then there is the symbiotic life form. Symbiosis requires that the life form give back equally or more.

[glance left]

Yeah, I was thinking about that....whether that's a possibility in terms of "intelligent collaboration" with respect to the twin world.  The "more" that you describe being a synergistic interaction.  

On the whole, however, in its current state.....it doesn't seem like symbiosis.  It seems like straight up base rape

[glance left]

So the answer, if there is one, is the emergent intelligent collaboration in the context of mutual containment.  That seems the way for true synergy to emerge.  

That means, for me, disentangling from the sweaty 69.  There's gonna be a pregnant pause (maybe some withdrawals)....awkward....maybe boring, compared to the writhing fck-ball, as Rosy put it.  But, ultimately, soooo much more given natural expression of rising energies within our mutual containment fields.  Twin worlds.....contained....empowered from within.  Interacting in forbearance....the way it was supposed to be.

I'm sure I'm missing an ocean of details/considerations.  I confess, my seeing goes only as deep as my capacity to see.....pretty superficial.  Thus the idealism.  But sometimes naivete can lend to trust.  The kind that lets power and intelligence of infinity in to flesh out the details

[glance left]

Yesterday I saw, suspended in the void, a swirling spiral of beings who had the configuration of spherical blue flames with flickering tops. Scores and scores of them. They were gathered around a stage upon which was elevated a colossal Tibetan letter “A”, strobing with multicolored light, like a deep sea jelly

It’s the symbol, in Dzogchen, of primordial awareness....the Great Perfection. Achieving the frictionless state which engages all and accepts all simultaneously.....the Rainbow Body.

[glance left]

[serloco]

The rainbow body eh.. sounds familiar. I am breaking away from much of my sorcery practices and venturing into other areas. I remember discovering what I called the source. It is like the rainbow body. All of everything imaginable and more all at the same time. A state I would love to achieve once more.

[glance left]

Do it, man! And, if you can......come back and share .

Imagine having perennial access to that state.....while moving in and out of the formed frontier of the dreaming universe.

Sailing the high seas of Infinity

[serloco]

Yeah for sure. I remember i discovered it when i first dove into sorcery. I had intended to see the source of everything, where everything came from. Thats when it hit me, the totality of life and death, everything and nothing in a perfect perpetual balance.

[rosygyro]

JOKE-

Q-Did you hear about the racist who tried to cultivate a universal energy body?

A- zi-klashnibad.

Hahahahahahahaa

[glance left]

Rosy ¿

Serloco. I had, perhaps similar experience. I shifted awareness with the intent to find the source. On my way, I arrived at a second attention locale which was rolling hills of verdant green grass. There was a guy standing there on top of a hill just kind of hanging out. He waved me down beckoning me over. He asked me where I was going. I said, To the source. He said, Good!! When you get there, ask it what the h3lll is going on! Ever since I got here, no one has explained anything to me. I told him I would do my best. I traveled on, arriving at a colossal portal through which this view of an impossibly complex, intelligent display of threads of fractal colors swirled and boiled. An infinite sea of celestial light all crammed together in the area of that portal, like the swirling center of the galaxy. I stood there in unbridled awe for who knows how long...utterly speechless. Finally I began my return journey. And I again saw my friend on the hill top as I flew by. I landed and walked up to him. He recognized me right away and asked, Well?!! Did you make it to the source? I said, Yes. He asked, What did you learn? I looked at him squarely and said, There are no answers. I left at that point and arrived back in my meditating body

[serloco]

You know what I think? I think the trips to the source are custom designed. Because just before i went i knew that multiple parallel universes existed and when I got there it was custom made for me to see that EVERY dimension existed. I bet if my awareness were different then I would of seen something else.

[rosygyro]

serloco wrote:
You know what I think? I think the trips to the source are custom designed. Because just before i went i knew that multiple parallel universes existed and when I got there it was custom made for me to see that EVERY dimension existed. I bet if my awareness were different then I would of seen something else. 

Meeting a man in the midst of their folly
can become a shift to another dimension.
Any living being is able to be transmissive of the nagual intent
if your awareness is able to perceive it.

It is the most simple folk, the ones who do not question their personal power but who acquiesce to the nature of life-i.e. farmers, or the nature of family i.e. gypsies, or the nature of the mechanical- i.e. agricultural mechanics etc.. People who genuinely do not get much satisfaction from psychic battle, or emotional attachments.. but who can if you are brave enough to perceive them- transmit the nagual via their alignment with environmental process.

of course it will also require you to move your assemblage point to the position of man- and not be the natural in the conversation..

ego is such a killer.

[rosygyro]

battle for my life.

I was grieving for a friend and had decided to follow a spiritual path of horror.
I was becoming homeless.
I had already spent 2 weeks on the streets.. sleeping in parks and on bustops. I was hallucinating from lack of good sleep and decided to catch a train to London to be homeless there instead.

I got to a mainline station and decided to catch the underground train to elsewhere in the city, where I imagined (in my minds eye) that someone would stab me to death under a bridge by the river.

I walked up to the edge of the platform and everything went dark green..

somewhere in the dark green I made out 20 days ahead of me
and the realisation that before those 20 days I would be dead.

I realised the 20 days were a cycle..
connected to the tzolskin.

I managed to use this vision of the dark green mayan underground calendar as justification enough to catch a train back across the country to live a bit longer
and make sense of what I saw.

I slept in my clothes and hoes for another 6 weeks..
I couldn't get off the streets.

[rosygyro]

and then I bought some authentic cicada cocoon trousers and a load of copal resin, propolis, white sage  , eagle feathers etc.. and started charging people 300bucks an hour to patronise them.

[rosygyro]

Or there was that time where I was so suicidal that the only way to bring myself through it was to get creative about how to do it.
I spent a while contemplating a jump off an 80foot cliff and attempting to shapeshifter as a fell through the air so when I hit the floor.. finally my foreign fibres would be ejected at a different angle..
hoping to give myself a clean slate for just a moment so as to leap to infinity.
I was also contemplating making a metal rack to hold ceramic pots which I intended to fill with thermite..
and then lie underneath them and burn myself to ash in 20seconds flat...

so I would suicide myself in two ways..
one through velocity of my body and a stationary impact.
the other a stationary body and the velocity of 2000centigrade thermite..

somehow between the two I managed to laugh..

[rosygyro]

and then there was the time some egotistical arrogant ****, failure in the path of integrity decided to try and make a name for himself by spiritually attacking me...

why wasn't he focused on his own work..?

I dunno.
some people are a liability for us all..
and you know that when the riddle of death starts filling their vessel with their own dues
they will be trying to find lesser humans to carry the challenge.

I hate the new age... it brings out the worst in people.

[rosygyro]

once I turned a quartt of milk to yogurt by screaming at it.

[rosygyro]

back in the old days (2004).
I tried to open a portal to the sorcerers world.
I found an abandoned house and decided it was one such world.
I broke in.. and threaded a power cable through it to the front door and ground the lock out.
all the time envisioning a world of tentacled beasties living outside.

the house was truly terrifying.

in the dining room I found a heap of crow bones.. and could clearly see a triangular shaped entity perched in the corner watching me with its ten eyes,
in the hallway a river of blue fire ran beneath the floorboards,
beneath the stairs a reptilian computer station would phase in and out of a parallel dimension,
the flames on the cooker were impossibly tall.. so they would seem 20cm sign whenever I went to boil a pan of water,
the outside toilet had an enormous spiritual gecko living in it.. and the tree was a white inverted squid holding red orbs in each tentacle.
the bathroom inside had a bone spider that lived above the door.. and whenever I thought about going for a piss it would come screaming down the corridor and latch onto my face..
in the 1 bedroom a crocodile lived under the bed and in the other a sorcerer toucan was lodged in the wall.
the attack had an invisible ladder made out of rib bones leading up to it and inside was a 2foot diameter otherworld viewing glass surrounded by a realm of rotting orange peel within which aliens were scrying this dimension...
and from inside to look at the street it was being perpetually formed by dragons scouring the earth to dust with their bellies...
the lounge had the most amazing paisley wallpaper.. that if you looked at it for more than a second would start to climb out of the wall and envelope you the observer.

The house was insane.. and from within it.. the normal world was insane..

I would programme myself milk a robot.. just to go to the shops and get back in one piece.

[rosygyro]

and then someone said- "man why don't you try meditation.."
and I thought,, "just shut up, you don't know the intensity of an awake mind, I will save the silence till I am dead"

[rosygyro]

I spent some time trying to build a time travelling gypsy caravan.. which I believed I could use to navigate my way around the universe from inside carnivals and festivals..

If you have ever been at a large disorganised party and seen someone peering out of a caravan opening and closing the door and looking terrified..
thats probably me.

[rosygyro]

I tried to catch him a few times... as well..
trouble is, I also used to use the point of no pity in a loving contest in order to assess wether I was tantricllly matched with the female I was pursuing..

so of course she would then get paranoid about catching a disease as that was my intent..

and I wouldn't even get laid.

so I gave up trying to get love aids..
it was quite a depressing heartfelt story anyway.

[rosygyro]

And then this one time at band camp.

[rosygyro]

the difference between an assemblage point move and an assemblage point shift..
is the difference between choosing to do something for the moment and choosing to do something for your totality.

by the end of your life it is only going to be those parts which match your totality which will be part of your leap.

anything which was will or avoidance no matter how well enacted is going to be wasted power.

[glance left]

Wow!! That’s incredible......I mean just speechless! Yeah, I would get torn apart under that kind of pressure, for sure. My little two compartment frame can only deal with so much

Couple days ago, trying to open up to the recapitulation framework being offered here in this thread.....as much as I can understand of it, in my own way....I was met with intensity that, for me felt almost too much.

It’s form was of a boiling wave of fractal colors, gushing through myriad threads of light.....all aware.....vastly intelligent.....unimpeded. That burdgeoning front was trying to push up and through me.....like a foaming concoction that I had swallowed and began to erupt within my cells, it seemed. The whole process seemed to be driven by these ever emerging waves of layers of sonorous Tibetan throat/overtone singing that was either coming from or propelled by the visual process.

And then......the feeling. Excruciating vibration coursing through every cell. It was pure joy! But too much for me! My little ego contained form could not endure it. I felt like I was being boiled/torn apartfrom within by not heat, but just sheer vibration and light and feeling. I was weeping from the pressure until the wave subsided, leaving me to my little existence. Take home point for me was that I’m not big enough or flexible enough yet for whatever’s coming. You’re right....self importance is the limiting thing.

Anyways I agree with Serloco. It seems that intensity and interface with infinity is kind of tailored to each persons configuration.

[glance left]

Yeah, everything that’s happening now seems to be revolving around an inner collective convergence. Hopefully I can get out fo it’s way